and she thinks...what title can i put to make these people read my writing?

[RavinRaych]

a candy coated empty girl
step inside my mouth
i may swallow you alive
like i did myself
i don't even need the water
live inside my mind
I hope you will see what i want you to
i hope you can breathe what i do
i've been screaming down the passages of freedom for 17 years
But sometimes, I dont even hear myself.
Waiting to escape my own metallic happiness
that i have bathed myself in
but how can i climb out of this sink hole
That i shoved myself into?
Why should i be afraid of myself
to put the super glue back onto those wings
that i ripped off so long ago?
then i remind myself
your wings were never white
goddammit what is wrong with me?
So now do you want to see out the other side of my eyes
i'm warning you
you're going to feel smothered by yourself
going to be breathing stale air of forbidden hopes
and i would tell you how many licks it takes
to get to the center of my mind
but to be honest i never made it.

 

[C Divinity]

wow..love it
------------------
You gotta be a bad girl in this world to be heard--DJ Rap
"The integrity of a man's creative work is of greater importance than any charitable endeavor. Those of you who do not understand this are the men destroying the world"
"I'm not here to be served, but to serve"

 

[ice-9]

finding yourself is never an easy thing...
and also, more people might be reading your work than you think. just because no one responds doesn't mean they haven't seen it.

 

[amber ::]

absolutely fabulous

 

[marbica]

 

[RavinRaych]

Yeah, I know that just bc people don't respond doesn't mean they haven't read it. I always put stuff that is catchy on my topics, it just seems the thing to do, *if you want imputs, or to share your writings with other people* but i don't expect everyone to respond. It was what popped into my head, and i thought it was funny. So there ya go.

But thanks.
plurr
raychul
-----
so you scream it into your pillow at night, but you're still screaming.

 

[yoUr bLiSS]

this was awesome! i love the title "a candy coated empty girl" you should have used it..it's catchy and colorful.

 

[:: sTAr kiTtEn ::]

damn.... that was really awesome!
i liked the very last lines the best.... i can't get the picture of a human lolipop out of my head.

very nice

 

[yakksoho]

loved it mate
loved it