Nah, I don't need pity. It's not like I was horribly depressed for all 15 years, it comes and goes. Thx tho.
I may check that out.
I have and the depression's still there. That's why other measures like working out ultimately haven't been able to stop me for good.
AA, no. It's a cult and makes people dwell on their addiction imo. Therapist maybe. I am able to exercise but when I'm depressed I just choose not to. Hard to get yourself to the gym if you don't even feel like getting out of bed. As far as relationships I've pretty much given up hope on that. I don't think there's anyone out there that can put up with me. If someone came along fine, but it's not something I'm actively pursuing. If I had to go through one more failed relationship I probably would just off myself or drink myself to death.
I'm not afraid at all to give sober living another, try. I'm afraid that it won't be any different, my depression will get the better of me and I'll be back to self medicating again. Hell, alcoholism isn't even the problem really, it's just the symptom of a bigger one. If that was the problem that would be easy.
I know what you mean about when you're depressed it's hard to go work out. Shit, it's hard to even peel myself out of bed, it's hard to shower or shave, or brush my teeth. I neglect feeding myself. It takes all the energy in me just to feed my cat. But when I'm feeling like this, and I do force myself through it, I feel so much better. Try going for a short walk outside. The worst thing that can happen is you make it to the front door and you just turn around. This happened to me a lot in the past, when I was suffering from agoraphobia.
Maybe try watching comedy films? I normally don't enjoy comedy as much but it can be nice to have something to put a smile on your face
I'm sorry to hear about your past relationships which did not work out. Needless to say, I'm on my second major relationship. The last one I was in ended
horribly. Cops were called, charges filed, domestic violence, drug addiction, mental disorders, family drama, tears, and you want to know what? I still wasn't happy being single after all of this. I learned that I have to work on myself for relationships to work out for the best, and that I am not perfect. The last person I was with had too many issues, and I wasn't to blame for many of them. However, what I have learned recently is that I am partially to blame for what I went through, because I haven't set rational, reasonable boundaries with others. I'm not blaming you for anything that's happened in the past, but if you want to have future relationships which work, I really recommend learning more about healthy relationships, and what you can do to ensure a good one in the future. It's also 100% OK to be single and live on your own, but my question is, are you happy doing that?
When you said "I'm afraid that it won't be any different, my depression will get the better of me" - I know what you mean. This is what I feared the most, not that I couldn't quit, but that I couldn't be happy. When I quit using heroin, and had 3 weeks clean (no suboxone use at this point in my life), I got through the acute withdrawals but I was so bored and depressed, I couldn't enjoy anything. There's going to be a period of anhedonia we go through during withdrawal but it does eventually subside.
Glad to hear your stomach is feeling better man