Asking parents about social anxiety meds....help please

[awkwardchild]

First off sorry if this is the wrong section. It seems to have the most relevance, though.

Ok so im a guy in highschool and I have pretty bad social anxiety. For example a few times I have been called to read aloud in class and Ill try to describe what happens the best I can here;

As soon as im called on, I feel my heart pumping 100x. I feel the blood rush through my head and clog up my throat, my wind pipe is significantly diminished and im practically gasping for air. Its like I just sprinted around a track 5 times. I start stuttering and shits going bad. its incredibly embarrasing. Sometimes I have to hold back tears.

And while Im "reading" aloud, Im not even paying attention to the words, Im on complete autopilot. Im just thinking to myself "this cannot be happening. please, please wake up"

Im wondering how to talk to my parents about this? If i asked them about asking a doctor for anti anxiety meds, my mother would probably first off be surprised and angry at how awkward i am, and then go "*sigh* just stop being so shy..."

any advice? School is like living hell sometimes because of this.

 

[xstayfadedx]

I would just truly tell them how you feel. If you really think they will just tell you to stop worrying and its no big deal then why don't you meet with your doctor first. You can tell your doctor what's up and make some sort of plan then it will be easier to talk to your parents. Trust me my mother is the same way but sooner or later they will get the drift.

Your doctor might be reluctant to put you on benzos and what not and may try an antidepressant first. She/he might also refer you to a psychiatrist so they can prescribe you the appropriate prescription.

 

[purplelights]

Tell your parents exactly what you said here. Be completely honest about your feelings. I know how you feel because I used to have social anxiety as well. I didn't get medication for it though, instead I went through counseling and it helped a TON. Since you're young I would definitely ask your doctor to try counseling first because medication is not a good long-term solution; counseling can help you get to the root of the problem and therefore help you out more in the long run. Good luck with everything

 

[STiLife]

ive been going through this my whole life. Doctor will be quite reluctant at first to give you benzos, will def start you on an ssri regiemnt first. Depending on your age he may give you a very low dose of benzos but unlikely. If you do get perscribed benzos please do not abuse them you will head down a hellish road that i had to experience the hard way. I doubt your parents wont be understanding. Just explain to them exactly how you feel. Counseling is a must, you may think it doesnt help at all at first but it really does in the end. Ive been through 5 therapists and i finally found the right one. You just really need to find one that you feel very confortable around and open to. hang in there your not the only one

 

[mgmt&mdma]

i know how you feel haha

when i get called on to read i blush and freak out and like yell the chapter/whatever i have to read, it suuuucks IMO this happens to most people, just seems like stage fright.

when else does this happen?

 

[Captain.Heroin]

What you described sounds similar to what people call anxiety attacks or panic attacks. However it sounds really intense as I normally do not have completely overwhelming anxiety like this very often.

I would just ask to go to the doctor or a specific doctor of your choosing. I don't think your parents will ask many questions unless they are concerned about you, in which case just tell them the truth. If you're not sure if they would approve you going to see a psychologist/psychiatrist, then try to see if a friend can take you.

If you have health insurance, you shouldn't have too much of a hard time coming up with a deductible.

Since you are already posting a thread about this - can you talk to someone 1 on 1 without this happening? Are you slightly anxious when you just talk to one person, what about if other people are in the room but only 1 or 2 people can hear you talk?

 

[chitown rollin]

you're a perfect candidate for some anti-anxiety meds. shit I got a xanax script without having any real anxiety (kinda tricked myself into thinking I was anxious to rationalize having the presciption). I would tell your parents exactly what you said in here, or if you don't feel comfortable just tell them you're having a hard time in school and want to see a psychiatrist. at the psychiatrist you can tell them what is going on and they are not allowed to tell your parents. hope this helps.

 

[Voxide]

Do not go the drug route without trying therapy or counseling.

You're still a kiddy. If you get used to solving your problems with a pill this early on, chances are you will never learn to effectively cope with natural human emotions; which in turn makes total pussies out of otherwise normal and healthy people.

 

[awkwardchild]

What you described sounds similar to what people call anxiety attacks or panic attacks. However it sounds really intense as I normally do not have completely overwhelming anxiety like this very often.

I would just ask to go to the doctor or a specific doctor of your choosing. I don't think your parents will ask many questions unless they are concerned about you, in which case just tell them the truth. If you're not sure if they would approve you going to see a psychologist/psychiatrist, then try to see if a friend can take you.

If you have health insurance, you shouldn't have too much of a hard time coming up with a deductible.

Since you are already posting a thread about this - can you talk to someone 1 on 1 without this happening? Are you slightly anxious when you just talk to one person, what about if other people are in the room but only 1 or 2 people can hear you talk?

1 on 1 im usually fine. sometimes i get a little nervous if its a pretty girl, haha. But usually im fine in small groups. Its just that when the spotlight is on me to read in class, everything is silent except for me, having to read aloud to 20 others. I think that environment is what creates the problem.

Do not go the drug route without trying therapy or counseling.

You're still a kiddy. If you get used to solving your problems with a pill this early on, chances are you will never learn to effectively cope with natural human emotions; which in turn makes total pussies out of otherwise normal and healthy people.

ya, i know they have a high potential for abuse. I know the pill isnt a magic solution, its just a means to cope with the problem. Im hoping to do some kind of toastmasters club or something in college to work on public speaking and hopefully overcome social anxiety.


thanks for all the replies.

 

[arctica]

Inderal (Propranolol) is a beta blocker that a lot of people find really effective for stage fright and public speaking anxiety. It's non-addictive, unlike the benzos. It helps slow down your heart rate and lowers your blood pressure, and helps with hand tremor/shakiness. It might be a good option for you if you're worried about becoming addicted to benzos and/or your doctor is reluctant to prescribe them for you.

 

[awkwardchild]

Inderal (Propranolol) is a beta blocker that a lot of people find really effective for stage fright and public speaking anxiety. It's non-addictive, unlike the benzos. It helps slow down your heart rate and lowers your blood pressure, and helps with hand tremor/shakiness. It might be a good option for you if you're worried about becoming addicted to benzos and/or your doctor is reluctant to prescribe them for you.

I really doubt i would become addicted, its mainly up to what my doctor would allow. Id like the strongest stuff available but i doubt he would let me get that

 

[Jabberwocky]

I really doubt i would become addicted, its mainly up to what my doctor would allow. Id like the strongest stuff available but i doubt he would let me get that

addiction can really creep up on you. and even if you were right about you not getting addicted...physically your body can get addicted and that is something you cannot control.

 

[STiLife]

do you have any drug history? i took the usual dose of benzos perscribed to me for a year then it went all down hill from there once my body got used to them. Try your hardest not to go down the benzo route...

 

[whippa craka]

It's all in your head man. I used to have the same problem and it took some mental beatings to get the anxiety out of me. I'm sure your a very nice guy, and girl you talk with is nothing more then a 'best friend'. Basically, as harsh as it is, you need to start man'ing up and stop caring so much about what everybody thinks about you. I know I am shooting assumptions, but 90% of the time this is where the problem lies. All in all, stop being a pussy.

Hate to be a jerk but its lines like this (except told to you in person) that it takes to change.

 

[Bojangles69]

The majority of the symptoms you mentioned are the same exact symptoms I use to get. Your heart starts racing, your mind becomes aware, it feedsback into your biology activating even more, and just keeps spiraling out of control.

Panic attacks are caused by an overresponding adrenal system. What you're describing sounds exactly like that. I would not mess with xanax because I believe it won't be nearly as effective as inderal would in your situation. Inderal blocks adrenaline, xanax does not. Therefore you can still get panic attacks on xanax, on inderal you can't. Its biologically impossible. You can get anxious in your head, but your body will remain 100% calm. And since its your body that your mind is reacting to, GET INDERAL.

I went through the same bs you did for years and years and years. Used countless meds, ssris, benzos, that did very little. You have described a very common problem with a very common solution. I'm telling you there are xanax heads in here you like what it does to their brain and will recommend it to you for only that reason. But xanax is not what you need based on what you described. You need a beta blocker.

My parents never believed me, my friends always use to just say "just pretend everyones naked". It wasn't till I tried killing myself that people began to take my public speaking problem more seriously. It dealt with that shit for years. Running out of rooms right before I had to speak, not showing up for class, etc etc. Now I ALWAYS keep a bottle of inderal in my possession. And I have not once had that experience you described happen again. Like I said it puts the ultimate breaks on your adrenaline. No racing heart, no stuttering, no twitching/shaking knees or hands, no blushing, no cracking of your voice, and no mind to observe all this crap and just make it worse.

Please trust me when I say what you described is a CARBON COPY of what I had to go through too. And I can also explain biologically why this system exists in certain people and not others. But that doesn't matter. Inderal is easy to get and any doctor will prescribe it. 60-80mg is usually the "shut off" dose for most people. Sometimes drs will prescribe 10-20mg which is usually not enough so keep that in mind. But I'm telling you public speaking for me or speaking in a social setting in general when from the most frightening nightmare of an experience you could imagine, to something I almost enjoy doing now thanks to the inderal. And the only reason I enjoy it now is due to how surreal it feels to have been able to piece that logic together.

Its all about adrenaline with what you mentioned, take xanax and you'll like it, but its still not going to fix what you wrote. Because depressing your CNS is not the key, blocking adrenaline is. I'm telling you get some inderal in your blood and try to give a speech again, you'll be worried initially (anticipatory anxiety) but once you notice your body is simply not responding any more I'm telling you giving speeches will feel like just talking to your brother or sister.

And no I'm not saying this works for everyone. I'm saying for WHAT YOU WROTE, I'm more than positive this will work for you.
Other people are just insecure and its all in their head, their heart doesn't race and all that they just psych themselves out, those are the types that need xanax. When your brain is reacting merely to your body, thats when you need inderal.

G/luck!

 

[CheapHighMan]

You can also try some minor OTC solutions. Solutions is probably the wrong word for these because these are no were as near as useful as real prescription drugs but they are a good temporary fix while you are trying to work this out.

Heres a list of good things to help you cope with anxiety. They are all non addictive.

Benadryl (diphenhydramine)
Valerian Root
5-htp (don't take with ssri)
Hops
Skullcap
Kava (closest thing to a natural benzo you will find. Also a minor maoi antidepressant very useful)

Thats all I can think of off the top of my head. I used to have pretty bad social anxiety but somehow I got over it. Try and get your confidence up and that may help. Hope these help!

 

[Bojangles69]

Oh btw I've tried every herb on that list /\ and some are effective but like you said not nearly as useful as prescription drugs.

2 things that come very close to prescription drugs and are all natural are:
kanna
and a supplement called "psychotropin". It is like no antianxiety supplement I've ever taken before. Genuinely felt like a xanax first time I took it I was amazed.

And kanna is even stronger. The problem with kanna however is finding decent grade leaf as the majority of what commerical places are selling is not even the correct strain.
But if you find the right strain of kanna, and its quality/matured leaf, it will obliterate anxiety like no other med/herb you've experienced. Kanna is a very trick herb though and you need to do tons of research on it imo before you use it.

If you're not beat for all that bs then just pick up a bottle of OTC psychotropin, I absolutely vouch for what it does. It has l-theanine in it, and some l-theanine complexes are good, but psychotropin is in its own little league. Made with a very intelligent and synergistic mix of herbs that can actually be felt profoundly when taken, unlike herbs like kava kava that for the most part are just really weak imo.

 

[ocean]

Any update?

 

[awkwardchild]

Any update?

hey guys.

basically im trying to just deal with it, i dont even have 2 months left until school gets out for the summer. im trying to activate "dont give a fuck" mode. and then when september comes around, that will be my senior year. so hopefully i will not care even less by then

 

[freedomchild]

Psychiatrists have anxiety/depression quotient tests in a scantron format and/or computer/digital. Asks your parents to take you there to get evaluated for anxiety and depression via this method. It will also test for personality issues and major mental illnesses.

Easy peasy!

Good luck and more good luck.