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Annoying Ex interferes in my life

dopemaster

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Mar 10, 2013
Messages
6,376
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Wherever I Lay My Head
So I know this woman who is in my circle of friends and we dated on and off over the years and were FWB sometimes. Those days have long since passed. She has turned into quite some scum these days. She steals, rips people off, creates/spreads/perpetuates rumors, and is just a general lying bitch. I try to avoid contact with her and she knows I dont want to see her as I have told her so.

She stole some pots and pans from my mom one time for example and I had to go thru alot of bullshit to get it back. She steals from every store she goes in. She called the mother of a girl I liked and implied that I was a dope dealer and that the girl was in debt to me. That was bullshit. She called my last serious gf and said I was seeing her behind my gfs back. It was good that my girl at the time did not believe her. Once again bullshit. Shes a hooker and its embarassing that I used to date her now that she is a whore. So I hate the fact that she brings up our history so everyone definetly knows. I asked her to keep her distance, stop talking about the fact we used to date and be fuck buddies in the past, and to stay away from women I date.

So anyways I ended up throwing a small amount of money on lets say a bag of popcorn with a girl Im kind of interested in and lo and behold her hookup is this evil Ex of mine. So first thing she says is "dopemaster is a great guy and hes got a really big cock." She always says that, really just so if there is any doubt that we where more than just friends in the past there isnt any now. But then she goes on and on. She talks about my sexual performance which isnt receiving bad reviews from her, but I wish she would shut it. Then she will say "remember when I shot some coke in your dick while you shot smack in your arm?". Well of course I do, especially with you keeping mentioning it and thanks for sharing this with someone I would like to impress.

Than shit takes a turn for the worse. She comes out the dope house screaming she got robbed. She called her brother saying I was holding her phone for collateral and she was scared. Then she tried to give me her piece of shit phone which I did not want. She asked my friend to drive her to an apartment complex where people tend to score coke. We get there and her bro hands me the money she robbed me for after I told him what happened. Anyways I try to tell my friend just to leave this woman there cuz she had not paid her anything back and was spending her money on coke. She said she would feel guilty. She had a kid with her and I said fuck it to myself. My friend had to go home, so my ex needed a ride home and asked me to come back with her which I said no and shes like come one silly and Im like Id rather not. So anyways I get dropped off first. I felt bad my friend got robbed but she kinda showed up at my house with my ex and I just had this bad feeling from the start. Anyways I wonder what type of garbage my ex had to say when my friend to her back home.

This EX of mine has the tendency to make friends with other girls and just take advantage of them till they wont communicate with her. This girl is just the next victim of her friendship. She will steal from this girl and try to fuck her over like pretending she got robbed and pocketing the money. Thats some fuck shit, but I know she did it cuz her brother paid me in hopes I wouldnt say she does that shit on the regular.

But really it goes on, she starts talking about things she knows jack shit about. Like this girl had a kid and she says I didnt have much to do with my last gfs kid. Thing is neither I nor her discussed that relationship with this woman. She than says I would be a good surrogate father or good father substitute. Thats just kinda blunt and obnoxious. Honestly I really dont even like to talk about that particular relationship because it was pretty serious and I was very into that last woman and she knows I dont even want to talk about it.

It gets worse though cuz soon as Im not around she just lets her gums flap about me. She just makes up shit and its not always nice stuff. She would often say this one girl I dated made me pay for the coochy which is just ridiculous. I wouldnt pay for it, but its not nice thing to say nor is it true. It makes me look like a sucker and that woman look like a whore. Than she says Im good friends with her and well Im not. I dont talk to her and I dont hang out with her and she knows it.

It seems like she just worms her way into interacting with any woman Im seen with or talking to. This girl sells dope so she knows alot of people and is up to snuff on gossip and other peoples business. She once offered me 80 dollars worth of pills for a womans parents phone number. She had intentions of calling up and leaving a message to the affect that this woman whores herself out. Its a good thing my phone is locked. She would never get that number from me, cuz I knew this woman only gave out her home phone number to serious bfs and I would never want to hurt her like that dating or not.

But basically how do I deal with this woman. She is a bit obsessed with me and I cant stand her meddling in my life.
 
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I'd stop my association with her if I were in your position.

You express that this person is totally dishonest, that she's stolen from you and your family and doesn't use drugs for fun, but as a lifestyle. That's reason alone. Don't let her rope you into contact. You will, without question, be dragged down with her fail.
 
I have stopped association. I avoid her like the plague. The last time I saw her I didnt know she had tagged along with a friend. I dont take her calls. What she does is find out info about me and than do all sorts of shit like spread rumors, share embarassing things, or just show up at my place. She also calls from other numbers and I will say I have to go and she might say something like "whats that, hey is it cool if I just swing by." Even if I yell hell no she has shown up. Its horrible to even run in to her in public or at a friends house. I know shes a junkie and I have no desire to see her. Thats the problem, shes just taking it personally and fucking with me to the best of her ability. If she knows Im seeing a woman, she will call that girl. I dont have to tell her if Im dating someone for her to know it. She always ask people what Im up to and shes a local dealer.
 
Do you live in a very small town or just run in tight circle? She seems to attach herself to people she knows associate with you. Let your "real" friends know that she's a manipulator, change your number and under no circumstances should they give your number to anybody. If she comes by your house, don't feel obligated to let her in. Your common denominator is drugs use and even though you may have stopped associating with her, she keeps tabs on you through your mutual friends. People who know your personal business are being manipulated maybe without realizing it. It's a game to her and she evidently gets off on this shit.
 
somebody can't interfere in your life to this extent without your consent. you need to choose to stop allowing this to happen.

alasdair
 
Do you live in a very small town or just run in tight circle? She seems to attach herself to people she knows associate with you. Let your "real" friends know that she's a manipulator, change your number and under no circumstances should they give your number to anybody. If she comes by your house, don't feel obligated to let her in. Your common denominator is drugs use and even though you may have stopped associating with her, she keeps tabs on you through your mutual friends. People who know your personal business are being manipulated maybe without realizing it. It's a game to her and she evidently gets off on this shit.

You hit the nail on the head. This woman is very prominent on the local drug scene. Also most her family sells dope too. She must talk to at least 50 people a day. Its not a small town but its not a big city either, my senior class was about 1500 students. Drugs are most definetly are common denominator as she has 3 brothers who have all done time for selling dope and she has done a couple years herself. She has no regard for other people, herself, or consequences to her actions. She likes to fuck with people in general, but she seems to be very mad that I no longer wish to carry on with her sexually. Her main turn off is her personality and not her looks. I try to have NOTHING to do with her. I dont take her calls ever and I screen my calls so if I receive a call from a number I dont know I dont answer. I may find out who it was by calling from a blocked number and seeing who answers and whos voicemail it is and usually hang up. She does make a great deal of effort to ask about me. She ask people if I seeing anyone and who and if its serious. She does this shit all the time so its making it hard for me to date. She will call girls im talking to, their ex's and even their relatives. The shit she does is actually kinda stalker type behavior in a sense. I think I do need to make it more clear to other people that her intentions are quite ill.

As Alasdairm pointed out she can't be interfering in my life like this. I dont really feel as though I am choosing this. I think that I need to have no contact with her under any circumstances. I have done my best to ignore her, but I think I need to just absolutly refuse to have any interaction. I should have told my friend that I did not think it would be a good idea for us to cop from her even if it was my friend doing the copping. She will take advantage of any chance she can get to interfere with me.

Like I said though she goes thru great lengths to fuck with people. I had mentioned she had tried to buy a phone number from me to fuck with someone else. Im not the only person she pulls this crap with but she is very angry with me as we used to be friends for about a decade and dated on and off and I have witnessed her fucking with people to no end.

She refuses to accept that we are not friends and still refers to me as her best friend even though I had told her that we are not friends in any way and that we are nothing more than aquaintances at the most. I of course had tried initially to say we should still be friends and on good terms but she started pulling this shit over a year or two ago and still persists and really after the first incident I went off on her and said that we were not even friends anymore. I think there is no way I can make her understand this shit is unaceptable as she really doesnt care. Im more than ok with keeping contact cut, but it seems as though I still hear through the grapevine all the ridiculous bullshit she is still doing. People let me know what shes doing and then usually add what she did to them.

Like T. said she gets off on this shit. Its a frustrating situation. Her brother used to be my best friend and room mate. Her other brother is a great connection but I avoid him due to her. I kinda wish she would OD or go back to prison. Shes got more siblings but I dont want to get into it anymore. Honestly she is quite notorious around here and I dont want to give up my location or identity by getting to detailed with some info.

I appreciate the responses and any advice you have. Im not really the type to be a victim to anything. Ive never had trouble dealing with this type of shit before.
 
You hit the nail on the head. This woman is very prominent on the local drug scene. Also most her family sells dope too. She must talk to at least 50 people a day. Its not a small town but its not a big city either, my senior class was about 1500 students. Drugs are most definetly are common denominator as she has 3 brothers who have all done time for selling dope and she has done a couple years herself. She has no regard for other people, herself, or consequences to her actions. She likes to fuck with people in general, but she seems to be very mad that I no longer wish to carry on with her sexually. Her main turn off is her personality and not her looks. I try to have NOTHING to do with her. I dont take her calls ever and I screen my calls so if I receive a call from a number I dont know I dont answer. I may find out who it was by calling from a blocked number and seeing who answers and whos voicemail it is and usually hang up. She does make a great deal of effort to ask about me. She ask people if I seeing anyone and who and if its serious. She does this shit all the time so its making it hard for me to date. She will call girls im talking to, their ex's and even their relatives. The shit she does is actually kinda stalker type behavior in a sense. I think I do need to make it more clear to other people that her intentions are quite ill.

As Alasdairm pointed out she can't be interfering in my life like this. I dont really feel as though I am choosing this. I think that I need to have no contact with her under any circumstances. I have done my best to ignore her, but I think I need to just absolutly refuse to have any interaction. I should have told my friend that I did not think it would be a good idea for us to cop from her even if it was my friend doing the copping. She will take advantage of any chance she can get to interfere with me.

Like I said though she goes thru great lengths to fuck with people. I had mentioned she had tried to buy a phone number from me to fuck with someone else. Im not the only person she pulls this crap with but she is very angry with me as we used to be friends for about a decade and dated on and off and I have witnessed her fucking with people to no end.

She refuses to accept that we are not friends and still refers to me as her best friend even though I had told her that we are not friends in any way and that we are nothing more than aquaintances at the most. I of course had tried initially to say we should still be friends and on good terms but she started pulling this shit over a year or two ago and still persists and really after the first incident I went off on her and said that we were not even friends anymore. I think there is no way I can make her understand this shit is unaceptable as she really doesnt care. Im more than ok with keeping contact cut, but it seems as though I still hear through the grapevine all the ridiculous bullshit she is still doing. People let me know what shes doing and then usually add what she did to them.

Like T. said she gets off on this shit. Its a frustrating situation. Her brother used to be my best friend and room mate. Her other brother is a great connection but I avoid him due to her. I kinda wish she would OD or go back to prison. Shes got more siblings but I dont want to get into it anymore. Honestly she is quite notorious around here and I dont want to give up my location or identity by getting to detailed with some info.

I appreciate the responses and any advice you have. Im not really the type to be a victim to anything. Ive never had trouble dealing with this type of shit before.

My advice remains the same - keep away from this person. The best contact you can have with her is no contact. Sure, the two of you have history, but that's best left in the past. Screw the grapevine. This person is making you upset/worried/sad. That's not OK.
 
Thats the plan and its been the plan. I broke things off with her years ago and yet she continues this stuff. I have nothing to do with her. It annoys me though that despite the lack of contact she persists in this garbage and has for years. Her behaviour is completly unaceptable and I have no desire for any contact. I just wonder if she will do this for as long as I live in this area. Regardless it will hurt me the least if I distance myself. I guess there is not much else I can do about her than that. I can make it known to my friends that she is full of shit and is just out to try to damage my reputation (normally I could give a shit about my rep). It just bothers me when it affects my relationships with women. Normally when you break up with someone they stay out of your life, but since breaking up with her she is more interested in me and my life more than she ever was. She seems to genuinly want to ruin or at least cause problems in my relationships. I try to tell people to pay her no mind, but it bothers women when this bitch is out there calling them whores just because they date me or are talking to me and she catches wind of it. It creates the illusion that maybe something is still going on between us and also it sucks because woman know that if they date me, they may have this crazy bitch talking shit about them in the future. So more than hurting me, it hurts people I care about and puts strain on relationships. Im not even gonna attempt to try to figure out why Im so important to this woman.
 
if you are still heavily involved in the drug scene you will find people giving her your info.

either move town or quit the drug scene.

sounds like you live in a goldfish bowl. in a big city it would be very hard for her to track you down like this
 
Its a medium city and Im not about to quit drugs. Im trying to quit this city soon, though for many reasons, but I will be glad to have a county or two between us. As far as the drug scene I do my best to avoid it for the most part and to keep my business private. I really dont tell anyone if Im dating even friends these days. I always just say nothing serious when asked about the subject no matter who it is. Im not really trusting anyone at this point. Its kinda lame to consider moving cuz a crazy bitch fucks with every women I date. She has gotten physical with one girl and whooped her ass. They got in an arguement and a fight in a fucking convience store. She also lives just a few miles from me. But anyways Ive been planning on moving and well Ill never have to worry about seeing her again soon. My mother and I discussed this woman today. We both agree that she has serious mental issues. My ma says "usually you like someone more once you get to know them, with her its quite the opposite." This woman is definetly what I would call damaged goods and a straight up sociopath psycho. All my friends feel the same way. She is the type that once the jig is up to just move on to new victims, but she has this vendetta against me and I usually try to date women who are not in the drug scene heavily. What she does is call them up and sell em pot cheap and try to hang out. Than she borrows stuff and doesnt return it, steals their shit, and eventually shits em hard on a drug deal. But while she is doing this she is running her mouth to a whole new group of people. So shes kinda on this seek and destroy shit and her targets are often women I have dated. They always wise up to her, but it causes strife none the less.
 
Why don't you go to the police and get a restraining order against her?
 
Indeed Jersey and that shall be the last time I put myself in a position like that. I learned my lesson about her and things in general from that experience. I admit that I did drop the ball there and I learned from it. Its good to try to learn from your mistakes so you dont make them again.
Llama that sounds great in theory but shes not a physical danger to me and it would get fucking messy. It may happen in the future, especially if she attacks another woman physically over me again. She has no right to do that shit.
For now I think Im gonna just lay off the scene and proceed with my plans to get out of this city. There is nothing here for me anyways and well my family wants out of here too. So Ill just keep on with my own stuff and keep my nose clean for the time being. At least until I can figure out a way to sort this, but Im afraid this matter cannot be sorted easily.
 
when dealing with a vindictive sociopath your best bet is to move. if she knows where you live and she lives close by then thats the problem.

move to somewhere a bit further but for strategic reasons that enhance your life in other ways as opposed to just escaping this reptile of a woman
 
My family and I have plans to buy a bunch of land and build several houses on it. This sounds totally kick ass. We would be able to shoot guns anytime we want, have loads of privacy, cook out, and do all sorts of red-neck shit which is what we are all into. So Im all for a move and it will be soon and publicly unanouced.
 
I know this thread is old but I wanted to say I dropped that bitch like a bad habit.

I just refused to see her.

Well I told her I would meet her for coffee and she got all offended and was like lets go to the bar. I told her she couldn't drink responsibly.

It was all kinda harsh but so was attacking me with that degree of violence.

I did end up speaking to her recently the other day and she had been in rehab for a long time. I was calling her brother and she intercepted the call. I turned down her advances.

I am seeing someone new and talking to a few women. i really have no interest in her and I can't even be friends with her at all after the crap she pulled.

I guess i feel as though an apology just doesn't cut it after what she did. Even the offers of free drugs or NSA sex are not enough.

I really feel its for the best for me to not see her all, especially since she has gotten violent with me and other people. Violence towards a lover is just unacceptable. I am not playing that. No way.
 
Ya, she sounds like a total and dangerous nutcase. Move soon if you can because she's got her fangs gripped into your arm and by the sounds of it, she's going to continue sabotaging you and yours. You can't let this crazy person threaten your new heart interests. No girl enjoys a crazy ex girlfriend lingering on,especially one like this. Yikes.
 
^
Yep.

I actually just bought my new lady friend a combat knife which she loves btw.

Its just as well my ex-lover from now a very long time ago doesn't really know who I have been with lately.

She just did about 6 months in rehab. She snitched to dodge a 3 year prison sentence and that is one more reason to stay away from her.

If did really freak me out when she answered when I called my friend. TBPH I am not that close of friends with this guy and he really pissed me off yesterday so I think I may end that friendship as well.

Right now things are going to well for me. I have a rather healthy open-relationship, I own and run a small business, and I am fixing up my house to sell. Things have never been better and well "hell hath no fury like that of a woman scorned and well whether or not I did her wrong is up for debate, she sure is gunning for me.
 
She's done some really fucked up things to you. Rehab or not, I doubt that this girl has changed. I hope she doesn't begin stalking you again and interfering with your new relationship.
 
I won't let let let her and the gal I am seeing knows this woman herself and hates her just as much as me.

I just really hope she doesn't show up at the store I am opening in about a month.

I suppose we can refuse service to anyone we please though.
 
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