I agree with both sides unfortunately. At this point I'm pretty sure there's no hope in saving the relationship though.
She grew up having to provide everything for herself, working all through high school to support not only her, but her two younger brothers also. Thus, she's extremely responsible and work-driven. On the other hand, I grew up in a middle-upper class family with everything I could ever want/need and more provided for me. I've only worked 4 jobs in my life, made under 2k total myself, and have had everything else bought for me by my dad. As such, I have little motivation to work, am not very responsible when it comes to getting my shit done, etc etc. You get the picture.
In addition, while she is always thinking of what needs to be done and fretting about completing it. I'm always carefree and putting things off until the last minute, always ready to have fun instead of do something that doesn't have to be done absolutely right now, and sometimes even then. She's very serious about things and never sees more than what is there, never thinks about the big picture or what it all means. I'm the opposite, caring more about the esoteric and what's behind it all, not worrying too much about worldly issues. She calls me careless.
But I think what really pushed it over the edge was the fact that her best friend's little brother OD'd and died on NBOMe this April. We're from a small community, and it shook the entire community and set off a massive RC, psychedelic, and drug hate-fest.
She mentioned how I don't seem to care about her having such a hard loss, and using drugs like that anyways. How I was selfish to drive on it, endangering myself, and thus her and other's emotions and feeling. How I was selfish to hide it from her and sell it to her roommate's friends, thus letting them know, and having her left out feeling "like a dumbass." How I wasn't able to see her the night I got there because I was coming down from tripping, and thus put drugs in front of her. You get the picture.
Me, in my liberal drug perspective and generally aloof attitude didn't even think about all that being the way it is when doing it. Stupid, right?
In addition, it's only been four months since we started dating. I love her, even through how different we are. But she's at college in a sorority, and I'm at home working because I got suspended for a year. I don't know what to think, or do. Because I love her and want to be with her, but at the same time want to trip. But even bigger than that, because I realized I would give it up for her, is it even fair to her if we did keep dating? We wouldn't be able to see each other much at all, being 4.5 hours away. But she has an ocean of potentially better matches for her, while I'm in a 10k pop. town with no girls here to date, the ones that are here you wouldn't want to. Is that even fair? Or does love trump that?
My best friend here tells me that it's probably best for me to get over it and not try and get her back, seeing as I wasn't as emotionally/spiritually grounded as I should have been when we started dating, and got even worse at finding that inner peace always having her love and affection to bring me happiness. Almost like a drug, if you will. But I just don't want it to end, I can't stop thinking about us cuddling, her laughing and giggling, etc. I think it's just my ego that doesn't want it to end, to lose the girlfriend it was so proud it finally had after all these years. But I do love her. Help?
I'm sorry I'm turning this into a relationship thread, if need be mods can move it.
She grew up having to provide everything for herself, working all through high school to support not only her, but her two younger brothers also. Thus, she's extremely responsible and work-driven. On the other hand, I grew up in a middle-upper class family with everything I could ever want/need and more provided for me. I've only worked 4 jobs in my life, made under 2k total myself, and have had everything else bought for me by my dad. As such, I have little motivation to work, am not very responsible when it comes to getting my shit done, etc etc. You get the picture.
In addition, while she is always thinking of what needs to be done and fretting about completing it. I'm always carefree and putting things off until the last minute, always ready to have fun instead of do something that doesn't have to be done absolutely right now, and sometimes even then. She's very serious about things and never sees more than what is there, never thinks about the big picture or what it all means. I'm the opposite, caring more about the esoteric and what's behind it all, not worrying too much about worldly issues. She calls me careless.
But I think what really pushed it over the edge was the fact that her best friend's little brother OD'd and died on NBOMe this April. We're from a small community, and it shook the entire community and set off a massive RC, psychedelic, and drug hate-fest.
She mentioned how I don't seem to care about her having such a hard loss, and using drugs like that anyways. How I was selfish to drive on it, endangering myself, and thus her and other's emotions and feeling. How I was selfish to hide it from her and sell it to her roommate's friends, thus letting them know, and having her left out feeling "like a dumbass." How I wasn't able to see her the night I got there because I was coming down from tripping, and thus put drugs in front of her. You get the picture.
Me, in my liberal drug perspective and generally aloof attitude didn't even think about all that being the way it is when doing it. Stupid, right?
In addition, it's only been four months since we started dating. I love her, even through how different we are. But she's at college in a sorority, and I'm at home working because I got suspended for a year. I don't know what to think, or do. Because I love her and want to be with her, but at the same time want to trip. But even bigger than that, because I realized I would give it up for her, is it even fair to her if we did keep dating? We wouldn't be able to see each other much at all, being 4.5 hours away. But she has an ocean of potentially better matches for her, while I'm in a 10k pop. town with no girls here to date, the ones that are here you wouldn't want to. Is that even fair? Or does love trump that?
My best friend here tells me that it's probably best for me to get over it and not try and get her back, seeing as I wasn't as emotionally/spiritually grounded as I should have been when we started dating, and got even worse at finding that inner peace always having her love and affection to bring me happiness. Almost like a drug, if you will. But I just don't want it to end, I can't stop thinking about us cuddling, her laughing and giggling, etc. I think it's just my ego that doesn't want it to end, to lose the girlfriend it was so proud it finally had after all these years. But I do love her. Help?
I'm sorry I'm turning this into a relationship thread, if need be mods can move it.
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