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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

are you a giver or a taker

dawkins lol


girlthing detests the guy, its not hard to sympathise either - for me he is as just as extremist as the fundi religious folk. his type always remind me of the war & peace passage;

who art thou? what art thou? thou dost imagine thyself a wise man because thou could'st utter those blasphemous words, while thou art more foolish and artless than a little babe playing with the parts of a cunningly-fashioned watch - and, because he does not understand its use, dares to say he does not believe in the master who made it



fuck dawkins %)
 
Hmm, 'twould seem I've started a debate I can't really contribute to with any authority because I can remember fuck all from my course!

So apologies to BHM for derailing the thread and congratulations for being a nice chap and making that girl's day :D
 
I concur on Dawkins re: religious stuffs. He's a bit of an arse in that regard and his arguments are simply abysmal. He's the only one of the "celebrity atheists" who even I regard as losing more or less every debate he's had with religees on the subject. Will say that he was maybe a necessary agent provocateur in bringing the debate to the masses a while back but he really does need to take a step back from it all. Or at least get some decent arguments.

As a biologist he is outstanding though. Which is what we're staying scrupulously on-topic discussing here.

Oh, and in qualifications to debate news, erm... I have a GCSE in psychology. Does that count? :D
 
Hmm avoiding all this intellectual chat, yes I like to pay girls compliments, mainly cuz I think it increases my chances of getting laid from never to once in a blue moon =D

The last one I can remember was a waitress in nandos who had a very cool tattoo
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
dawkins lol


girlthing detests the guy, its not hard to sympathise either - for me he is as just as extremist as the fundi religious folk. his type always remind me of the war & peace passage;

who art thou? what art thou? thou dost imagine thyself a wise man because thou could'st utter those blasphemous words, while thou art more foolish and artless than a little babe playing with the parts of a cunningly-fashioned watch - and, because he does not understand its use, dares to say he does not believe in the master who made it



fuck dawkins %)
Click to expand...

That's a very appropriate quote considering Dawkins wrote 'The Blind Watchmaker'. Was that intentional or a lucky coincidence? ;)

Regarding Dawkins' views on religion.. Ok, he may be a little too outspoken in his views (which always tends to be detrimental to credibility), but I really can't fault his sentiments..
 
I'm pretty sure I've never told a random stranger that they had nice eyes, or anything, but I often tell people I they have awesome music taste (due to wearing a band t-shirt) or compliment their outfits.. I love it when people do the same, especially when I can tell there's no pervy agenda and it's just friendly chat.

The more strangers that talk to each other, the better. Lack of friendliness is something that's been massively bugging me about England lately. :/
 
music tshirts and the like is kind of different.. though i do remember - having seen a teenybopper wearing an abbey road beatles bag, asking if it was her favourite album ..and getting a nonplussed look in return



musical tsirts/fellow niche affiliations aside... most of the time a guy gives a girl a compliment, its probably got some sort of ulterior motive attached one way or another
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
music tshirts and the like is kind of different.. though i do remember - having seen a teenybopper wearing an abbey road beatles bag, asking if it was her favourite album ..and getting a nonplussed look in return
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Hah, yeah. I was wearing a Kyuss t-shirt at a hipster night and some girl asked me what it meant.

BlindHelperMonkey said:
musical tsirts/fellow niche affiliations aside... most of the time a guy gives a girl a compliment, its probably got some sort of ulterior motive attached one way or another
Click to expand...
That's pretty depressing. Why can't people talk to each other without having some sort of sex agenda?
 
I don't mind the throwing the odd compliment out or strike up conversations with interesting strangers, it gets tough when they assume you are hitting on them though. The thing is I never am, my wandering eye was poked out the day I met my partner and but it still insults me when I get brushed off with, " I have a boyfriend"

Well if you weren't such a sour mardy bitch you would probably have a husband by now.....
 
I do this all the time, if I see someone looking particularly good, I think they should know it! But I've no filter and no shame =D
 
On-topic (sorry about that! hah)

I love giving unsolicited compliments to my friends and to strangers, both male and female, which are sometimes quite strong and out of the blue, but there's a fine line between saying something that has a positive impact on someone's mood, and saying something a little creepy or OTT, especially with strangers. Sometimes what feels like a well-calculated and appropriate gesture can backfire. Definitely works, though, when it's done right!
 
^

yeah, id hazzard a guess that the line could be fairly safely delineated between physical/non phsyical compliments. for example, praising a girls' shoes is much less likely to be considered creepy/inappropriate than doing the same for makeup, bodyshape et al. i think hair could be considered in the 'safe' group also, despite the fact it is a physical trait - it is subject to change and in my experience, everyone and girls especially enjoy having their new-doo positively commented upon.. yes, even if you cant tell a difference - act like you can ;)
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
yeah, id hazzard a guess that the line could be fairly safely delineated between physical/non phsyical compliments. for example, praising a girls' shoes is much less likely to be considered creepy/inappropriate than doing the same for makeup, bodyshape et al. i think hair could be considered in the 'safe' group also, despite the fact it is a physical trait - it is subject to change and in my experience, everyone and girls especially enjoy having their new-doo positively commented upon.. yes, even if you cant tell a difference - act like you can ;)
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Yup - spot on. "Hey, great shoes!" is pretty different to "Hey, nice tits!"
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
^

ornithologists aside
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Haha!

You make a very good observation about physical vs. dress. I hadn't really considered the amount of difference there is, I quite like the psychology of that - make it about the 'thing' and not the person, and you're complimenting their choices, rather than what they are. Good one :)

Something I always find quite difficult to negotiate, socially, is that when I'm talking to a girl, I feel annoyed at my libido for interrupting my normal conversational style with flirtation, almost like I'm fighting against my own basic intentions. Sometimes I can just reel it in completely and I've always tried to talk to everyone as 'an individual,' but I'm very conscious of the fact that even though I don't mean to, if I find someone attractive I act slightly differently towards them. I think we all do it... some people seem more aware of it than others, for me it's an internal conflict. Consequently I have a lot of very attractive female friends, but I'm still single. lol.
 
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^

no offence intended. but maybe you should listen to that little caveman voice more. women say different things than they mean all the time - i want a man who is my bestfriend, is one


if its a mate of yours who just happens to be a girl, then by all means just talk normally with them - but if its a girl youre hot for, make sure she knows it. its this 'friendzone' schtick, actually has some truth to it. girls have instinctive desires just like us - they have their little voices too - but theirs is usually in absolutes.. once theyve decided youre not partner-material, thats usually how it remains


if its a stranger you probably wont ever see them again anyway, right? i know my o.p doesnt really support this, but fuck it
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
^

no offence intended. but maybe you should listen to that little caveman voice more. women say different things than they mean all the time - i want a man who is my bestfriend, is one
once theyve decided youre not partner-material, thats usually how it remains
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Word. I've started to realise that the caveman needs to be heard. I appreciate your advice, BHM :)
 
BlindHelperMonkey said:
^

no offence intended. but maybe you should listen to that little caveman voice more. women say different things than they mean all the time - i want a man who is my bestfriend, is one


if its a mate of yours who just happens to be a girl, then by all means just talk normally with them - but if its a girl youre hot for, make sure she knows it. its this 'friendzone' schtick, actually has some truth to it. girls have instinctive desires just like us - they have their little voices too - but theirs is usually in absolutes.. once theyve decided youre not partner-material, thats usually how it remains


if its a stranger you probably wont ever see them again anyway, right? i know my o.p doesnt really support this, but fuck it
Click to expand...

I agree with all of that except the girls 'friendzoning' (ugh I really hate that expression) more. As a straight girl, I've had mates friendzone me more than once. I've also done it myself, and on the odd occasion I've had old friendships turn into something more. I really don't think there's any kind of general rule for this...the concept of 'friendzone' is just dumb and delibiliating IMO, because it creates this imaginary barrier that pushes you to limit yourself and doubt your abilities and relationships.

As you said -
if its a girl youre hot for, make sure she knows it
Click to expand...

And it really works for both genders. Your friendzone will certainly stay a friendzone if you don't let her/him know you want more :)
 
^

yeah, i know its a shitty term.. complicated subject isnt it? guys should strive to always be polite and charming with ladyfolk they meet - but i think its fairly crucial to start flirting very early on.. can be subtle as a slightly longer-than-necessary gaze into her eyes, brushing against her 'accidently', feeling that spark, knowing smiles.. that kind of stuff should let her know you mean business


smart guys often try to reason a girl into bed, applying logic to girls when girls are usually much more emotionally-driven by nature


if its a long-time friend though, youre getting into risky territory.. very hard to undo if shit goes sour
 
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