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Am I Insane?

I

infectedmushroom

Bluelighter
Joined
Mar 14, 2007
Messages
1,371
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the bridge, OZ land
So I posted a story over in Trip Reports where I described meeting this girl then taking some MDxx, (she took two pills aswell) and basically becoming completely crazy about her after only one night.

Is it unrealistic or foolish to think it could be possible i've found love at first sight? Hell, i'm not sure what love even is, i'm only 19, but whatever I felt that night and in the past few days is unlike ANYTHING i've ever felt before in my life. And I could swear, she felt the same thing.

I guess what i'm really asking is, how much should I take into account the fact that I was on mdma? Is it possible it blurred my perception of love, feeling and emotion? I've rolled a fair few times before and had never felt an emotion so powerful, and these weren't even top quality pills. Is it possible in such a loved up, egoless state to simply "click" with someone on such a profound level? I'm only asking this because i've never experienced anything like this before!

Anyway in the past few days to reassure myself that i'm not %100 crazy I watched maybe 10-15 video's posted by women and men on youtube around the subject "how to tell if she likes you.." to reconcile what happened. They all more or less reported the same verbal and non verbal signs, and my eyes literally lit up as I remembered the exact moment(S!) I caught her doing these things. I'm not sure, in one way I feel secure enough with my own judgement that she really felt the same way, but in another, I just don't know because I haven't/can't ask her just yet how she feels (it's complex, involving a close friend of mine.) I don't know if what I experienced was just some drug enduced dream (or is love LIKE a dream anyway...??) 8(

But anyway i'm sure in every single video I answered "yes" to %90 of the signs mentioned, giving me hope i'm not delusional.

Please help me! I'm a young'un and I can't stop thinking about her, I literally feel like I need to act NOW to get her, I need guidance before I screw this up with the wrong ideas in my head.

Thank you, peace and love <3
 
go after her but realise it was drug induced feelings of heightened emotion. real love for the most part is more subtle and caring than the intense instant connection feeling that mdma induces with regularity.

go get her but be reasonable and keep your cool
 
pofacedhoe said:
go after her but realise it was drug induced feelings of heightened emotion. real love for the most part is more subtle and caring than the intense instant connection feeling that mdma induces with regularity.

go get her but be reasonable and keep your cool
Click to expand...

definitely agree with this - you may have noticed her doing these non verbal signs, but were they in clusters??(this is KEY)
 
I think all you can do is go meet up with her, without the mdma..
and see how you guys click then?

Right??
What else could you do?

Good luck!
<3token
 
It could go either way.
YES I can pretty much guarantee that the drug is what has made these feelings happen.
I remember the bond that I felt with some people ... yet I can't remember some of their names.
BUT that being said, there is still a chance it could work. BUT hang out with her sober and see how it goes. I find that MDMA helps my relationship with my boyfriend, well we don't have problems or anything, but MDMA helps us open up even more, and bond even more. Our relationship is pretty strong sober too! Aha.
But hang out with her, don't get your hopes up too high, but just go for it, and see how things go :)
 
You may have found attraction at first sight, but true "love" takes understanding of the person to develop. Did she share her secret likes/dislikes/hobbies with you? Did you tell her any of yours? Visual cues and hints may be great to get into bed, but a lasting relationship depends on the two of you knowing how the other one functions on the inside, which I don't think can be translated in an MDMA love-fest.

Like, if you had to pick a restaurant to take her out to, do you even know what kind of food she likes? Favorite color? The specific reason that hamsters are so damn cute for her? (for me: it's the way they stuff their cheeks with food) Knowing these little things are the real foundation of love. Not "how she brushed her autumn-colored hair over her perfect ear before reaching for her drink", although that certainly helps get the ball rolling.

Go get her and get to know her, but do not assume that "love at first sight" is possible without some real effort by BOTH of your to understand each others' complexities.
 
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I met my ex boyfriend at a rave when we were both extremely high on mdma. It started off by my telling him I liked his shirt and him giving me a candy bracelet haha. And then I lost his phone..and a hunt ensued. But we both exchanged numbers after that anyways, and he called me the next morning. We proceeded to start seeing eachothersoon after. It was a 4 month long relationship that was very real, mdma or not.

I wouldn't write your experience off at all, but at the same time I've met people while rolling where the next day I'm thinking..."what the fuck was I DOING!?"
It could potentially exaggerate a real connection between two people, or formulate a synthetic one between two people.

:) go for it!
 
greenmeanies said:
You may have found attraction at first sight, but true "love" takes understanding of the person to develop.
Click to expand...
for you, perhaps. and for many others, sure. maybe love is different for him?

op, i think it's likely that your feelings in this case are clouded by the magic of mdma but only one person can define what love means to you. and that's you.

:)

alasdair
 
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