been clean for a week! but need some advice!

[outofmymind84]

ok so i have been a meth user for many years. when i was 20 yrs old i decided to go cold turkey after 6 yrs on meth because i got pregnant with my now 8 yr old daughter. well i stood clean until november 2013. so its been over a year that i been using heavily again. my boyfriend just broke up with me saying that he cant take seeing me like thi (on dope) and that hes been knowing i have been getting high regardless of my lies to him that i havent. that same day, i sat alone for hours in my room and thought about so much (especially about my baby girl) and i decided to get clean again right then and there.. so my bf moved out but says hes there for me n will help me get through this. im having a hard time but i know i can do this but im kind of fucked up over the situation with my ex. im not sure if i should let him come over and be around me still. he has spent the last 2 nights with me and has been comforting me and helping me get through these bad withdrawls, but honestly, im really confused. he told me that he does love me but not the same as before and that he wants to help me get through this. but i feel that this is gonna end up hurting me in the end and make me use again only because what if he starts talking or seeing another girl. or if he wont be able to stick with me through all this getting and staying sober situation. i love him very much but i cant help but sit here and wonder what hes doing when hes not here or be confused about if we will be again after i get through this.. i kindda feel abandoned by him cuz he just up and left and it messes with me alot! what do i do? i really need some point of views cuz im so messed up right now and i really wanna continue to be clean and not let anyone or anything get in the way of that.. he just told me today, after i asked him if we were through forever, that things change and who knows, but i dnt like that answer. it kindda upsets me.what do i do and how do i stay strong with all this shit happening while im trying to stay sober???

its all so overwhelming and confusing and hurts physically and mentally

 

[Maya]

I can definitely see that the relationship ending is making a big impact on your drug use but you have to consider that even if it ended, he is willing to help you out get through your drug addiction. This is going to be a very rough ride but you have to prove to yourself that you can get pass all of this. Pick yourself up and worry about yourself more than the ended relationship. Like what he said who knows what will happen but if he sees you clean and successful then he might come back. We dont have control over people's feelings but we can definitely have control over ourselves. The important thing is staying strong and not losing hope. Please do your best to get clean again not only for your sake but also for your child. We are here for support ♡♡♡

 

[outofmymind84]

yea i know that i have to stay strong and focus on myself til i get right. its just hard.