AddictedSince11
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Jan 6, 2026
- Messages
- 88
I was bored out of my fucking mind with absolutely nothing to do and zero drugs anywhere. No plugs, no prescriptions, no stash, nothing. Just me, withdrawal-level boredom, and a medicine cabinet I’d already checked a hundred times.
Out of pure desperation, I dig around again and find some old 15 mg aripiprazole tablets shoved way in the back. Brain instantly latches onto the fact that it’s a partial dopamine agonist. That’s all it takes.
I crush up five pills and rail them.
Fully expecting it to burn like hell or at least feel wrong, but nope — nothing. Smooth as fuck. Honestly felt like snorting powdered candy. When it dripped, it tasted weirdly sweet, almost cotton-candy-ish. No clue why. Maybe because it was my prescription when I was a kid and they used some sweet binder or some bullshit. Either way, way too pleasant for something I probably shouldn’t be doing.
About a minute later I feel a slight lift. Nothing crazy, but enough to notice. Could be placebo, but it scratches the itch just enough to make me want more.
Five minutes in and I’m still feeling alright. Waiting. Watching the clock. Trying to convince myself it’s building.
Ten minutes total and I say fuck it — crush and snort two more pills. 105 mg now. Still zero burn, zero resistance. Too easy.
At fifteen minutes I’m actually feeling pretty decent. There’s a light buzz, kind of floaty. Not stimulated, not sedated — just up. Feels like being at a rave without the noise or people.
Twenty minutes in I’m hovering right under euphoria. That annoying almost-there feeling. Still questioning placebo, but also very aware that I wouldn’t feel like this sober.
Thirty minutes hits and I bump three more pills, putting me at around 150 mg. Now I feel fucking great. Not coke, not meth, nothing manic — just warm, content, satisfied. The craving shuts up for a second. I feel “good enough,” which honestly is the goal. I think about grabbing a drink but catch myself.
By forty minutes I decide to stop pushing it and save the rest for later. No need to get stupid with interactions.
About an hour in, this feels like the peak. Still feeling good, mentally lifted, calm. Nothing dramatic happens after that. Hard to tell how much was placebo and how much was real, but it definitely wasn’t nothing.
Out of pure desperation, I dig around again and find some old 15 mg aripiprazole tablets shoved way in the back. Brain instantly latches onto the fact that it’s a partial dopamine agonist. That’s all it takes.
I crush up five pills and rail them.
Fully expecting it to burn like hell or at least feel wrong, but nope — nothing. Smooth as fuck. Honestly felt like snorting powdered candy. When it dripped, it tasted weirdly sweet, almost cotton-candy-ish. No clue why. Maybe because it was my prescription when I was a kid and they used some sweet binder or some bullshit. Either way, way too pleasant for something I probably shouldn’t be doing.
About a minute later I feel a slight lift. Nothing crazy, but enough to notice. Could be placebo, but it scratches the itch just enough to make me want more.
Five minutes in and I’m still feeling alright. Waiting. Watching the clock. Trying to convince myself it’s building.
Ten minutes total and I say fuck it — crush and snort two more pills. 105 mg now. Still zero burn, zero resistance. Too easy.
At fifteen minutes I’m actually feeling pretty decent. There’s a light buzz, kind of floaty. Not stimulated, not sedated — just up. Feels like being at a rave without the noise or people.
Twenty minutes in I’m hovering right under euphoria. That annoying almost-there feeling. Still questioning placebo, but also very aware that I wouldn’t feel like this sober.
Thirty minutes hits and I bump three more pills, putting me at around 150 mg. Now I feel fucking great. Not coke, not meth, nothing manic — just warm, content, satisfied. The craving shuts up for a second. I feel “good enough,” which honestly is the goal. I think about grabbing a drink but catch myself.
By forty minutes I decide to stop pushing it and save the rest for later. No need to get stupid with interactions.
About an hour in, this feels like the peak. Still feeling good, mentally lifted, calm. Nothing dramatic happens after that. Hard to tell how much was placebo and how much was real, but it definitely wasn’t nothing.
