A flicker of an idea!
Another bar, same people - different faces.
What I want still isn't in that drink,
Who I should have been still is.
And she was pissed off that I showed up to interrupt her party with a melancholic glance toward that would-have-been face of hers.
A five-minute phone call and a month's worth of feeling, wrapped up by you and I didn't hear a word you said even though my voice had inflection at all the right moments.
Given so many smiles,
Helped all those hearts with a word,
And you never did see the part of me that should have been on the back of a motorcycle flying through stale air to nowhere.
This week left me lazy.
Last night left me bruised up,
The bleeding stopped quickly, not like the liquor still on my breath.
I can make you a god when it's four a.m., and I need something you've got that has nothing to do with who you are and everything to do with where I've been.
When you're moaning you ask fewer questions about why I didn't care about falling on that stone floor.
I wanted in.
Not knowing isn't vexing me.
Losing the ability to give a shit doesn't rob me of sleep anymore.
I'm getting better at these ups and downs because it's always easier to go sideways and avoid the main roads if pretending to not exist can get you through.
There'll be smiles enough in my next life that's always starting tomorrow.
These thoughts are getting me back.
Whispering shit in my ear working on my indifference.
Voices that sound familiar in a don't-you-have-something-important-to-say-that-can-fix-my-broken-mind way, and they're insistent enough that they make me laugh no matter how hard I fight.
So I'll listen.
Long enough to decide what difference I'll make.
I left that girl in that bar glass a long time ago.
She sends me threats disguised as love letters now and then.
There's no way for her to beat me unless I think I understand her and then she'll creep up on my vaguely-defined world of non-egos and she's won.
So I put the glass down.
And I drowned her in the pool I jumped in.
Today I'm looking down my nose at her again, but she's still sitting at that bar smiling through the pain, and I'm still numb and who's better off.
Another bar, same people - different faces.
What I want still isn't in that drink,
Who I should have been still is.
And she was pissed off that I showed up to interrupt her party with a melancholic glance toward that would-have-been face of hers.
A five-minute phone call and a month's worth of feeling, wrapped up by you and I didn't hear a word you said even though my voice had inflection at all the right moments.
Given so many smiles,
Helped all those hearts with a word,
And you never did see the part of me that should have been on the back of a motorcycle flying through stale air to nowhere.
This week left me lazy.
Last night left me bruised up,
The bleeding stopped quickly, not like the liquor still on my breath.
I can make you a god when it's four a.m., and I need something you've got that has nothing to do with who you are and everything to do with where I've been.
When you're moaning you ask fewer questions about why I didn't care about falling on that stone floor.
I wanted in.
Not knowing isn't vexing me.
Losing the ability to give a shit doesn't rob me of sleep anymore.
I'm getting better at these ups and downs because it's always easier to go sideways and avoid the main roads if pretending to not exist can get you through.
There'll be smiles enough in my next life that's always starting tomorrow.
These thoughts are getting me back.
Whispering shit in my ear working on my indifference.
Voices that sound familiar in a don't-you-have-something-important-to-say-that-can-fix-my-broken-mind way, and they're insistent enough that they make me laugh no matter how hard I fight.
So I'll listen.
Long enough to decide what difference I'll make.
I left that girl in that bar glass a long time ago.
She sends me threats disguised as love letters now and then.
There's no way for her to beat me unless I think I understand her and then she'll creep up on my vaguely-defined world of non-egos and she's won.
So I put the glass down.
And I drowned her in the pool I jumped in.
Today I'm looking down my nose at her again, but she's still sitting at that bar smiling through the pain, and I'm still numb and who's better off.
