So I have been really down the past couple of weeks, which is really bad because I am not working as I hard as I should and I am in sales. Not selling shit when I am supposed to really hurts my job performance. I still haven't used any illegal drugs, just my "medication." This is the longest I have gone without being institutionalized without using any illegal drugs since I started partying too much.
I miss how my life was with my wife. It seems like she is no longer in love with me and it has been really hard that I am no longer living with her. (I am working in another state but that wouldn't matter since her family hates my guts and she is being influenced very heavily from them to throw me to the curve. It's all fucked up basically.) she is basically the only thing that matters to me and I know that is not healthy to a recovering heroin addict. I am walking on very thin ice here and all I can do is think about how badly I want her but can't have her so what's the point of trying to be clean because all it does is let me feel the pain I am having.
I miss how my life was with my wife. It seems like she is no longer in love with me and it has been really hard that I am no longer living with her. (I am working in another state but that wouldn't matter since her family hates my guts and she is being influenced very heavily from them to throw me to the curve. It's all fucked up basically.) she is basically the only thing that matters to me and I know that is not healthy to a recovering heroin addict. I am walking on very thin ice here and all I can do is think about how badly I want her but can't have her so what's the point of trying to be clean because all it does is let me feel the pain I am having.