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Another of my short writings...

PiHKAL

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 17, 2000
Messages
283
Location
Miss, On, Canada
Hey all. I know I promised another, and i know this is super late...I just lost the disk I saved it too. D'oh!
Enjoy.
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And there on the porch lay the body of a young girl. Unmolested and with no visible wounds, she stares lifelessly at the stars, each and every one creating a glitter in her eyes. As you move forward, you realize that she is still breathing and a wave of relief rushes over you. Nothing would have let you forgive yourself should she have died, nothing. However, her breathing is obviously labored, and you know you must act quickly if you ever hope to wish her goodnight again. As you struggle to remember first aid, a neighbor emerges from their garage and casts a glance in your direction, gasps, and immediately runs over.
"What happened?"
"I dunno, she just fainted..." you lie instinctivly.
"I'll call an ambulance" he mutters and runs through your front door.
As you kneel next to the dying girl, a tear forms in your eye. You reach down and cradle her head in your arms, bringing her gasping mouth close to your heart. The neighbour emerges from the house and places a firm hand on your shoulder, a gesture from the heart, one that only serves to upset you more. As that solitary tear slowly works its way down your cheek, your mind begins to overload with guilt. If only this; I should've that...
As the seconds pass, you can do nothing but continue to cradle the girl, your tears dripping freely now. The sound of a siren pierces the night as the ambulance rushes down the street. As you look up, you notice that the neighbor has left you, and is standing at the end of your driveway, flailing his arms at the speeding ambulance. You keep your head up long enough to see the headlights swing into your driveway and come to a complete stop, looking back to the girl before you see the paramedics swinging open their doors.
A strong looking young man takes the girl from you, and lays her down flat on the damp wood of the porch. You wince as you see the pain in her eyes, the struggle that it is for her to breathe. The paramedics push you aside, eager to assist the girl in whatever way they can, but as soon as they begin to look hopeful, her young body burst into convulsion, startling both you and the paramedics. As they fight to hold her still, you turn away, unable to watch the horror you have caused. Suddenly, the thrashing of her young body stops, you can tell because all has fallen silent. You turn to look at the paramedics, just as the one farthest away closes your little sisters eyes.
As your mouth screams, your mind only wishes you had hidden your stash a little better.
Peace..
PiHKAL
 
Whats wrong?
smile.gif
 
That was a really awesome discriptive story. Very vivid. You could see everything happening and it definately had an intriguing pace. Nice moral attatched too. I really love it.
 
i am bawling my eyes out, seriously, oooh that was so excellent, so well written, so real and sooooo sad
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i thought it was you i needed nevertheless i have learnt thru the pain i needed me
 
the wall between reality and fantasy can be broke through many times heaven forbid it should be like that
That was an amazing story that makes you think of all the small mistakes which you make everyday which may not always have a small conclusion.
*always try to be aware and safe*
 
There you go stinging and amazing me again... I loved it. You have awesome talent.
This is why I have a no beanz policy in my house and around my kids. It could happen...........
Hugs,
Caress (jumping down from the pulpit)
 
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