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Ask Out Dental Receptionist?

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Teedman36

Greenlighter
Joined
Jun 12, 2014
Messages
5
There is a girl that I want to ask out, but I wanted to get some advice first. The problem is that she is a receptionist when I go for dental work. I am getting braces, so I am in there a lot lately. We have talked from time to time about personal things, and flirted a bit with each other. I was in yesterday, and I was signing in and when I said something funny she touched my arm. Later she walked past me and touched my shoulder. She twirls her hair when we talk, and she leans in to me letting me know she's engaged in the conversation. She has never mentioned a boyfriend, and when she talks about doing things it's either by herself or with friends.

The other problem is that I'm in the final stages of a dissolution of my marriage. We have filed and are just waiting on a court date. The girl I'm interested in knows this (it happened to come up in conversation once), and she seems to have no problem with it.

So my question...should I as her out? My real hang up is that I've never asked a girl out that I have a professional relationship with, and wonder if that's a good idea. I would wait until my braces were done, but I don't want to miss out or wait to long to make my move! Also and advice on how to appropriately ask her is welcomed as well.
 
Is she "in your league"?

If so, go for it.

If not, no.

Are you sexually attractive/physically fit? Or do you have a lot of dough? If you answered yes to one or both of these questions, you should have no trouble. For better or worse, what often makes or breaks "appropriateness" is whether or not you are seen as a suitable mate.

The question I have is "why her"? Is she that amazing? Or simply an attractive girl you encountered in your routine and then started to fantasize about? Your topic kind of hints at desperation, but there's always a possibility that you are well-adjusted, and just happened to chance into meeting a girl "you had to have" while getting your braces.

I wouldn't put a ton of emphasis on here personable attitude. It's certainly not a negative, but she is paid to be a receptionist, and you are paying for braces at that business.

If she's in your league, go for it!
 
You don't have a professional relationship with her though. You're not the dentist.

I just came home from a haircut, had the same woman twice in a row now. Today the conversation somehow wandered into japanese porn and whether I had a girlfriend of not. I'm not sure her age, but I think a good 10 years older than me at 31. I should have asked her for her number this time, but there will be a next. Plus I do have this one girl I'm kinda seeing right now and want to see where it goes. Also, she has a kid, age 11 I think. It would be a first for me for an age difference that wide, but she has very youthful looks and energy. Next time I'm going for it.

Simply ask her "are you doing anything after work? Wanna go __________?" There's nothing wrong with that, no lines crossed.
 
If it was the actual dentist, then you'd have to be more careful. But the receptionist? I think you're fine there. Go for it!
 
Thanks to everyone that responded. After reading Corazon's response I've decide to not ask her.
 
don't fuck where you eat... or something. i wouldn't do it, if it backfires going to the dentist could get weird. i don't know where you live but if the population is at least say 60,000 in your town there's other girls you could go for.
 
I know you said you decided not to ask her, but I think that may be a mistake.

If she's been flirting with you, and it sounds like she has, I would ask her to something definite and safe. Example: "Hey, do you want to have lunch with me tomorrow?" Then wait for her response. If she says, "I can't tomorrow," or "I wish I could but I have to do [activity]" and leaves it at that, it's a polite "no." If she says, "I can't tomorrow but what about doing something after work on Friday?" that means she wants to go out with you. And, of course, she could say yes to the lunch or coffee or whatever you propose. Just make sure you propose a specific day and time - that gives her an easy way out with no pressure. And also make it clear from your response, if she does say no either outright or via a polite "I can't tomorrow" answer with no counter-offer, that you are not hurt in any way. Just be warm and friendly, smile, and tell her, "OK, see you next time." You have nothing to lose. :D
 
^you do have something to lose, it could make things awkward at the dentists office. not that that's a big deal, it's just that you could go for a girl that you truly have NOTHING to lose except a rejection.

here's a list of people i won't fuck:
people at work
people at the apartment complex
room mates
people i'm taking a class with

basically if they're people i see everyday or whatnot i won't bang them. it's not worth it. i would add someone at the dentists office to this list.

what is so special about her?
 
Since people have asked about what's so special about her, I'll answer. Because she seems cool and I'd like to get to know her. Not sure what other reason I need. In fact, any reason outside of that would put her on a pedestal, which is not something I want to do.
Honestly, I think I'm taking her behavior the wrong way. She is paid to be nice and pleasent.

Don't really agree with the fuck where you eat in this situation; I wouldn't have to see her if I didn't want to.
Regardless, every time I think of approaching her it feels creepy. If it feels creepy to me, it will certainly be creepy to her.
 
she's not a co-worker - she's a dental receptionist. best case? you meet the love of your life. worst case? a visit to the dentist every 6 months is little awkward. even worst case? you have to consider finding a new dentist.

you have little to lose and everything to gain - why wouldn't you ask her out?

alasdair
 
If she touches your arm and twirls her hair and stuff, then it has nothing to do with "being nice" in a professional way. You can be pretty sure she likes you.
Also, Carazon may be very young. I don't think adults think like that. I'm not american, but still....
 
To be honest, I'm surprised anyone listened to Carazon's response. It is hardly the thought process you should go through.

You hardly know her, so you don't even know if she's "special" (although I'm sure she is in her own way) but who cares that you don't know that yet. You have nothing to lose. If she's mature, then it wouldn't even be awkward if she said no. Because that's how adults handle things.
 
Sounds like you really have nothing to lose, and what you explained are all signs that she digs you. Why not? If she matches your standards then go for it. Let us know what happens
 
Alright, I'll ask her. I don't see her again until the 24th, so I'll ask her then. Would rather do it in person than over the phone. Will let you know how it goes!!
 
Right on man :) that'll be dope. Look forward to hearing how it goes. You and this chick could end up having a really cool relationship, sure opens the door to cool new experiences
 
UPDATE: So, I saw the girl this morning. We were chatting it up at the counter, and I seemed to be getting the same green light signals that I got last time. So, I asked her. She said that she was happy I asked, but she had a boyfriend. I told her, that I understood and that it was no problem. We seemed to handle it like adults.
Later on, however, I got a different vibe. I went up to the counter to reschedule, and she said that someone else would be helping me with that. She got up and left the desk, and someone else came out to help me. Ok...that was different.
Indecently, this conversation got me thinking about asking out a girl that works at a local coffee house that I go to from time to time. Was the same story as above. Lesson learned? Don't shit where you eat. I think whoever said that above was right about that. I think when it comes to coworkers, people that live at my apartment complex, people in retail/receptionist/bank tellers, etc. those folks are off limits. Don't read anger or bitterness into that; I'm ok with what happened in both instances. Rejection is your friend! Just makes things awkward in the end, and it's not worth it.
 
I think it's great you asked her out. It's her problem that she felt awkward, not yours. You did nothing wrong. She should feel flattered. And it could be in your head, or maybe she likes you and your asking her out turned something in her head to something she had to deal with in real life. Like perhaps she's not happy with her bf and your offer brought that to the forefront of her mind. It's not worth making assumptions. As long as you made it easy for her to say no without your seeming hurt or angry, you did it right.

You only live once. Ask out every woman who gives you this vibe, regardless of where they are in your life, and you will do well. Go for what you want, just be cool about it. (Maybe for someone you see every day such as co-workers or apartment neighbors, only do it if there's a strong vibe and be friends with them first.)

And thanks for posting the update!
 
Johnny1 said:
I think it's great you asked her out. It's her problem that she felt awkward, not yours. You did nothing wrong. She should feel flattered. And it could be in your head, or maybe she likes you and your asking her out turned something in her head to something she had to deal with in real life. Like perhaps she's not happy with her bf and your offer brought that to the forefront of her mind. It's not worth making assumptions. As long as you made it easy for her to say no without your seeming hurt or angry, you did it right.

You only live once. Ask out every woman who gives you this vibe, regardless of where they are in your life, and you will do well. Go for what you want, just be cool about it. (Maybe for someone you see every day such as co-workers or apartment neighbors, only do it if there's a strong vibe and be friends with them first.)

And thanks for posting the update!
Click to expand...

good advice
 
This can happen. I tried it with someone who was married not too long ago. I then asked if we should have an affair, and then it was just no-no-no all of a sudden. Sucks
 
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