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Bad weed experiences - can you help me?

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EmLee

Greenlighter
Joined
Aug 11, 2013
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21
Hi there, I registered on this site today so I can ask this question about my problem which has been bothering me for a long while.
I smoked weed for the first time with my boyfriend (he wasn't my boyfriend at the time) about a year and a half ago. I hadn't really done any research into the effects of cannabis so I didn't know what to expect and I was pretty excited. After a few tokes I got a really strong urge to sit down but we were outside in the snow so I told him I felt really ill and stumbled over to a bench. I must have sat there for about ten minutes, head in my hands, before I finally forced myself to get up and go inside. For the next couple of hours I just felt really disengaged, found it difficult to interact and I also experienced twitching and difficulty staying still.

A year on and I still have similar effects when I smoke, although they obviously aren't as strong. I still find it difficult to talk and when I do talk I'm so afraid that what I'm saying is somehow 'wrong' and I'm embarrassing myself. I feel like people are staring at me and sometimes I even kind of imagine that they're laughing at me. My whole body, particularly my legs, used to twitch but now I find it's mostly in my neck which I'm also very conscious of and embarrassed by when I've been smoking. Sometimes, when I have dry mouth, I imagine that my tongue is somehow getting stuck to my front teeth and I'm scared to pull it back into my mouth, even though I know it's not actually happening.

In short, smoking weed just makes me feel self-conscious, insecure, worried and anxious for the effects to wear off. I have had a few pleasant experiences where I've been really happy, most notably when I had a pot brownie, but most of the time I just feel shit. Why is it I feel like this? I wish I could enjoy smoking weed like all my friends and my boyfriend do. Please help me if you can!
 
Marijuana isn't for everyone! Don't feel bad that your friends enjoy the experience and you can't seem to find anything great about it. That's totally normal.

All my friends smoke enormous amounts of weed, and I choose not to anymore because of my similar symptoms like insecurity and anxiety. Either just take 1 or 2 hits and try to relax with music or meditation, or stop smoking weed entirely! Then you won't experience those symptoms ;)
 
albatross said:
... just take 1 or 2 hits and try to relax with music or meditation...
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^ That. I've suffered negative effects from cannabis since I was 15 (right after my 3rd or 4th time smoking), but have learned that taking smaller hits until I'm satisfied is the best way to enjoy it. Also, being alone or with a couple people I'm close to is better that being around people I think are judging me. I sometimes still take too large a hit, but it's easy to tell myself it will be over soon and to just ride it out.
 
Yeah that's all sound advice, if I just have a few tokes and don't inhale too deeply I feel pretty calm and relaxed. I just feel like I'm missing out somehow even though I know I don't really enjoy it. I mean, one day after I'd had a long day at work my boyfriend surprised me with a joint and I felt so bad saying I didn't want to cause he just thought he was doing something nice for me. Most people who smoke weed really don't understand how I can't enjoy it haha.

On a side note, are there any other drugs you'd recommend for people like us that I'd get on better with? I'm going to a festival at the end of August and tempted to give MDMA a try before I go but I'm worried it could amplify my anxiety and that. Also interested in trying ketamine. Any thoughts? :)
 
If you're going to try MDMA take at least two pills or one if they're quite strong. My friend who is very like you with weed (gets mostly bad trips) took MDMA for the first time but only took half a pill, 60mg and she also smoked one joint and just felt quite depressed and emotional. It wasn't an enjoyable experience like doing MDMA should be.

Not sure about Ketamine though. Everyone's different.
 
EmLee, When I was your age, the exact same things happened to me when I smoked cannabis. Finally, I learned to titrate my amount. Next time you have a joint, just take ONE hit. Don't hold the smoke in for a long time. Just a small hit and let it out. Then wait! At least 5 minutes. See how you feel, and if you don't feel much, just take one more small hit. Then STOP. Do it like this for a while. There is no hurry! Smoking too much cannabis at once is usually very unpleasant----especially for someone that is new to it.
I learned this the hard way. lol! Now, I know all I need is two very small/light hits and that is enough to make me feel calm, de-stressed and comfortably happy.
Everyone is different. Don't try to keep up with anyone else! You are smoking for yourself, and YOU are the one that controls how much you should smoke.
Good luck, and remember....go slow and eventually you will find the amount that makes you feel good. ;)
 
I still find it difficult to talk and when I do talk I'm so afraid that what I'm saying is somehow 'wrong' and I'm embarrassing myself. I feel like people are staring at me and sometimes I even kind of imagine that they're laughing at me. My whole body, particularly my legs, used to twitch but now I find it's mostly in my neck which I'm also very conscious of and embarrassed by when I've been smoking. Sometimes, when I have dry mouth, I imagine that my tongue is somehow getting stuck to my front teeth and I'm scared to pull it back into my mouth, even though I know it's not actually happening.
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These are super common. Just remember that pretty much nothing you think is true. You're not saying anything wrong. You are not embarrassing yourself, no one is staring at your (unless they're super stoned too). No one is laughing you (unless YOU are super stoned and even then, it's all in good fun). Oh and when you get dry mouth, just take small sips of water on a regular basis.

Thing is, you probably should just not smoke. The symptoms you don't like are never truly going to go away. Paranoia is part of getting high and usually it requires a real chill state of mind in order to get over that. Paranoia is so common that it is usually the main reason people don't smoke. It's so common it is often made fun of in movies, TV shows, etc:



About MDMA, it wont cause anxiety at the right dose. That's the point. It makes you feel awesome and one with everyone. Just don't do too much. Don't take 2 pills, take just 1. You don't want to get so fucked up that you start freaking out just because you are so fucked up. There are a lot of side-effects you should educate yourself about before you take MDMA. If you know them before hand, then it wont freak you out. Oh, if you do MDMA, do NOT smoke weed.
 
Lay off the weed. It's not for you. When I first used I didn't care about life, just having fun. It seem's that weed distresses you more then having that euphoria calming effect. If I had realized in my early teen how bad weed would be for me in the future i would of never smoked it. It throw's me into DR/DP bad. I know the feeling your talking about. Like you have something on your mind that sounds cool but if you say it people are going to take it worng. Man, I know people here can smoke and IDC. Weed is bad for some people and I don't want to see you keep doing it until it stick's even when your not high.
 
MDMA is very unlikely to make you insecure/paranoid in the way that weed does, it has its own host of issues, but making you shutdown socially and freak out about the people around you is not one of them. The only part of MDMA that would really cause anxiety is an intense come-up/peak which you can avoid by taking a sensible dose.

As for weed I used to regularly get experiences like what you described in the opening post. As I got more experienced I learned to tell what sort of situations and people would trigger that and what sort of situations and people (or lack of people) would lead to a more enjoyable high.
 
Thanks for being so helpful everyone! It's a shame there's no real way for me to enjoy smoking weed properly but I'll take all your advice into account. :) At the festival I think I'll just buy myself some hash brownies and stay away from joints/bongs as I had a really good experience when I ate one.

Onto MDMA - I've read into it a lot since posting this and think I'll be alright with it, but do you think it's a good idea to take it for the first time at a festival? My boyfriend/friends always take it in powder form and I'll have no way to measure the dose. Also, at the festival I'll be pretty much constantly drinking; should the combination of alcohol and MDMA be avoided? Could I drink during the day but ensure I'm sober before taking it?
 
Don't buy hash brownies... They will get you far more stoned and there's nothing you can do about it. You could have that crazy paranoid feelings for HOURS AND HOURS. Brownies are usually made strong as fuck. Even if they aren't you really have no idea how much THC is in them (unless they are medical) and brownies take forever to hit you. Sometimes it takes up to 2-3 hours just to start. I've seen way too many people think their brownie isn't working so they eat another one... big mistake.

MDMA should be enjoyed on its own. The feelings of pure euphoria and love for everyone are pretty much gone once your drunk. So you get all the intoxication minus the fun. You will end up doing really dumb shit while you drunk and when you sober up the next day you'll wonder why people even like molly. Seriously, alcohol is one of the least pleasurable intoxicants out there. MDMA is considered one of the most pleasurable. So drinking is what you do when you can't find any MDMA. Take the MDMA by itself and enjoy it. A festival is THE BEST place to take MDMA for your first time. The easiest way to dose powder is to find out what the weight of the whole bag is and then split it. So if you have a bag that is 1g and you are with 4 people, split it into 4 (theoretically 250mg of MDMA but most likely ~150mg). Definitely check up on erowid.org for an starting dose that YOU think is appropriate. The best way to dose an unknown amount of powder is to take small amounts at a time until you feel good. Try sucking your pinky finger to the first knuckle and sticking it into the powder, then lick/suck the powder off your finger, aka a finger dip. Either way just make sure you stay with your friends cause being alone and fucked up can scare some people. Then save your drink for the comedown. Better yet, down the molly, chuck the alcohol, and eat the brownie when the MDMA wears off.
 
I've had a hash brownie from a festival before, I only ate half as I'm very cautious about drugs etc. and didn't eat any more even though I didn't feel any effects for over an hour. When it did kick in it just made me feel really happy, giggly and then sleepy as it wore off so I'm definitely gonna buy one again.

Yeah I understand that about MDMA. I'm intending to be sober (from cannabis and alcohol) by the time I take it, I was just wondering if lightly drinking during the day would have any bad effects on my first MDMA experience. I was intending to ingest the powder rather than snort it anyway as snorting really doesn't appeal to me.

And I disagree sooo much about alcohol not being a pleasurable intoxicant! I'm sure I'm gonna enjoy MDMA, but I'm also sure after I've tried it I'll still choose alcohol over it.
 
Try to accept the fact that you are high, don't resist it. I'm convinced that most people that have bad reactions to weed are simply resisting it's effects on your mind, ease into it and fully embrace the effects, try and feel them deeply and realise you are high. This advice has already helped a few of my friends and myself to be far more comfortable with smoking.
 
And I disagree sooo much about alcohol not being a pleasurable intoxicant! I'm sure I'm gonna enjoy MDMA, but I'm also sure after I've tried it I'll still choose alcohol over it.
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Hmmm. How do you know? MDMA is pretty much bliss in a pill. Alcohol is so easy to get and so universal that people assume to much about it. The side-effects, comedown, and addiction potential are about as bad as they get with alcohol. Alcohol is great for coming down off MDMA though.
 
EmLee said:
Onto MDMA - I've read into it a lot since posting this and think I'll be alright with it, but do you think it's a good idea to take it for the first time at a festival? My boyfriend/friends always take it in powder form and I'll have no way to measure the dose. Also, at the festival I'll be pretty much constantly drinking; should the combination of alcohol and MDMA be avoided? Could I drink during the day but ensure I'm sober before taking it?
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Yes, taking it at a festival for the first time should be fine. And yea the combination should be avoided. From my own experience, if you are a fairly heavy drinker normally then you can get away with drinking lightly throughout (but not getting drunk), and if you get drunk and roll at the same time you should expect to lose large chunks of memory, act like a retard, and an overall dulling of the high
 
Same here, except my psychosis is a bit different. I smoked shit loads of bud from 14-18. I'm talking 15 bongs a day, during lunch, after school before bed, and plenty of other drugs, synthetic, coke, MDMA. Then after having a bad trip on acid at a rave, and smoking shit loads of bud right after, any time I smoked it brought the same feeling back. But I used too get the same can't speak sensation, and cotton mouth when I did smoke after the bad experience. Thank Allah I quit smoking. Quit while you can!
It's happening a lot less lately since quitting, but I get this rush through my body every once in awhile, where I feel like I'm going too die. It's hard too explain, but it almost feels like you're going too slip out of reality, while simultaneously not being able too breathe, and your body is just being ripped apart. It sounds insane, but you almost can't describe the feeling?
I quit smoking nearly a year ago, and it still happens, apparently it's life long.
 
I too wish I could smoke weed again.. I had many good times watching movies and contemplating all sorts of deep meaningful shit. but it got too paranoid for me when all I kept thinking was how the government was just one big out of control monster been used by rich elites to control society. and theres nothing no one can do. I then became delusional thinking I was the resurrection of God/jesus/holy messiah. The gay lord as opposed to the dark prince..

ITs left me far worse off than before I began smoking. Pot for the potty
 
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