NotSoAnonymous
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jan 28, 2015
- Messages
- 11
Howdy. Well so far I've failed to come across a drug forum/thing that isn't full of judgemental assholes so uh here I am. I've been a lurker for some time now but figured I'd finally make an account. I'm just gonna be rather blunt and throw some stuff out here.
I spent about two years selling, growing and smoking weed on a daily basis as a source of income, something to do, and a way of coping with my various mental conditions.
I later stopped selling, abandoned the people I did it with, and decided it was all just too much bullshit after my crop got stolen and I guess my buddy stabbed someone with a pair of pliers. Normally I would've just remained neutral as long as he didn't drag me into some kind of murder case but I ended up deciding to leave that whole area and just start buying from dealers in a no-strings-attached sort of relationship.
I spent a few more months as one of the biggest potheads in town. It was fun but it began taking up too much of my time and money (I live in a very shitty, drug-infested town with little to no employment options so its hard to come by cash.)
For about six months I've cut down immensely on the weed. I smoke somewhat regularly but I don't think I could kill a quarter pound massive hookah bowl in one sitting anymore. However I began experimenting with other drugs.
I began abusing my Ativan (Lorazepam) very often as of five months ago. I found it to be much more satisfying and intense to just crush and snort them, so it was rare that I would actually take them orally. I also was a regular user of DXM (Not really a drug, I know, but it did the trick) for quite a while but at ten bucks a bottle for Delsym and two bottles for a decent trip, I stopped using it.
After an attempted suicide I found I could get beyond fucked up using Diphenhydramine (benadryl and most non prescription sleep aids.) After a couple weeks of daily use I began relying on it more and more to cope with depression, anxiety and whatever else I have that my shitty doctors haven't bothered to diagnose.
As of three months ago I've become somewhat of a junkie. Xanax, Vicodin, still using the DPH once in a while but no longer 'addicted,' and pretty much whatever else I can get my hands on. Anorexia has been added to my growing list of issues.
As of right now I'm still using whatever I can and basically just waiting till I OD one of these days and don't wake up. It seems depressing but I'm actually happier than I've ever been. I find comfort in whatever drugs im using at the time and I really don't care enough to do much else other than what i need to in order to keep a steady living environment. I'm hoping I can be accepted here and just be active on a forum that has people somewhat like myself (in the drug situation anyway) that will talk about it / give advice when needed without the "You're gonna die there's help out there go to rehab don't do drugs" bullshit.
TL;DR I'm a junkie, not afraid to admit it, and hope I can commune with fellow users because you guys seem cool :D Adios and see you on the forums.
With love, NotSoAnonymous
I spent about two years selling, growing and smoking weed on a daily basis as a source of income, something to do, and a way of coping with my various mental conditions.
I later stopped selling, abandoned the people I did it with, and decided it was all just too much bullshit after my crop got stolen and I guess my buddy stabbed someone with a pair of pliers. Normally I would've just remained neutral as long as he didn't drag me into some kind of murder case but I ended up deciding to leave that whole area and just start buying from dealers in a no-strings-attached sort of relationship.
I spent a few more months as one of the biggest potheads in town. It was fun but it began taking up too much of my time and money (I live in a very shitty, drug-infested town with little to no employment options so its hard to come by cash.)
For about six months I've cut down immensely on the weed. I smoke somewhat regularly but I don't think I could kill a quarter pound massive hookah bowl in one sitting anymore. However I began experimenting with other drugs.
I began abusing my Ativan (Lorazepam) very often as of five months ago. I found it to be much more satisfying and intense to just crush and snort them, so it was rare that I would actually take them orally. I also was a regular user of DXM (Not really a drug, I know, but it did the trick) for quite a while but at ten bucks a bottle for Delsym and two bottles for a decent trip, I stopped using it.
After an attempted suicide I found I could get beyond fucked up using Diphenhydramine (benadryl and most non prescription sleep aids.) After a couple weeks of daily use I began relying on it more and more to cope with depression, anxiety and whatever else I have that my shitty doctors haven't bothered to diagnose.
As of three months ago I've become somewhat of a junkie. Xanax, Vicodin, still using the DPH once in a while but no longer 'addicted,' and pretty much whatever else I can get my hands on. Anorexia has been added to my growing list of issues.
As of right now I'm still using whatever I can and basically just waiting till I OD one of these days and don't wake up. It seems depressing but I'm actually happier than I've ever been. I find comfort in whatever drugs im using at the time and I really don't care enough to do much else other than what i need to in order to keep a steady living environment. I'm hoping I can be accepted here and just be active on a forum that has people somewhat like myself (in the drug situation anyway) that will talk about it / give advice when needed without the "You're gonna die there's help out there go to rehab don't do drugs" bullshit.
TL;DR I'm a junkie, not afraid to admit it, and hope I can commune with fellow users because you guys seem cool :D Adios and see you on the forums.
With love, NotSoAnonymous
