Being emotional part of withdrawals?

[Oxy_Ghost]

I don't know if it's just part of the withdrawals or if I just miss them so much but for the past few days I have done nothing but cry off and on all day. I've been by my Fiancés side for almost seven years and the other day she went to detox and I just can't stand to be without her Everything around me remind me of her and even the slightest thought of her makes me cry. I don't know when I'm gonna be able to see her or talk to her. Her visitation is on Saturdays and Sundays but my dad has to go see my mom at her rehab center tomorrow and Sunday I'm going to visit my daughter. I don't know what to do. I want, no, I need to see my fiancé. Shes more than just my other half and I've never been away from her for this long. I stare at my phone all day waiting for a call from her but it has yet to come. I just have no clue on what to do.

My brother is in the Air Force but he's on the other side of the world which makes me even more emotional cuz I haven't seen him in a long time and me and him are really close. I just got off the phone with him so I'm still an emotional wreck. I guess I've just hit a bad state of depression having my fiancé and daughter taken away from me even though it's only for a little while. So I'm wondering if this is just all a part of withdrawals and if it will get any better. I feel like it's not gonna get much better as long as my fiancé is away. I feel the only thing that's gonna help is to have her and my daughter in my arms again an once I do I'm never letting go. This is all the more reason for me to get sober and stay sober. This has been the worst experice of my life and I never wanna go through it again. I'm so happy shes getting help but I wish she could've done it by my side.

Well thanks for listening. I really needed to vent. Even though I'm still on the verge of balling my eyes, I sorta feel better but I don't feel like I'm where I wanna be.

After reading the description for "The Dark Side" forum, I guess this should be moved over there. So if a mod could plz do that I'd appreciate it. Thanks

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

I've never had any sort of withdrawals from drugs or alcohol but yes if you are withdrawing from drugs that you're physically and/or psychologically addicted to you probably will be emotional. This happens to people in various ways. A friend of mine who smoked for decades when she finally quit either cold turkey, or with medication she responded by becoming very angry at everyone even her daughter and son.

Can you write your fiancé a letter or email? Or does the detox/rehab place she's in allow calls?

Be there for your daughter, and for your mother and fiancé too. I'm not sure when the detox/rehab place allows visits but you should try contacting her in other ways if you can't visit.

At least you realize that using drugs or not staying sober will not improve things. Things will get better just hang in there, and you wrote how this is just temporary so keep telling yourself that, and staying sober. Good luck.

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

I don't know if I can write or email, I don't think I can. And I'm not sure about calls. I think for the first few days they don't allow them to call so hopefully she'll call in the next couple days. She has visitation on Saturdays and Sundays but my dad would have to take me but he's going to see my mom on Saturday and on Sunday I'm going to see my daughter so I might now have time to see my fiancé. I think I'm gonna try to work something out to where I can go see her on Sunday first and then go see my daughter for a while on my way home. In a way I'm hoping she's just staying for a few days for detox and not a 30 day rehab. Cuz I think that if she just gets clean and comes home than we can do NA meetings. The past few days have be em a real wake up call for us and we're done with the drugs for good. Never going back to a shitty life style. So I'm pretty sure neither of us are gonna relapse. I know there's always gonna be a chance but after these events, there is a very very very slight chance of using again. I'm committed to staying sober and I'm sure she is too. I just want her home in my arms where she belongs

 

[Eveleivibe]

I don't know if it's just part of the withdrawals or if I just miss them so much but for the past few days I have done nothing but cry off and on all day. I've been by my Fiancés side for almost seven years and the other day she went to detox and I just can't stand to be without her Everything around me remind me of her and even the slightest thought of her makes me cry. I don't know when I'm gonna be able to see her or talk to her. Her visitation is on Saturdays and Sundays but my dad has to go see my mom at her rehab center tomorrow and Sunday I'm going to visit my daughter. I don't know what to do. I want, no, I need to see my fiancé. Shes more than just my other half and I've never been away from her for this long. I stare at my phone all day waiting for a call from her but it has yet to come. I just have no clue on what to do.

My brother is in the Air Force but he's on the other side of the world which makes me even more emotional cuz I haven't seen him in a long time and me and him are really close. I just got off the phone with him so I'm still an emotional wreck. I guess I've just hit a bad state of depression having my fiancé and daughter taken away from me even though it's only for a little while. So I'm wondering if this is just all a part of withdrawals and if it will get any better. I feel like it's not gonna get much better as long as my fiancé is away. I feel the only thing that's gonna help is to have her and my daughter in my arms again an once I do I'm never letting go. This is all the more reason for me to get sober and stay sober. This has been the worst experice of my life and I never wanna go through it again. I'm so happy shes getting help but I wish she could've done it by my side.

Well thanks for listening. I really needed to vent. Even though I'm still on the verge of balling my eyes, I sorta feel better but I don't feel like I'm where I wanna be.

After reading the description for "The Dark Side" forum, I guess this should be moved over there. So if a mod could plz do that I'd appreciate it. Thanks

Short answer - yes being emotional is part of withdrawals.
But sounds like you're going through a lot here so of course it's understandable that you would be emotional. It must be really difficult not being able to see your fiancé right now but try to think that this is just a short time in a long time split that you will be together. Isn't it worth it if she gets well and you also get better? Spend the time seeing your little girl as she also needs you and that is also important and bide your time.
You're doing the right thing in positing for support. We're here for you so please keep posting and hang in there ok.
Thinking of you and sending best wishes,
Evey

 

[muskolo]

It's completely normal. As a matter of fact, it is the most difficult aspect of opiate withdrawal for me--far more than the physical.

Hey, count yourself VERY lucky to have someone there with you though, even if she is not there in person.

 

[Swarm]

Withdrawals's make your head go fucking screw man! In my experience the worst for this are benzo's / alcohol, though opiates aren't too clever either.

That said come down's can be every bit as tricky. i remember coming off a 3 day crystal meth binge when i was abut 18 trying to convince all other's present in the room to get hold of gun so I could please blow my fuckin brains out. Dark times.

It's completely normal. As a matter of fact, it is the most difficult aspect of opiate withdrawal for me--far more than the physical.

Hey, count yourself VERY lucky to have someone there with you though, even if she is not there in person.

The opiate withdrawal thread worked wonders for so many of us over the last couple of months, as evileivibe will surely be able to concur with me on this one. Support is so fucking important. In some ways, for me, I prefer the person not to be present. I know it's different for your situation Oxy Ghost, being in love and everything and all the closeness etc.. but for me, well with all the physical symptoms of withdrawal i kinda prefer to be by myself and have the support in form of contact reach me via the words on the screen. Alone and with company simultaneously - sounds like an oxymoron but that's they way I like it personally.

p.s

How's it going Evileivibe - will PM you in a bit

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

Well I'm feeling much better today. I get to visit both of them tomorrow afternoon so the depression has subsided but now it's anxiety. I can't wait to see them.

Withdrawals's make your head go fucking screw man! In my experience the worst for this are benzo's / alcohol, though opiates aren't too clever either.

That said come down's can be every bit as tricky. i remember coming off a 3 day crystal meth binge when i was abut 18 trying to convince all other's present in the room to get hold of gun so I could please blow my fuckin brains out. Dark times.

I hear ya there, there was many times when I wanted to blow my brains out when I was using. It would've been very easy for me too cuz I got guns all over my house, Pistols, shotguns, rifles...but every time I felt like that I would think of my fiancé and daughter and realize how much they need me. So I eventually calmed down

 

[Eveleivibe]

That's bloody ace news.
Hope it all goes well for you xxxx

 

[dwamn]

it sounds like the wds are only a small part of it you seem to be having serious separation anxiety which can be very depressing

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

it sounds like the wds are only a small part of it you seem to be having serious separation anxiety which can be very depressing

I think your right. I've been with my fiancé for almost 7 years and have never been away from her this long. Same goes with my daughter. She's 5yrs old and I've never been away from her this long either. I've been away from my fiancé for a few days at a time but I was always able to talk to her and I could've gone to see her whenever I wanted but not this time. I don't know what to do even though I'm going to see her tomorrow. It's only gonna be for an hour and I know my depression and seperation anxiety is gonna skyrocket when visitation is over. I'm terrified to ask her when she's coming home. I'm scared to think that she's gonna be there for a month. I seriously don't know what I'm gonna do. I feel like her dad is gonna "make" her stay but he can't, she's 22 and he can't "make" her do anything.

 

[Space Firebird]

I agree with some of the others.
Every time I come down I get emotionally depressed, which is part and parcel of drug withdrawals.
You, OTOH, are talking about real world problems, which aren't just in your head, so this is a different matter.
Anyone would feel bad to be going through what you are dealing with.

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

I agree with some of the others.
Every time I come down I get emotionally depressed, which is part and parcel of drug withdrawals.
You, OTOH, are talking about real world problems, which aren't just in your head, so this is a different matter.
Anyone would feel bad to be going through what you are dealing with.

Yeah but I think withdrawing isn't helping. I'm sure if I wasn't getting clean and my fiancé was than id still be pretty depressed cuz she wouldn't be with me. Hopefully tomorrow when I visit her ill have an idea of when she's coming home and hopefully it's soon. I can't take another day without her. Usually when she's gone for a few days I still have my daughter in my arms

 

[neversickanymore]

Being emotional is both a part of withdrawals, Both acute and post acute as well as an integral part of addiction. Here is some good information incase you haven't browsed through it yet.

Addiction is characterized by2:

• Inability to consistently Abstain;
• Impairment in Behavioral control;
• Craving; or increased “hunger” for drugs or rewarding experiences;
• Diminished recognition of significant problems with one’s behaviors and interpersonal relationships; and
• A dysfunctional Emotional response.
• The power of external cues to trigger craving and drug use, as well as to increase the frequency of engagement in other potentially addictive behaviors, is also a characteristic of addiction, with the hippocampus being important in memory of previous euphoric or dysphoric experiences, and with the amygdala being important in having motivation concentrate on selecting behaviors associated with these past experiences.

From the difintion of addction found in Addiction Guide

Emotional overreaction or numbness

People with emotional problems in early sobriety tend to over-react. When this overreaction puts more stress on our nervous systems than we can handle, we react by “shutting down” our emotions. We become emotionally numb, unable to feel anything. We may swing from one mood to another. These mood swings may baffle us, seeming to come without any reason, and may even be misdiagnosed as bipolar disorder. If we have developed insulin resistance or diabetes as a result of our drugs and drinking, this can become extreme. (See H.A.L.T. below)

From here Why We Don’t Get Better Immediately: Post-acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS)

When we first get clean we often can have really strong emotional responses.. some people will also have little or no emotions. And often times people will have trouble identifying what emotions they are having and how they are feeling. For people that have really strong emotional responses this can be flipped into a good thing as people generally have a huge positive emotional response as well so if people are able to stay positively focused life can seem majical. This takes effort and work, but in all situations we choose how we percieve whats going on so reming grateful and choosing to see the good in all things is a good place to start learning how to do this.

it is a powerful thing to keep our thoughts positive and here are some threads many of us use to help us do this.
Good things about being off drugs/getting sober
Share something POSITIVE from your day!
Today I Am Thankful For... Ver. 3: Earth, Wind and Fire!

PAWS LINKS

Post Acute Withdrawal (PAW) Excerpted From “Staying Sober” By: Terence T. Gorski
Post-acute-withdrawal syndrome Wiki

Exercise and Mood

Your doing great and this gets better with time but it sure gets better when we are able to learn to control how we think and change it for the better.

Chemicals and supplements to recover from opiate addiction

Managing depressive thinking

Here is the mindfulness thread

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

Thanks NSA, I'm gonna look over all that soon but shit has gone from bad to "now I wanna blow my fuckin brains out". I just got back from visitng my fiancé and daughter and my fiancé is gonna be at detox until next Friday, then she's going to another facility for 14-28 days. This is my worst nightmare, exactly what I didn't want to happen or hear. I just want her to finish her detox and come home. I'm sure we can stay clean without her having to go for rehab. Enough shit has happened to us to keep going in the right direction. Her work isn't letting her keep her job which is a good thing cuz everyone there is drug addicts. One girl in particular she worked with is what got us on H. We were doing pills too but the H is what started everything that's happened in the past week. I think both of us getting a job to keep us busy and working towards a place of our own and doing meetings is gonna be enough. But after visiting today, my depression and stuff is through the roof. I'm not crying...yet but I will once I'm alone. I don't know what to do

 

[Eveleivibe]

NSA knows his stuff n has provided a lot of useful information there. I am vouch that those three threads for positive thinking DO help. And because other are posting they helpful for feeling part of a group of like-minded people xxxx

 

[Oxy_Ghost]

NSA knows his stuff n has provided a lot of useful information there. I am vouch that those three threads for positive thinking DO help. And because other are posting they helpful for feeling part of a group of like-minded people xxxx

Yeah I've only been in one of the positive thinkin threads, the "share something positive" thread is the only one I've been in cuz today was the first day I've had anything positive happen to me lately. But I'm checking out the dealing with depression link since I've been pretty depressed lately. From what I've read on it so far everything I've been doing is only making it worse. This is the first time I've really gone through bad depression. I've been depressed before but that was because I had my life all planned out. I was gonna join the military. I had already started my conditioning to get ready for Basic Trainning and had done all this research and stuff only to find out I have a "condition" that's automatically disqualifies me from ever joining any branch including coast guard. I was using oxycodone at the time but I was gonna give myself a while to get it out of my system so I could pass a drug test and use the 8 weeks of BMT to detox. It probably wouldn't of been a good idea to go while withdrawing haha but I would've been exercising everyday and stuff so it would've kept my mind sorta off it. But It hit me hard when I was told I would never get in because of some stupid ass fucking rule the dumb ass DoD had make up and I guess I still get depressed whenever I think about it. Cuz that's how I was gonna support my family and straighten myself out and make something of myself. Gotta go a different route now:/