potato
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 14, 2004
- Messages
- 910
THE SCENE:
Wednesday night.
Despite having a Japanese presentation the next morning that I haven't finished preparing for, I plan on going to a free comedy night at uni with some friends. The Jap thing would have been done the night before but I ended up going to a Fantomas concert on the spur of the moment (which was FUCKing unreal!) and writing a draft at 1am when I got home.
So I go to comedy with a friend that has just got back from o/s, haven't seen them in a year. Get reasonably pissed on $2 cans of VB. I sit back at our table and enjoy the awesome comedy on offer. This finishes at about 10pm, and I say my goodbyes and head to the tram stop. Being mildly pissed (I'd had approximately 6-8 cans in the 3 hours so not much) I was talking to anyone and everyone at the tram stop.
THE BEGINNING:
Tram comes, I get on, and continue the conversation. A few stops later an attractive young girl walks up to me and leans over, and says close to my ear "My friend over there thinks that you're one of the most attractive men she's ever seen." I look up and see another girl, dark hair, dark eyes, looking at me.
Not at all phased by any of this, I start conversation with them. A few stops later they have to get off. I'm mid-sentence and still pissed so I hop off too. After getting off they inform me that they've come out to this neck of the woods to buy some weed to 'bring back the buzz' of their pills. Yep, they were on ecstasy. On a Wednesday night. Somewhat random.
Anyway, within moments of getting off the tram, one of them realises that she cant find her wallet. She's really upset and frantic, and we quickly return to the stop they got on at and check all around for it. It's not there. The girls are pretty upset, not really sure what to do. There's another tram coming, heading back up in my direction. We get on it, and I feel sorry for them, dont want their night to be ruined (plus they seem pretty cool), so I invite them round to my place where I have a few spare pills - they can have half of one each.
THE CRAZINESS:
We get back to mine and I give them a pill, they split it between them. I dont have anything, cos that would be crazy. After all, I have uni tomorrow and a Jap presentation at 11. We sit out on the back porch talking and smoking. After a while we go into my bungalow and listen to music. I decide to do some, not much, just a litttle pebble that had chipped off one of the pills. I crush it up and snort it, expecting it not to do anything. 15-20 minutes later I come on surprisingly noticeably. It feels really good.
We go through my music collection, they find tonnes of stuff we'd like to listen to. Through the course of the night we must have changed CDs dozens of times. They are talking, and writing stuff in a little notebook. I'm sitting and enjoying, talking, listening to the good music.
I'm not sure at what point I decided to do more, but I suspect it was around midnight, perhaps a little later, that I crushed up half a pill and snorted it. 10-15 mins later I felt strong effects, body rushes, and that awesome feeling where all your musles seem to be stretching out comfortably, and you just feel so GOOD. I'm a little worried about tomorrow, I know what I've done is crazy (and v v self destructive. Hi 1234
). But that's not enough to stop me having an unreal time.
Each CD exhausts itself and is replaced in turn, conversation shifts and winds around hundreds of interesting topics. Around 2 or 3am one of the girls suggests that we share one final pill between the 3 of us. This seems like a good idea at the time, so i get one more, crush it up and we spend the next half hour snorting lines, spacing them out as we feel.
At this point I actually am quite worried about my presentation. I have written it but I need to make the corrections the sensee has made for me. So I get on my computer (which was already on and logged in to bluelight to show them it. In fact one of them even created an account that night. Anyway, there I am, peaking off my tits, trying to do homework at 3am. My eyes can barely focus on the screen, everything is a little blurry. But somehow I manage to make the changes.
It's getting kinda cold now so we all go into my bedroom with the heater, and curl up on the bed. No one feels like sleeping though. Time goes very quickly as the hours pass crazily. Finally i fall asleep around 7am.
THE CONSEQUENCES:
I wake up around 9:30, felling foggy but much better for the sleep. The girls are gone, there's just a note with a number. I know I can do this presentation, at least I'm not going to miss it entirely. I jump outta bed and head into uni, print out the corrected version. I sit outside my class before it starts and try and memorize it. I even have time to get the sensee to correct the new version - I'd misread some of her corrections, writing ya where she'd written ka. So that was lucky.
At 11 I go in for the class, nervous as all hell. My pupils are still somewhat dilated FFS. Anyway, I think I culd have pulled it off, but as I stood up there, waiting for my turn, the person before me was just so damn GOOD, so much better than mine, that I felt this terrible sinking in my stomach, and i felt even more nervous.
Normally public speaking is easy for me. But when my turn came, I had the worst attack of nerves in possibly my entire life. My hands were shaking, my legs felt like they would buckle. I stammered and stuttered over every second word. When I was finished I felt like crying, but reasoned that at least I'd done it, and would get SOME marks.
So yeah, i thought, what i'd done that night was incredibly stupid, but boy was it fun. I wasn't upset or regretful - I saw the consequences of my actions and was willing to accept them.
I msged the number they'd left me to say thanks for the night, but the person msgs back to say i must have the wrong number. Strange. But then later that day when I went home and checked what was left of my stash after the big night - I couldn't find anything. Oh fuck. What a fool I feel. How badly I feel I was taken advantage of. At first I cant believe it - who could do that to a person that had done nothing but look out for them, give them free drugs, talk with on a meaningful level, spend a night with. I couldn't believe it, but I had to accept it - too much just added up - them being gone when I woke, the number being wrong, and of course, it all being gone.
THE FINAL CHAPTER:
I guess I'm more hurt than angry. Hopefully I can learn from this. Better yet I can find them and they can explain to me why they did it. Not that that's very likely. Although I DO have an email address of one of them, thanks to the Bluelight signup (is there anything BL can't do?!) I've emailed her a non-confrontational email asking if they know where i might have left my pills. I don't expect a reply. Oh well, they were only drugs - not important at all. It just sucks feeling so dumb, so naive, so used.
Wednesday night.
Despite having a Japanese presentation the next morning that I haven't finished preparing for, I plan on going to a free comedy night at uni with some friends. The Jap thing would have been done the night before but I ended up going to a Fantomas concert on the spur of the moment (which was FUCKing unreal!) and writing a draft at 1am when I got home.
So I go to comedy with a friend that has just got back from o/s, haven't seen them in a year. Get reasonably pissed on $2 cans of VB. I sit back at our table and enjoy the awesome comedy on offer. This finishes at about 10pm, and I say my goodbyes and head to the tram stop. Being mildly pissed (I'd had approximately 6-8 cans in the 3 hours so not much) I was talking to anyone and everyone at the tram stop.
THE BEGINNING:
Tram comes, I get on, and continue the conversation. A few stops later an attractive young girl walks up to me and leans over, and says close to my ear "My friend over there thinks that you're one of the most attractive men she's ever seen." I look up and see another girl, dark hair, dark eyes, looking at me.
Not at all phased by any of this, I start conversation with them. A few stops later they have to get off. I'm mid-sentence and still pissed so I hop off too. After getting off they inform me that they've come out to this neck of the woods to buy some weed to 'bring back the buzz' of their pills. Yep, they were on ecstasy. On a Wednesday night. Somewhat random.
Anyway, within moments of getting off the tram, one of them realises that she cant find her wallet. She's really upset and frantic, and we quickly return to the stop they got on at and check all around for it. It's not there. The girls are pretty upset, not really sure what to do. There's another tram coming, heading back up in my direction. We get on it, and I feel sorry for them, dont want their night to be ruined (plus they seem pretty cool), so I invite them round to my place where I have a few spare pills - they can have half of one each.
THE CRAZINESS:
We get back to mine and I give them a pill, they split it between them. I dont have anything, cos that would be crazy. After all, I have uni tomorrow and a Jap presentation at 11. We sit out on the back porch talking and smoking. After a while we go into my bungalow and listen to music. I decide to do some, not much, just a litttle pebble that had chipped off one of the pills. I crush it up and snort it, expecting it not to do anything. 15-20 minutes later I come on surprisingly noticeably. It feels really good.
We go through my music collection, they find tonnes of stuff we'd like to listen to. Through the course of the night we must have changed CDs dozens of times. They are talking, and writing stuff in a little notebook. I'm sitting and enjoying, talking, listening to the good music.
I'm not sure at what point I decided to do more, but I suspect it was around midnight, perhaps a little later, that I crushed up half a pill and snorted it. 10-15 mins later I felt strong effects, body rushes, and that awesome feeling where all your musles seem to be stretching out comfortably, and you just feel so GOOD. I'm a little worried about tomorrow, I know what I've done is crazy (and v v self destructive. Hi 1234
). But that's not enough to stop me having an unreal time.Each CD exhausts itself and is replaced in turn, conversation shifts and winds around hundreds of interesting topics. Around 2 or 3am one of the girls suggests that we share one final pill between the 3 of us. This seems like a good idea at the time, so i get one more, crush it up and we spend the next half hour snorting lines, spacing them out as we feel.
At this point I actually am quite worried about my presentation. I have written it but I need to make the corrections the sensee has made for me. So I get on my computer (which was already on and logged in to bluelight to show them it. In fact one of them even created an account that night. Anyway, there I am, peaking off my tits, trying to do homework at 3am. My eyes can barely focus on the screen, everything is a little blurry. But somehow I manage to make the changes.
It's getting kinda cold now so we all go into my bedroom with the heater, and curl up on the bed. No one feels like sleeping though. Time goes very quickly as the hours pass crazily. Finally i fall asleep around 7am.
THE CONSEQUENCES:
I wake up around 9:30, felling foggy but much better for the sleep. The girls are gone, there's just a note with a number. I know I can do this presentation, at least I'm not going to miss it entirely. I jump outta bed and head into uni, print out the corrected version. I sit outside my class before it starts and try and memorize it. I even have time to get the sensee to correct the new version - I'd misread some of her corrections, writing ya where she'd written ka. So that was lucky.
At 11 I go in for the class, nervous as all hell. My pupils are still somewhat dilated FFS. Anyway, I think I culd have pulled it off, but as I stood up there, waiting for my turn, the person before me was just so damn GOOD, so much better than mine, that I felt this terrible sinking in my stomach, and i felt even more nervous.
Normally public speaking is easy for me. But when my turn came, I had the worst attack of nerves in possibly my entire life. My hands were shaking, my legs felt like they would buckle. I stammered and stuttered over every second word. When I was finished I felt like crying, but reasoned that at least I'd done it, and would get SOME marks.
So yeah, i thought, what i'd done that night was incredibly stupid, but boy was it fun. I wasn't upset or regretful - I saw the consequences of my actions and was willing to accept them.
I msged the number they'd left me to say thanks for the night, but the person msgs back to say i must have the wrong number. Strange. But then later that day when I went home and checked what was left of my stash after the big night - I couldn't find anything. Oh fuck. What a fool I feel. How badly I feel I was taken advantage of. At first I cant believe it - who could do that to a person that had done nothing but look out for them, give them free drugs, talk with on a meaningful level, spend a night with. I couldn't believe it, but I had to accept it - too much just added up - them being gone when I woke, the number being wrong, and of course, it all being gone.
THE FINAL CHAPTER:
I guess I'm more hurt than angry. Hopefully I can learn from this. Better yet I can find them and they can explain to me why they did it. Not that that's very likely. Although I DO have an email address of one of them, thanks to the Bluelight signup (is there anything BL can't do?!) I've emailed her a non-confrontational email asking if they know where i might have left my pills. I don't expect a reply. Oh well, they were only drugs - not important at all. It just sucks feeling so dumb, so naive, so used.
