i understand what you all say. but i am not yet done with the drugs. i know that they are 'bad' but its started and it wont stop.
There are some interesting concerns around this. The likelihood of developing an addiction increases significantly when a person begins using drugs early.
People who have never had an addiction do not know what a misery it ends up being. People who have never been addicted seem to think that people become so enamored with a pleasurable feeling that they can't stop doing this pleasurable act.
This couldn't be farther from the truth.
In addiction almost all of the pleasure effects of the drugs are gone. There is an illusion they still remain as people are required to take them to experience a state that is acceptable. SO in other words people end up taking the drugs in order to feel 85% as good as they would 95% of the time had they never used and we fail miserably at even achieving this.
The unconscious part of the brain controls motion and mood. This is how it manipulates the conscious brain to do its bidding. Its bidding in an addicted individual is to drive the use of the drugs. So it sends all it manipulations at an addict. It sends shame, guilt, depression, anxiety, hopelessness, fear, anger, resentment, jealousy, etc etc etc.
It also sends fantastical "memories" of drug use. These never happened really, but it sends memories of amazing experiences.
So imagine yourself stressed to a human breaking point, thinking your the biggest pile of shit on the planet, utterly hopeless, and pissed as you can get. Then imagine a little voice in your head saying get high. Every reason you give it not to use, it just chews on and spits out as a justification to use. As it whispers it send daydream fantasies of amazing things that never happened to try and convince you to use.
It makes you misserable and then taunts you with images of heaven. It even fucks with you in your dreams. Using dreams are experienced by addicts.. LOL at the name as no one ever gets to use.. The manipulation will let us get all the way up to using and then something crazy goes wrong to prevent it.
Like your about to drink in the dream and the bottom of the cup falls out. Or you're about to do a line of coke and the plate falls off the counter. Or your about to shoot up and the cops break down the door and arrest you and make fun of you.
But you're never going to touch a needle right? Wrong.. you would be amazed at how quick that idea changes. Not many people say hey im going to choose to be a IV drug user. Its just the natural progression.
I had an amazing childhood.. I'm very bright.. I have lived a privileged lifestyle.. im educated.. All these things have really nothing to do with addiction in the end. Sure a hard life or terrible experience can drive people to look to drugs to find relief, but in the end it just comes down manipulating the mesolimbic reward pathway.
If this is done enough or even in a strong enough way one time then addiction happens.
The drive to eat is hunger. The drive to drink is thirst. The addictive drive to use a drug as drug addiction.
We can choose never to eat, but we can't choose never to be hungry. We can choose never to drink, but we can't choose never to be thirsty.
We can choose to use drugs, but we can not choose never to become addicted. If we become addicted we can choose not to use the drugs, but we can't choose never to jones or be driven to use them.
The Brain and Addiction
Addiction Guide
At your age I would seriously consider putting off any drug use for a later time. To say addiction is rough is the undersell of the century.
If I were you knowing what I know I would consider shelving the drugs for a few more years.
Since you do not plan on doing this then I would really completely avoid three right off the bat.
Alcohol, methamphetamine, and opiates.
These drugs suck and totally ruin many many people.
I would really be very leary of the coke esp since you already OD?
I would avoid any and all "research chemicals" like the plague.
If your going to use drugs then please acquire a test kit so you know what you are taking. So much crap and dangerouse bunk shiot out there and yeah one dose can and will kill.. we see it all the time in the drugs in the media forum here on BL. Just because your friend tells you its all good, yeah does not mean it is.
Like I stated before I would put off using, but if you're going to choose to use then I would make yourself as aware as possible of harm reduction and try and avoid all the harm you can.
Hopefully you don't think i'm being harsh. I just wanted to share some hard fought knowledge i earned and learned the hard way
Whatever you do be smart, make sure your informed, and choose to be safe.
