Anxiety Following Unprotected Sex

[KevinKostner]

Do many of you experience extreme anxiety following unprotected sex?

Mine is mostly regarding HIV. It's been about 5 months since and I still have times in the day when I ponder on it and worry. I try to dim down the anxiety looking at statistics and the relative far chance for someone in the demographic of a early 20's white female having it but it's still there. Even after I had asked her before doing it and she adamantly said she had been tested 6 monthes prior and hadn't had sex in a year when I asked. I've been through a time of worrying before and I got tested with the 10 minute saliva test and it was negative but I almost passed out with anxiety in waiting the 10 minutes and had alot before as well, after that I was really happy and relieved and told myself I wouldn't put myself through it enough, but alas I chose to be reckless. I should go to the clinic soon but I don't have a car and don't feel like asking anyone to drive me since it's kind of personal.

Do you experience similar anxiety?

 

[barnstable84]

I have felt that type of anxiety myself when I had a one night stand and the condom broke.. I was so scared for so long, but ended up getting tested.

I think if you are so paralysed by fear about it, move mountains and earth to get yourself tested properly. Even if you can't talk to someone close to you who could drive you, can you use public transport? Your health should be the highest priority, but at least do it for your own peace of mind and your mental health and anxiety.

If it was me, i'd frigging steal a helicopter or something to get there, but i'm sure you'll be able to work something out. Good luck and I hope all goes well.

 

[PriestTheyCalledHim]

Yes I do.

I combat this by having safer sex and getting tested yearly or whenever I have a new partner and even getting tested with that partner.

I have friends who are bisexual/gay man and they've told me how if you want to stay HIV neg how you should assume that everyone who you're with is poz or could give you HIV and still have safer sex, use condoms, and get tested.

I know it sounds very morbid and fucked up but there have been times when I've been tested and I'll wonder what I'd do if I turned up poz but I'm not a bug chaser and I've never engaged in high risk/very high risk unprotected sex. Just low/moderate stuff like giving oral sex to men and women.

I'm sure this stems from when I was younger I thought I had became poz and it turned out I was not.

Because of this and from friends who wound up poz either from sharing IV rigs or unprotected sex that yes it's a major life changing event to yourself and your health but life does go on and yes the meds do have horrible side effects but your chances of living go up if you start on them and have an excellent doctor.

KK-If you're in the U.S. many drug stores and pharmacies sell those HIV home testing kits. My ex and I have used those and they cost about $50-60 but it's totally anonymous, it's a blood test, and you fed-ex the sample into a lab and call in a day or two later to get results via phone.

 

[KevinKostner]

Yes I do.

I know it sounds very morbid and fucked up but there have been times when I've been tested and I'll wonder what I'd do if I turned up poz but I'm not a bug chaser and I've never engaged in high risk/very high risk unprotected sex. Just low/moderate stuff like giving oral sex to men and women.


KK-If you're in the U.S. many drug stores and pharmacies sell those HIV home testing kits. My ex and I have used those and they cost about $50-60 but it's totally anonymous, it's a blood test, and you fed-ex the sample into a lab and call in a day or two later to get results via phone.

No, that's not morbid at all. I think it's natural, there's always the wonder of if you do get it would you completely give up on life or push on knowing your clocks ticking a bit faster. I'm going to wait a while because I had unprotected sex in January but several more times with the same partner up until early March so it would be better to wait a while. I would have more reason to worry if I wasn't in contact with this person but I am and have questioned them about testing a few times. Almost interogated like tell me what hospital or clinic you went to, ect.

Can't spare the $50 for the at home test. I've been putting off spending $12 on the round trip for public transport for sure can't do $50. Anyways I guess I feel like I learned my lesson, feel like I've become jaded and it's hard to get erect with a condom on though.

 

[Draigan]

lol the other day I was having sex and the condom broke. I said after "you better have an abortion if your pregnant." lol. She wasnt impressed to say the least. Fack I was scared

 

[hyroller]

lol... the only anxiety that follows is with catching some kind of STD
(I take the pill, wheee )

I'm much more cautious in my old age though. by all rights I should have caught something from the number of strangers I've banged minus a rubber.... but I guess some higher force was at play and forgave me for my naivete - lucky for me!
condoms give me a terrible, uncomfortable rash, so it's not like I was goin around trying to play russian roulette with my health!

although in all truth though I never got nekkid with any dirty or unhygienic types of men even when I was a shagasaurus rex

 

[Ramirez]

I used to get that anxiety, but I honestly don't now because I've been with the same girl for a while now and neither of us are infected with any STDs. We ruled it out a while ago, and even though she uses the pill, we still use a condom, just to be absolutely sure.

 

[barnstable84]

Can't spare the $50 for the at home test. I've been putting off spending $12 on the round trip for public transport for sure can't do $50. Anyways I guess I feel like I learned my lesson, feel like I've become jaded and it's hard to get erect with a condom on though.

I would be more than happy to send you some money to get either transport to a clinic or to pay for a home test if you aren't able to spare the money. It would be completely worth it for the sake of your anxiety.. PM me if I can help, ok?

 

[malakaix]

I had unprotected sex with a girl for a month that i 'knew' use to inject years ago.. but still continued with it..

It wasn't until a few months later when i started to feel constantly sick for no reason that i became quite anxious and and began to remember her past and people she had been with before me, which sent me on a mission to get myself tested.. couldn't believe i was clean, lucky i guess.

But it's definitely an eventful reminder.

 

[8ft-Sativa]

Yeah ... it's a fucking shit situation.

Okay ..... I had sex with a random local girl in a part of the world where HIV is pretty widespread.

The Condom broke ........ Fuck!

I was too shy to go to a DR and get a tested for HIV and all the other shit ....

I tried to ignore it, but was in the back of my head that I COULD be infected for over a year before I got the courage to go get tested.

The stress was enormous .. it put a massive strain on me .. and all for nothing because I turned out negative when I actaully got the courage to go get tested.

Do it ASAP .... And stastics are enormously in your favour. But you need the Piece of mind, so go get tested.

 

[L O V E L I F E]

Pregnancy & other STD's are real risks.

Heterosexual AIDS, on the other hand, is a fucking myth.

If you're stressed that you got HIV from a single heterosexual encounter, then you might as well stress out every single time you cross the street.

Harm reduction is great - deceptive scare tactics are not.

 

[User Name Here]

Do many of you experience extreme anxiety following unprotected sex?

Mine is mostly regarding HIV. It's been about 5 months since and I still have times in the day when I ponder on it and worry. I try to dim down the anxiety looking at statistics and the relative far chance for someone in the demographic of a early 20's white female having it but it's still there. Even after I had asked her before doing it and she adamantly said she had been tested 6 monthes prior and hadn't had sex in a year when I asked. I've been through a time of worrying before and I got tested with the 10 minute saliva test and it was negative but I almost passed out with anxiety in waiting the 10 minutes and had alot before as well, after that I was really happy and relieved and told myself I wouldn't put myself through it enough, but alas I chose to be reckless. I should go to the clinic soon but I don't have a car and don't feel like asking anyone to drive me since it's kind of personal.

Do you experience similar anxiety?

Yeah. The one time I ever had "unprotected sex" with someone I didn't know anything about was against my will. I was terrified while I was in the hospital, especially when they couldn't test for everything right away. I had to wait some time before I could go back, and that waiting period was absolute hell. I had no idea what that person may have been carrying, and the fact that he had done that to me made me assume that he had done the same to other people and he is therefore reckless. Who knows what the hell he had contracted himself. I really thought I was going to pop positive for something; anything.

And I didn't.

I can't imagine feeling that kind of anxiety ever again, and this is one of the reasons I have always been obnoxiously careful when it comes to sex.

 

[DrunkardsDream]

Pregnancy & other STD's are real risks.

Heterosexual AIDS, on the other hand, is a fucking myth.

If you're stressed that you got HIV from a single heterosexual encounter, then you might as well stress out every single time you cross the street.

Harm reduction is great - deceptive scare tactics are not.

With ignorance like that it's no wonder why lots of Heteros are getting pozzed but nobody talks about it except for HIV/AIDS activists and as the media and most people still see HIV+ people as only being gay/bisexual men and IV drug users.

Try telling Heterosexuals who are Poz that are living in the USA, UK, Europe, Asia, Australia/NZ, and Africa that heterosexual HIV/AIDS is a myth. 8)

Yes you can become Poz from just having unprotected sex once even if you're heterosexual.

If you look up the numbers for HIV/AIDS most of the people in the world who have it and spread it are heterosexual.

Keep telling yourself that Heterosexuals getting pozzed is a myth. Ignorant attitudes like this are just why people become poz since they think that it won't happen to them.

I know men and women who are Heterosexual and Poz and while they are out about their + status you yourself would never know this about them unless they told you.

For everyone else that's not ignorant and who doesn't have their head in the sand check out www.avert.org www.thebody.com and www.poz.com

If you want harm prevention look into PEP and using condoms everytime, unless you are with a longterm partner who you're monogamous with and you've both been tested.

 

[User Name Here]

Pregnancy & other STD's are real risks.

Heterosexual AIDS, on the other hand, is a fucking myth.

If you're stressed that you got HIV from a single heterosexual encounter, then you might as well stress out every single time you cross the street.

Harm reduction is great - deceptive scare tactics are not.

Absolutely not. I have no idea where you got this idea. It's not the 80's anymore 8)

In fact, there was a man in TX charged with assault for knowingly passing HIV to HETEROSEXUAL women, all of whom were in their 40's and had been recently divorced. Many of the women had never been with another sexual partner save their ex-husband. They were in the least likely group to get HIV, yet more than ten of them contracted it from one heterosexual man who not only knew about his problem, but continued having sex with women unprotected.

There are PLENTY of heterosexuals with AIDS. I seriously have no idea how anyone would truly believe otherwise. That's almost a joke.

 

[8ft-Sativa]

Absolutely not. I have no idea where you got this idea. It's not the 80's anymore 8)

I

Amen ... and i'm not even religious..


Okay, read my last post ... let's get with the program .... read in between the lines.

YES ,the chances are on his side BUT as, Papa Smurf said " Better safe than sorry" ... please got get tested "and it will be alright" ...

I just want you to to get tested fpr piece of mind .... as I went through Hell ............. for nothing.

 

[KevinKostner]

Pregnancy & other STD's are real risks.

Heterosexual AIDS, on the other hand, is a fucking myth.

If you're stressed that you got HIV from a single heterosexual encounter, then you might as well stress out every single time you cross the street.

Harm reduction is great - deceptive scare tactics are not.

Yeah I know this isn't true. It's alot more common among minorities and homosexuals but I know it still exists in white heterosexuals. And to barnstable i appreciate the thought but I'm cool like I said the time tables say I should wait until July or August to make sure they're accurate. Money won't be an issue beyond early June.

Btw I hate the word "poz" and "pozzed". Ugh dunno why.

I guess I got some piece of mind asking the girl where she got tested and she answered pretty quick and had the dates down. Yeah and despite hating rubbers I'm not doing it again because I know I'll get into worrying for a while afterwards like now.

 

[User Name Here]

Btw I hate the word "poz" and "pozzed". Ugh dunno why.

I guess I got some piece of mind asking the girl where she got tested and she answered pretty quick and had the dates down. Yeah and despite hating rubbers I'm not doing it again because I know I'll get into worrying for a while afterwards like now.

Grr I hate it when people talk like that as well. I hate really slang or purposely misspelled words (wut, biz, gurl, sup, preggers, dats, lyke, sik, lol, pwn, brah, omg, iz...). It makes people look like they're 14 or some shit 8) Not to go off on a tangent but I feel like people in the U.S. can't even properly speak our first language these days, let alone spell any of it's words. It's disgusting and disheartening. I browse message boards, facebook, Myspace, whatever and I am literally dumbfounded by the stupidity of it all. I see people 20+ talking like they're in 6th grade; people who are pre-med or at ivy league schools. It's amazing.

Also, good for you for never doing it again. It's not worth the anxiety afterwards. One hour of pleasure vs. weeks of worry? The choice is obvious

 

[m c f]

Man, you got a lot of options still even when something happens. I've only had to use Plan B once, thankfully, but that really helped me stop worrying. That and always having condoms handy and making sure to use them. Also, testing was not a problem, a friend told me about a free clinic where you can get tested for everything at once, just walk in and walk out. I used to have bouts of worrying, but if any of that happens again, I have both Plan B and the address of the clinic. I'd advise everyone to do that. And if you're a guy, have condoms and use them.

 

[KevinKostner]

Man, you got a lot of options still even when something happens. I've only had to use Plan B once, thankfully, but that really helped me stop worrying. That and always having condoms handy and making sure to use them. Also, testing was not a problem, a friend told me about a free clinic where you can get tested for everything at once, just walk in and walk out. I used to have bouts of worrying, but if any of that happens again, I have both Plan B and the address of the clinic. I'd advise everyone to do that. And if you're a guy, have condoms and use them.

yea but u need to wait 4-6 monthes for hiv test and those months suck....not to mention once u've been jaded with having sex raw its hard to get used to condoms...i think i might need viagra or something if im using condoms

 

[hyroller]

well the reality is, as blissful as sex is in an act of itself, if you aren't prepared to rear children with the person you're sleeping with (which - unless someone's had a vasectomy/tubes tied - is an inescapable possibility) then really you shouldn't have to go there.

of course I'm not trying to advocate sex before marriage, just pointing out the brevity of the gesture.