Amphetamine binge

[fucteh]

I'm not sure if this belongs here, I do apologise if it doesn't.

Been trying to fit the world up my nose for the past few weeks unsucessfully. Its not something I do often anymore, I never put any effort into scoring. Out of sight out of mind as they say.
This is all well and good.. however. It's started happening now that people are taking the initiative and calling me (moved away from home last year to try and stop getting warped all the time) as I'm like a black hole for alcohol and drugs, except I spit money back out. All it takes is that one innocent phone call, one innocent line, one innocent gram, an extremely innocent ounce, infinite innocent days and nights with no sleep, 20 mins unconsciousness in between and repeat. Got fired from work last week, understandably enough, so money is going to become a problem very soon and my skin is getting bad.
So where does that leave me? Jobless, penniless, unhealthy and in a foreign country. Staring at a mound of powder the size of my fist and wondering where the hell I am going to find work...

But here's why I was unsure if this was the right forum. I'm ok with this. Can anyone explain that? I know my life's a mess but it bothers me very little, probably because of the drink and drugs! No winning eh?

Anyway, I dont need advice or help or anything just I read here quite a lot and it really can't be said enough. You guys are absolutely fantastic. Always helpful, always nice and always informative. You guys really do aid in helping keep people safe especially when it comes to opiates and benzo's and the like. Speaking of which, the heroin threads are some of the most engrossing and unreal drug literature I have ever read, they frighten me to my very core, thankfully. But I digress... In all the times I have visited I have never left once without learning at least one new thing

So just wanted to say a very big thank you long may it continue! Stay safe, peace, love and unity.

 

[DroneLore]

I think that when the times comes for you to buckle down and be sober, you'll know it. I've been abstaining from drugs for almost five weeks (barring a beer here and there...I aint perfect), but it's only because I have a pending court case. Every day I wish I hadn't been arrested so I could keep drugging.

 

[fucteh]

When the time comes. I've been saying ill get some sense some day since I was 15. That was 10 years ago. Good luck with the court case dude.

Gonna smoke my last bit of green (pointless) then go through the motions of goin to bed for the comfortnessness value. At least its a step in the right direction and sniffing stimulents in bed is a strange concept... theres a joke or an album or a song or somthing there to be written somewhere..

If im up again in an hour whacking out lines please forgive me

 

[fucteh]

Went to bed 8 times. Didn't sleep. After 18? hours of reading BL the world is just one big drugs forum, interesting place.

Fed, showered, shaved, and in pretty good form. Time for some Friday night socialising.

Enjoy the weekend guys.

 

[gavatron@oz]

hey there fucteh.
Im in a similar boat as you.luckily still have my job,but i use at work to be able to make it through the day after 3-4 nights and days up. Stalking the threads on BL wide eyed has become my specialty.

Its meth i use,smoke not snort,so its a bit mire addictive, though i do eat and rail simetimes for a bit if variety. Luckily gears not too cheap down under.. With the prices in north America,im almost certain id be dead if i lived there.

Telling mysef ill quit for years,but the mind debates over power my will power. Ive hit rock bottom a few times,no $,no where to live,no job--from coke.moved home..got sorted out, only to be heading there again.

Broke engagement off with fiance 2 weeks ago,i basically chose drugs,and she wouldnt stick by me through withdrawal.said i could go tnrough it better alone.lol.all that meant was i didnt have to hide it.

Up since wednesday morning,its 4am sat morning.got work in 3 hours...

Just pisting so u know your not alone.. Take it easy with the pile.it could still get a whole lot worse..

 

[fucteh]

Please do not take this the wrong way mate but at the moment I am not in the same boat. But I fully understand thats its a very slippery slope to get to that place and do not wish to anybody to suffer that shit.

I have done meth a few times at different occations but for whatever reason never binged and always insufflated. Its just NOT the same as high doses of your average street white paste/powder eastern european speed. Which is much more desireable to me personally. Meth makes me proper twitchy even snorting tiny amounts I couldnt even imagine smoking it (this isnt to say I wont change my mind next week)


Anyway, I proper appreciate you posting mate you're a good soul and dont forget it.
You already know this but please stay away from the gear dude. Is there a doc you can go and see? anybody sympathetic that doesnt do drugs? Just someone to chat to about things can make a big difference.

If you ever want anyone to chat about stuff or just pure nonsense or just a sympathetic ear just hit me up dude, I would be more than happy to. One Love