SSRI's are not all bad
Having spent 3 years heavily abusing predominantly, MDMA and Amp base with a bit of hash and some coke thrown in. I'd become pretty depressed but wasn't really accepting the possibility of just how depressed I was. I had smoked hash bit it had recently started to make me very paranoid so had to knock it on the head.
After a night out with a few friends, we ended up back at someones house and I fancied something else to do to replace the smoke, as I'd just given up hash due to paranoid side effects, I said "Anything else I can do?" "Well I've got prozac (fluoxitine 20mg)" sayed someone "Yes I'll give that a try" Said I with no idea what I'm being offered but trusted my friend" Anyway I was handed this capsule which I split and racked into 2 lines.
I snorted the lines which felt like they'd set my nose on fire for a bit but the effects in my head were profound. It was as if my head had been full of stress and confusion and illogical thought and almost like a switch had been flicked, the confusion cleared, the stress evaporated and suddenly everything seemed to make sense. I felt as if I could rationalize for the first time in as long as I could remember. I could approach issues in a logical manner which I had lost long time ago. I also felt self assured and felt confidence that I had lost long ago,. I felt functional in a way I hadn't felt for years.
What followed was the most organized and productive week that I'd had for as long as I could remember and achieved many things.. After about 7 days the benefits had pretty much faded to nothing and I was back to being my confused, lethargic, depressed, unconfident , self again.
I went to my doctor and relayed this story and was greeted with a bit of sceptticism but he signed me up for a regular fluoxitine prescription saying it couldn't do any harm and I didn't look back after that. I took them for a couple of years and just got out of the habit of taking them when I no longer needed them. To me they were an absolute Godsend and I'm just sorry that more people don't generally get any thing like the benefits that I did.. I found that it made me think a lot but in a logical way so was able to resolve issues in my head as or even before they arose.. The thoughts didn't suddenly switch off at bedtime so found it hard to settle down initially but soon found that if I cleared my mind of all thoughts and images, I could soon drop off to sleep. It did take a bit of practice but I soon mastered it. Wonderful stuff IME
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I'll return later to tidy this up when I've not been up for 3 days nor experiencing double vision .
I'll try to add some useful detail though this was 7 years ago.