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Alcoholism Discussion Thread Version 7.0

^ I think we are survivors, after all that we have gone through, all the phases we had to live until we get that light, that force that makes us keep going forward. When I look backwards I see that I had plenty of opportunities to have stopped, but it's never that simple. Even I could go back in time, I believe I'd still had those feelings that prevented me to go further. It takes time until we really know what we want and when we are willing to do it at all costs.
 
I agree Erikmen. I can look back too but it's never that simple. Until that light comes into out hreatts and its heals and the bad shit is gone. Good stuff to ref elect on. Sometimes I question whether I'm out or not. Something persona I have to figure out. Thanks for the cool post Erikmen
 
I get annoyed when people slam a program like AA, also when they say that you WILL relapse if you stop going. Everyone is different, and the reason we drink is also different. Unfortunately, none of us are able to see the cause for our disease until we are no longer suffering in the sickness.
The only thing that matters to each one of us is that we have found something that works. I enjoy my time on BlueLight because hearing others relate their stories helps to remind me that getting drunk will not make me feel any better, and I get that knowledge without having another hangover. This is AA for me.
 
^ Indeed, it's mostly about sharing experiences to people you know that won't judge you, but instead share similar problems. I have heard that AA started after two 'former drunks' started to meet regularly and that experience kept them stronger somehow. It changed their lives.

@closeau, I don't think we are ever out. Perhaps we become a different person as you mentioned. Not the person we used to be before, no doubts. Getting over requires efforts but maybe some of us become more serious about life in general, we know what it matters and get used to struggle silently. Maturer but still content, and proud. Perhaps more tolerant, strong, sentient. I think most of us have this scar that only few people can see.
 
Haha, I like that. I have a huge scar only is few can see. That's awesome. All the things you said I agree with Erikmen. You surely are a very wise man!!
 
I finally did it I made a year without ggetting another drunk in public, hopefully I can continue with this. I'd like to think I'm through going to jail
 
I was getting arrested a lot for public drinking, but since I stopped that I haven't been to jail in about a year
 
Well that's good. Why do you seem so sad if I may ask? I never got at reseated for publcbintonxicatin but I got a few tickets in my day. Are you ok?
 
I'm not to sad, after 3 or 4 years of thinking it was never going to get better, things are pretty stable I'm off the streets and staying out of jail. The trade off is I'm pretty isolated and never talk to anyone.
 
glitter-kiss, I am so happy to see you here. <3 I'll be honest, your previous fatalism scared me. I am so happy that you are off the streets and especially that you are no longer being subjected to jail. Is the isolation anxiety related?
 
The isolation is because of my living arrangements . I'm taking care of my grandma, and she lives not to far from the store but it's still like 20 min each way on bike to the liquor store . But things are all a lot better than last year
 
Just chiming in my experience here. Definitely struggle to not drink everyday and I seem to get lucky with withdrawals as I mainly only get anxiety and I sweat in my sleep (a lot, feels like waking in a bathtub not a bed!.. Though often I do get insomnia for days on end so I'll lay there feeling the sweat build up and I just lie there feeling like an idiot) so my problem stopping is mainly just willpower. Wish I had more.

Looking for advice on coming off alcohol though relating to my GP/drug services. Being winter and waking up at 4am covered in sweat and nervous is doable but it really is pretty horrible. My GP gave me Oxazepam at first which was so weak I had the whole bottle in 2 nights and it didn't even stop the sweating or insomnia. I didn't even ask for more next visit but was asked if it worked and I said no, so I was given temazepam which I found weaker than Oxazepam which doesn't make any sense to me! I was told to use 20mg max but I ended up taking 150mg and I still had all the withdrawals but I did fall asleep within 3 hours rather than say 5 or none at all.

So, does anyone have any advice what I should say to my Dr? I don't want to be labelled a drug seeker but I do want something that will work. I've done a detox in the past and the Valium I was given was barely enough to do anything at all. I think I'll be suggested to do an inpatient detox again if I say temazepam didn't work. I honestly just want something that will work, would it be bad to ask for Librium? I ask because I've heard it works well for withdrawal but isn't all that capable for abuse? Are there many or any good withdrawal drugs that are not considered to have a high potential for abuse? I don't want to ask for any drugs, I don't need that on my record.

Cheers.
 
From the experience of those close friends that have gone through the process, it seems Valium was the one chosen by their doctor, however for a very limited amount of time in order to prevent further damages. I know it's not your case, but apparently a lot of people do change their 'addictions' and benzo is really a bad one to come off as we all know.

Good luck and all the best!
 
Librium would be a good one to ask for. It's a generally weak benzo but not does it help with alcohol withdrawals. The ER gave me some several times and it always worked great. I don't think you'll be labeled a drug seeker if you ask for Librium. Try it. Worst they can say is no. It cools the inner heat of withdrawal. Other than that I have no suggestions except stay hydrated and get plenty of rest. Oh yeah, don't drink anymore. I know it's hard but it's doable. Use this site as support. We'll get ya thru. Good luck!!
 
I've been sober for full 3 months now, and I'm doing fine, except that I sometimes see nightmares where I drink and get into trouble.

I think I may be gradually starting to see how my alcohol addiction was distorting my thinking during the years of my active alcoholism. I was sometimes rationalizing my addict behavior by saying that I had a hard childhood, or that I wasn't treated appropriately 10 years ago when I had a psychotic breakdown. Today I heard that my old friend's 7-year-old daughter has lymphatic cancer :(. The doctors think she will survive, but anyway, thinking about that makes it sound like thick bull if I said that I had an excessively hard time when I was a child. Yesterday I watched a documentary about the thalidomide catastrophe from Netflix, and that made me see how many people are born a lot more disadvantaged than I was, and still most of them don't become addicts.
 
I just think if your exposed to it be it a drug or alcohol and like it that what makes you an addict. To say certain people are predisposed to become addicts is stupid. If you put something in your body and you like it that's what makes you an addict, not genetics. People in 3rd world countries don't have as much chance to become addicted cause they can't get stuff. Here in US you can start getting fucked up as early age you want to. Full blown addicts by 16. Drs and pharmaceutical companies need to get off their ass and treat these addicts with medical care and medicine. Most addiction comes from a bad decision to try something to see how it feels. How do we stop that?
 
Speaking of documentaries, I watched one about kids in Afghanistan as young as 8-9 years old completely abandoned and getting high night and day under a bridge full of trash and diseases. They were constantly getting beat up by police.

They filmed young mothers smoking heroin or opiates with their 6 year daughters. The kids were dirty, their fingers really heart. Totally beaten up. Some of these kids lived with older man who would sleep with them at night and give money for shooting up during the day. It was very shocking, I didn't even finish watching.
 
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