Attempting Iambic Villanelle

[psycosynthesis]

There’s a certain absent aspect of you
which I have not quite comprehended yet.
Brush it away and let the light shine through.

Each dawn exerted to divine your mood,
smiling hands on my skin and I forget
there’s a certain absent aspect of you.

A relaxing, relapsing tactile view
of fingers tracing roadmaps in my sweat,
brush it aside and let the light shine through.

Long nights spent in stoned complacence, but who
we were was a lost, discarded concept.
There’s a certain absent aspect of you.

Withdrawing from you I’m cold-turkey blue
shivering and puking like when we met.
Brush it away and let the light shine through.

Regenerating you I start anew,
laying foundations for future neglect
there’s a certain absent aspect of you.
Brush it away and let the light shine through.

 

[(Wordy)]

Great stuff!

The villanelle is probably my favourite when it comes to traditional poetic forms, and you've observed the form beautifully - exploiting it to your advantage rather than letting the form dictate proceedings.

The only thing that didn't quite work for me was the flow between the second and third lines of the final stanza.

 

[Jabberwocky]

I liked this poem technically. Its not often that you see this style. Thanks for sharing.