BenzoMonster
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Mar 7, 2014
- Messages
- 1
Ok well just thought I might share my last experience I had with K-Pins. So about 2 months ago I was in a bad depressive state which had been going on for 2 years. I had been prescribed k-pins for 3 years prior to this incident. At first when I started taking them years ago I would take 3 to 5mg and drink some beer to get a pretty good buzz going and black out usually. I really enjoyed them and started using them more and more because I loved being around people and going to party's when on them due to the fact that I completely didn't give a shit about anyone when I was on them and felt completely free to act how I wanted to around other people. Fast forward a couple months from when I was originally prescribed them and my Anti Social personality traits started to get a lot worse. My little empathy I had for people was diminishing fast, I truly didn't care about people one way or the other. They were just a means to have fun and cure my boredom. I continued to take my k-pins in higher doses along with starting to get into opium and vyvanse/adderall. The vyvanse and adderall just made me even more aggressive and untrustful of people, so I stopped taking it due to feeling on edge all the time when in public. I continued to abuse the clonazepam for another 2 years from that point and got my dose bumped up to 1mg.
Then 2 months ago I was fed up with the world and wanted to give up on connecting with people. I took 25mg clonazepam and drank the rest of some whiskey that was left over. I wrote a note to my brother apologizing for being a dick over the years, and wanted him to have all my possessions. I passed out around midnight, and was abruptly woken up by police who were called apparently when my family opened my door for some reason and found my note. Keep in mind we had been bitching and screaming at each other the whole day before that night, and I had muttered a comment about being fed up with my life earlier in the day.
So I was arrested and forced into and ambulance. They rushed me to the hospital where I attempted to escape when the Security Guards were not looking, which resulted in me being tackled by 3 guys and sedated. Was not fun. Spent a week in the psych ward due to being baker acted, and finally got released after being put on 3 shitty anti psychotic meds. Had to manipulate the psychiatrist into thinking the meds were working and I was fine. After the doctors figured I was "stable" they allowed me to be discharged and be transfered to a Natural holistic treatment center where I spent a month and got tapered off the anti-psychotics completely.
So my reason for writing this is to advocate against using benzos recreationally unless you truly can handle not abusing them except on rare occasions, which most people can't. They fuck your emotions completely if used a lot IMO. And just doing a search on the internet can give results on tons of benzo blackout stories and horrible decisions people make when on benzos or when mixing things with benzos. Like my psychologist said, for many people benzos can be the most addicting substance there is. Even more than heroin for long term benzo addicts. I can't say either way because I have never been one to abuse opiates often. Either way I will never used benzos again.
Also I developed bad anxiety and paranoia due to abusing coke daily along with a little meth when I spent half a year in California. Pretty much used every common hard drug there is when I was down there except crack.
Then 2 months ago I was fed up with the world and wanted to give up on connecting with people. I took 25mg clonazepam and drank the rest of some whiskey that was left over. I wrote a note to my brother apologizing for being a dick over the years, and wanted him to have all my possessions. I passed out around midnight, and was abruptly woken up by police who were called apparently when my family opened my door for some reason and found my note. Keep in mind we had been bitching and screaming at each other the whole day before that night, and I had muttered a comment about being fed up with my life earlier in the day.
So I was arrested and forced into and ambulance. They rushed me to the hospital where I attempted to escape when the Security Guards were not looking, which resulted in me being tackled by 3 guys and sedated. Was not fun. Spent a week in the psych ward due to being baker acted, and finally got released after being put on 3 shitty anti psychotic meds. Had to manipulate the psychiatrist into thinking the meds were working and I was fine. After the doctors figured I was "stable" they allowed me to be discharged and be transfered to a Natural holistic treatment center where I spent a month and got tapered off the anti-psychotics completely.
So my reason for writing this is to advocate against using benzos recreationally unless you truly can handle not abusing them except on rare occasions, which most people can't. They fuck your emotions completely if used a lot IMO. And just doing a search on the internet can give results on tons of benzo blackout stories and horrible decisions people make when on benzos or when mixing things with benzos. Like my psychologist said, for many people benzos can be the most addicting substance there is. Even more than heroin for long term benzo addicts. I can't say either way because I have never been one to abuse opiates often. Either way I will never used benzos again.
Also I developed bad anxiety and paranoia due to abusing coke daily along with a little meth when I spent half a year in California. Pretty much used every common hard drug there is when I was down there except crack.
