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Am I Bi? Does my wife suspect it? How do I tell her?

First of all, I personally think it's useless to put labels on things - it won't mean much if you decide to call yourself "bi", in my opinion.
For instance, I've fantasized about women before but would not act on it because I do'nt particularly want to; so I'm not "bi", per se, but I'm not really straight either.

As far as your wife goes...I guess it sort of depends on whether you feel this is such an important part of your life right now that you really have to share it with her. Maybe ask her hypothetical questions about the matter ("I saw this tv show where...") and judge her reaction?
 
Ho chi minh what do u mean possible troll? What i said is pretty straight forward. If u want a cock in you're arse that makes u gay in my book.
 
Ronnie84 said:
Ho chi minh what do u mean possible troll? What i said is pretty straight forward. If u want a cock in you're arse that makes u gay in my book.
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he wants it in his mouth. obviously you can't read properly or you would have also seen the discussion on the broad spectrum of bi-sexuality that has been presented in this thread so far...
 
Is it the physical act of having the penis in your mouth and going through the oral sex motions that turns you on? Or is it more the idea of causing pleasure for a male that does it? I ask because you might want to try and see if your wife would put on a strap-on and allow you to perform oral sex on it. The may (or may not, but may...) satisfy your curiosity enough. Again, this assumes that your wife would be comfortable with that idea in the first place, but it's one additional thing you could try before you go off and hook up with an actual man.
 
RedLeader said:
Is it the physical act of having the penis in your mouth and going through the oral sex motions that turns you on? Or is it more the idea of causing pleasure for a male that does it? I ask because you might want to try and see if your wife would put on a strap-on and allow you to perform oral sex on it. The may (or may not, but may...) satisfy your curiosity enough. Again, this assumes that your wife would be comfortable with that idea in the first place, but it's one additional thing you could try before you go off and hook up with an actual man.
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you could also see if shes interested in a threesome with another man you both find compatible. conservative people are still sexual beings and though she may have been brought up thinking certain things are "wrong" or "immoral" or whatever she may be able to come out of that shell and explore your sexuality as a couple who loves each other while also exploring her own. a serious discussion with your wife is in order.
 
Hi! I know this thread is old, but I came across it while doing some research into this same topic. In my situation, my wife knows I'm bi. We have shared a man in the past (it happened spontaneously and we both enjoyed it immensely). However, he was a very good friend of both of ours. We have never spoken much about how much I enjoyed performing and receiving fellatio from him, nor has much been said about me penetrating him. I don't know if she was okay with it because she was having sex with him as well or if she actually enjoyed watching him and me doing things together. I feel like the only reason she allowed it, was his having been our friend for so long and she was attracted to him.

My issue is that now, 10 years later, I REALLY want to have sex with a man again, either with her participating or on my own. My urge to have sex with another man is becoming overwhelming and I'm worried I'll do something impulsive and damage my 19 year marriage. I'm really at loss as to how to say "I want cock again". It may sound ridiculous to some, but I want to so it so bad, I've been having anxiety attacks and depression is setting in.

I'm curious as to whether or not you finally spoke with your wife and how your conversation went.
 
Mulatto_Matt said:
Hi! I know this thread is old, but I came across it while doing some research into this same topic. In my situation, my wife knows I'm bi. We have shared a man in the past (it happened spontaneously and we both enjoyed it immensely). However, he was a very good friend of both of ours. We have never spoken much about how much I enjoyed performing and receiving fellatio from him, nor has much been said about me penetrating him. I don't know if she was okay with it because she was having sex with him as well or if she actually enjoyed watching him and me doing things together. I feel like the only reason she allowed it, was his having been our friend for so long and she was attracted to him.

My issue is that now, 10 years later, I REALLY want to have sex with a man again, either with her participating or on my own. My urge to have sex with another man is becoming overwhelming and I'm worried I'll do something impulsive and damage my 19 year marriage. I'm really at loss as to how to say "I want cock again". It may sound ridiculous to some, but I want to so it so bad, I've been having anxiety attacks and depression is setting in.

I'm curious as to whether or not you finally spoke with your wife and how your conversation went.
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Talk to your wife, and tell her what you wrote here how you want to have sex with another man either with your wife there and you all having sex together, or without her. Good luck.
 
She was there when you had sex with another man... so I am pretty much sure she is well aware that you like have sex with other men.

So simply tell her like you are talking to us about it. A lot of girls are turned on by such things... but also many are not. But you already have history of doing it.

You should always be able to talk to your wife about anything... no?
 
How did the original threesome occur? Was it spontaneous or planned? Maybe you should talk about it with her of doing it again. Also try some toys for her to use on you.
 
My ex-wife would have never allowed it. My current girlfriend knew I was bi from the outset... not that anything has come from it, other than her perceiving everyone (not just women) as a danger. She has fucked me with a strapon before, which is pretty open minded, and she found she liked the role reversal.

If you are truly bi as I am, it's much easier for a woman to 'be a man' than the other way around (I like tits, pussy and ass way too much to be solely with a man - that would have to be an open relationship).

Talk with her about it.
 
tomdpimp said:
How did the original threesome occur? Was it spontaneous or planned? Maybe you should talk about it with her of doing it again. Also try some toys for her to use on you.
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The threesome was spontaneous. Alcohol and hormones. We tried the toys, I don't like being penetrated and I certainly don't want to suck on a dildo.
 
No way could I give up women. I want sex with both. My wife fulfills my need for women, but I want men too. The whole strap on thing didn't work for me. I don't want to receive.
 
I'm sure there are groups, okcupid and other services that have MFM bi-sex meetups of some sort.
 
Most men are bi, but don't let that fact cause you to come out as bi to your wife, which is almost always a big mistake and sometimes even grounds for a divorce! Male homosexuality with men who have female partners only works successfully in societies where the butt fucking and cock sucking is kept strictly secret from the females, who will drive themselves crazy if they find out.
 
Dresden said:
Most men are bi, but don't let that fact cause you to come out as bi to your wife, which is almost always a big mistake and sometimes even grounds for a divorce! Male homosexuality with men who have female partners only works successfully in societies where the butt fucking and cock sucking is kept strictly secret from the females, who will drive themselves crazy if they find out.
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Which societies are these where this goes on? Or do you mean gay men who marry women intentionally when they know they're gay and they basically never have sex with a woman or very rarely do maybe like 1-2X in a year, and they cheat on their "wife" with a lot of men?
 
Mulatto_Matt said:
Hi! I know this thread is old, but I came across it while doing some research into this same topic. In my situation, my wife knows I'm bi. We have shared a man in the past (it happened spontaneously and we both enjoyed it immensely). However, he was a very good friend of both of ours. We have never spoken much about how much I enjoyed performing and receiving fellatio from him, nor has much been said about me penetrating him. I don't know if she was okay with it because she was having sex with him as well or if she actually enjoyed watching him and me doing things together. I feel like the only reason she allowed it, was his having been our friend for so long and she was attracted to him.

My issue is that now, 10 years later, I REALLY want to have sex with a man again, either with her participating or on my own. My urge to have sex with another man is becoming overwhelming and I'm worried I'll do something impulsive and damage my 19 year marriage. I'm really at loss as to how to say "I want cock again". It may sound ridiculous to some, but I want to so it so bad, I've been having anxiety attacks and depression is setting in.

I'm curious as to whether or not you finally spoke with your wife and how your conversation went.
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Why don't you just reminisce with her when you guys are drunk again... like remember that time we had a threesome..?? It was soo hot. I've been thinking about it lately and would love to try it again sometime...

Hopefully she says yes! :)
 
PriestTheyCalledHim said:
Which societies are these where this goes on? Or do you mean gay men who marry women intentionally when they know they're gay and they basically never have sex with a woman or very rarely do maybe like 1-2X in a year, and they cheat on their "wife" with a lot of men?
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Well, I mean honestly many married men--who generally consider themselves straight in spite of their sexual orientations--fuck other men occasionally or even often in every society around the world throughout history and usually keep it a secret for good reason, but the society I specifically read about was the Aztecs in Mexico, I believe, who were said to have been taught how to sodomize each other effectively by aliens.
 
Dresden said:
Well, I mean honestly many married men--who generally consider themselves straight in spite of their sexual orientations--fuck other men occasionally or even often in every society around the world throughout history and usually keep it a secret for good reason, but the society I specifically read about was the Aztecs in Mexico, I believe, who were said to have been taught how to sodomize each other effectively by aliens.
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Which aliens taught them how to do anal sex? I read about how anal sex was depicted in ancient Inca artwork, and that people would use it as birth control then.
 
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