Few quick observations and questions:
- How long after your complete discontinuation of BZD's did you wait before continuing their use again (assuming you have)?
- After the withdrawal period had apparently ended, did you feel significantly 'worse' than you did in the years or months prior to your initial abuse/regular use of BZD's (ie, "old self" comment)
- Prior to any BZD use, did you experience any form of psychosis (particularly, auditory or visual hallucinations), reoccurring delusions or paranoi(those which were NOT associated with overt manifestations of an acute anxiety disorder or mood disorder mania)?
- What were you past psychiatric diagnoses that you feel were (and still are) more or less accurate, such as a GAD-variant etc
- Why did you so strongly disagree with the recent Dx of schizoaffective?
Note: Not to discredit a potentially legitamite Dx, but I have seen a number of cases where it is seemingly employed by psychiatrists as a 'save face' blanketing-term for what is in reality 'various psychiatric disorder(s)-NOS' (some may have been deemed too time-consuming/complex to properly unravel and treat in a less formulaic manner).
- I lost my train of thought with that side note........Uh, don't do drugs, stay in school and so forth
I used lorazepam (along with lithium, valproic acid and olanzapine) for as long as the treatment was prescribed (15 days) and haven't go back to that doctor since. He gave me lorazepam for I asked for something for anxiety (not a benzo specifically): muscle pains, insomnia, and social anxiety, and basically been introverted and thinking the same things over and over again, for example: as when saying hi to someone on college, imagining it over and over but in different scenarios (what if I had say this instead of that, etc).
I don't agree with the diagnose because drugs had no effect whatsoever on me, none, plus, I don't have any mood changes.
I did developed psychosis for a few days when withdrawing from a 8mg clonazepam/day habit for the first time, I lasted 8 days and gave up, I finally kicked benzos on january tapering and using carisoprodol ocassionally.
I've always been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, be it social anxiety or avoidant personality, that was the first time someone gave me an "diagnostic impression" of schizoaffective disorder, after 20 mins of consult.
Never experienced any other sign of psychiatric symptom prior to my first visit to the psychiatrist, just sheer anxiety, and I feel kinda the same right now.
And after quitting I felt worse at the begininning but with my taper plan and soma I eventually felt good again (that being my old anxious self).
So I quit in march completely, and took the ativan for 15 days in october. Haven't use them again as they have no effect on me whatsoever, and feel no compulsion to try them again.