any suggestions on not relapsing on meth

[ash0710]

I can quit Meth,but not for long. I feel great when off it and about 2-3 weeks I start the cycle over. I used to have a 400 week habit I quit spent 2 weeks In bed and had about 3 months under belt and slipped. Ever since I slip. I have no one to talk to no support and I work so muc since I am the one who us provider in the family. I get tired and wore out. Meth doesn't help me accomplish any ting other than I can work even more since "awake'. But o have to stop.I want to stop. Being bipolar is bad enough. I have never done anything bad while using. But I know I.look like shit and I know my husband hates it. Scares him. I was raised in a home alldrug/drinking topics were allowed. Very toxic relationships. I have had to all but cut ties with my mom. She kept me so aggravated and upset I had to distance myself. When young I just always figured I would die from drugs and kinda am wondering how I never did. I want to quit for good no more ever. Its either find help or do the selfish and easy approach and die. I can't do it anymore. i apologize for kinda jumping all over content wise I have no one to talk to and I need to just get it out. I

 

[tmuliosis]

While I've never tried crystal meth, you may benefit from legally prescribed adderall and sticking to the prescribed dosages. It should give you a little bit of an edge in terms of focus and maybe energy once you break 50mg a day (I've been prescribed up to 120mg a day. 4x30mg IR, but currently am prescribed 60mg a day 2x30 XR and find it to be a reasonable amount to help with ADHD and stabilize my mood). I suggest this because maybe you could find a reasonable dosage (between 40-60mg a day to start) that would give you some of the advantages that leads you to use meth in the first place.. It's not a bullet proof fix, but if you could make do, it would be much less stress on your body and life in general (plus not have to worry about things like being incarcerated).

I'm sure others with meth experience will chime in and maybe have some better advice. Either way, good luck with your struggle (and if you do get an adderall RX, do not abuse it! maybe an extra pill here and there since I know how it goes, but you will regret abusing it since it won't help you nearly as much).

 

[ash0710]

Thank you, I do not abuse prescription drugs, I have been on Xanax since 14 and now.in 30's. But its not something that makes me high it controls the severe anxiety. I have a Dr a very good not over medicate Dr and when I see him next I will discuss with him as he listed add as part of multiple diagnosis. Told him I was not but he said have to be careful what is written down, the public think bipolar people run around mass killing people. I am willing to try anything. I have been blessed that I am not dead or had any trouble legal wise. I.do know that of I don't stop it is in the future at some point. Death or jail are the only promises Meth will give. I am paranoid about weight and adderall would make me not hungry from what I understand. Oh and divorce, I understand that he got sober 6 years ago and know he is just waiting on me so we can move forward mend relationshhip and be happy. He feels his life in on hold. I can't argue that, he worries as he knows I am not scared of the drugs like some. From 14 to early 20's I was a serious user of anything. I ended up seeing old friend got some and liked I could work clean run errands etc and actually have the energy. 2 years later I realize that was a bad idea

 

[sekio]

OD --> The Dark Side

 

[T. Calderone]

You got clean for three months, you can do this again. What you need to do is stop talking to your dope friends, not to be mean but because they use and do not have your best interests at heart. Let them know you are serious about quitting and not to contact you if it involves drugs. Delete all those contacts. Quit driving past neighborhoods that you cop in because that is a trigger as well. If you make up your mind that you want this to end once and for all, it can be done! If you don't feel strong enough, try an NA meeting or support group. Good luck.

 

[Allein]

I feel for you on this one, I really want to stop using amphetamines, I've been using on and off for 20+ years but it's only been a problem these last few years, it's either high quality (you can buy cheap stuff here in the UK for a much lower price) or meth if I can get it, I usually but benzos at the same time as they enable me to get a little rest and appear a but more 'normal' to my family whilst I'mc on the binges which tend to last around 5-7 days.

I keep stopping for as much as a month or maybe even 2 (I managed that before xmas last year) but then I get sucked back in, all the memories of the and side of this fades and all I want is the feeling of being on speed the focus. the energy.....ironically all the things I lack in the week or so comedown from binging on the stuff.

I wont go into detail but I have limited my contacts to just one who I could break contact with easily, I don't associate with people who take these drugs any longer but the draw is till quite strong.

Lately I've sought some assistance from a free drug abuse advisory service and found them very supportive, I'm in the UK so services will be different but I would urge you to seek one out, ( if you don't get on with them try another ). You clearly have the strength to stop it's just making it stick which probably means some small changes in your life to replace the fulfilment the drug is providing, this could be achieved in many very simple ways but will be personal to you and your situation.

all my best wishes

 

[ash0710]

Thanks you guys. I have been through some seriously tough things, to all I appear extremely strong and even though at times like now I don't feel it I know it. I have my Med management Dr but I did call and get a appt set up with a therapist that deals with many issues one being substance abuse. Unfortunately until I can move my one an only person I know and only one around any of that world live less than 3 miles and that is probably exaggerating. A friend of my ex husband, so I am fortunate not to have to cut lots of ties. Sad part is when I am a good three weeks clean live starts to look better husband is starting to get back to normal it happens. Sometimes I can have best day and some how I take a left instead if the right

 

[Corazon]

Sounds like you are aware that you have a problem, and trying to make a change in your life.

Try to notice that when you said things like (paraphrasing)"all meth does is help me work more, when i'm tired..." and "I have never done anything bad while using", that whether that was your intent or not, it comes across as justifying the use.

Have to accept that meth is not for you, and banish it from your life forever.

 

[ash0710]

I am not making excuses, for no reason makes it ok. I can see how it could sound that way though. Being tired was a reason I chose to keep it up, and I was a extremely heavy user of all in reach when younger and yes then bad stuff did happen. That was more of in terms of marriage. Never cheated, let bills go etc. But bad did happen, me and my husband are disconnected and that sucks. I know I am going to have to keep things simple as possible. When I go off and binge I just am left with self hate and anger that I let it get me again. I want everything it is not

 

[VioletXxx]

I recently got out of rehab for IV meth use and as soon as I got my 30 day chip it was like something clicked and all I could do was plan my use. Ive relapsed 3 times (binges) since getting out on the 23 of June. My needle fixation is crazy and staying off the stuff is the hardest thing i've ever done. I honestly wish I could live in rehab forever, but sadly thats not a reality. I relate meth to being in an abusive relationship, you love it, but it is killing you, your scared to leave and scared to stay. I think building support systems and being social really helped me. Having 105 people to talk to about what your dealing with was the only way I got clean for 30 days.