megusta4217
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Dec 6, 2013
- Messages
- 1
Well first off a little background information on myself. I'm 17 and have suffered from moderate anxiety and depression my entire life. I am very much anti social. I smoked weed heavily for about 4-5 months before my lsd experience. My regular dealer had 2 tabs that looked to good to pass up. My best friend told me how great tripping was (he had tripped 2 times prior, and even plans to do more soon). I was having pretty bad anxiety before taking it but my friend convinced me to go for a walk for him and we would take it at the end of the walk. After the walk I was still unsure but my friend told me to just take it and that I would enjoy it. I think he popped it first so I felt obliged to do it. We continued the walk back to my house about 10 minutes and it was slowly kicking in. I was still a bit shaky but I felt as if the beginning feeling of the lsd made me ready. I remember how confused I was. At about 20-30 minutes in we decided to pick up our friend to smoke with. We came back to my house and sat in the drive way and hot boxed my car. At that point it started kicking in. I had minor visuals, the bushes infront of my house started to twist together.
I stopped smoking because I thought I was good. It didn't really do much until we went inside where we watched tv. I started to zone out and I noticed bright purple along the corner of the wall and the tv was bright as fuck. I started feeling panicky and left them and went for a walk by myself because I didn't want tot explain to them I was having bad anxiety. I didn't really see anything and that was an hour in. I came back to the house after 5 minutes and convinced them to come for a walk with me. We walked down the road to the intercostal waterway where there was a dock and gazebo over the water. I remember feeling as I recall "majestic as fuck" because it was raining and I had some euphoria. While standing on the gazebo that's where it peaked for me. I saw like purple and blue hexagons in my vision. I looked out over the water and this loud white noise clouded my hearing. It was pouring rain at this point. I remember the water started to look cartoon like and I saw the water go into huge 30 foot or so waves bouncing up and down and my vision pulled out and turned. After that I returned to some consciousness. I spent the rest of the trip not really seeing anything but a bit of zooming in and out. The rest felt like pure anxiety.
For the next several months I have been able to smoke fine but recently its been giving me bad panic attacks. The feeling weed seems to give me reminds me a lot of lsd, so I just stay away from it now. I don't drink either because I'm scared it will throw me into a panic attack. I've managed to subdue the anxiety a bit but the depression is there. That may be the quitting smoking thing though so I don't stress that on the lsd too much. I always get this feeling lsd ruined my life. I told my therapist about my experience and he told me in what way has it ruined your life? Believe it or not I couldn't really answer that question. It just stays in my head and my negative thoughts will get to me that at any point in time I will have an acid flashback. I've never experience one and I have no idea what its like. I feel as if at any point in time I going to lose control of reality and I wont be able to return. From what I researched and talked about, it just doesn't work that way. My anxiety and negative thoughts like to toss me around a fuck me over. I feel so overwhelmed I'm just looking for some relief from this stress im having. I want to stop worrying about it and focus on the actual shit that's going on in my life instead of something that isn't going to happen.
I stopped smoking because I thought I was good. It didn't really do much until we went inside where we watched tv. I started to zone out and I noticed bright purple along the corner of the wall and the tv was bright as fuck. I started feeling panicky and left them and went for a walk by myself because I didn't want tot explain to them I was having bad anxiety. I didn't really see anything and that was an hour in. I came back to the house after 5 minutes and convinced them to come for a walk with me. We walked down the road to the intercostal waterway where there was a dock and gazebo over the water. I remember feeling as I recall "majestic as fuck" because it was raining and I had some euphoria. While standing on the gazebo that's where it peaked for me. I saw like purple and blue hexagons in my vision. I looked out over the water and this loud white noise clouded my hearing. It was pouring rain at this point. I remember the water started to look cartoon like and I saw the water go into huge 30 foot or so waves bouncing up and down and my vision pulled out and turned. After that I returned to some consciousness. I spent the rest of the trip not really seeing anything but a bit of zooming in and out. The rest felt like pure anxiety.
For the next several months I have been able to smoke fine but recently its been giving me bad panic attacks. The feeling weed seems to give me reminds me a lot of lsd, so I just stay away from it now. I don't drink either because I'm scared it will throw me into a panic attack. I've managed to subdue the anxiety a bit but the depression is there. That may be the quitting smoking thing though so I don't stress that on the lsd too much. I always get this feeling lsd ruined my life. I told my therapist about my experience and he told me in what way has it ruined your life? Believe it or not I couldn't really answer that question. It just stays in my head and my negative thoughts will get to me that at any point in time I will have an acid flashback. I've never experience one and I have no idea what its like. I feel as if at any point in time I going to lose control of reality and I wont be able to return. From what I researched and talked about, it just doesn't work that way. My anxiety and negative thoughts like to toss me around a fuck me over. I feel so overwhelmed I'm just looking for some relief from this stress im having. I want to stop worrying about it and focus on the actual shit that's going on in my life instead of something that isn't going to happen.
