Hi all,
I'll just start out by saying I've been an occasional user of one thing or another for about 12 years. I never really had a dealer or a constant supply of much, except a doctor who would write me whatever I wanted before he was shut down. After that, I basically didn't have a choice but to not use because I didn't have anything to use. Within the past two years, my significant other began doing the stronger stuff (or strongest) and using it in the strongest way. He hid it from me for a while and then eventually he couldn't anymore. I was frantic and upset, I was a flipping mess. So I do what any logical person would do (note my sarcasm about being logical) and I insist that he do the same to me because honestly I always hated not going through the same things he was going through, in my eyes he was my soul mate and we were supposed to go through everything together. Sorry if that sounds insane...he thinks it does. Anyway, so he gives it to me. I was fine, until the next time he did it. Then I wanted to do it again, even though I didn't feel the need to. Things go on like this for a while, then he says we are quitting. I quit, don't think anything of it, he keeps using, hiding it, and this is how things have been for a few months, except for when he is out of money and needs it. THEN...he wants to let me have some also, but ONLY when I buy my own and when I pay for HIS as well, and he gets to take a lovely chunk of mine too. Unfair much? It isn't cheap...and I can't afford to buy his and mine...he refuses to let me actually meet the guy he buys from, although i know who he is and what he drives and even his phone number! I feel like its a form of control...like, I can only get high if HE wants to let me and if HE is benefiting from letting me. I really really want to call his dealer and ask if he would mind selling to just me and not mentioning it to my SO, but I'm scared that I'd be taking a huge risk in doing so. From what I know, dealers are usually very hush hush...Plus he would be turning down more money if he told me no and ratted me out to my SO. He knows I'm not a security risk because he's delt in front of me. He has seen money come out of my wallet and being handed over, into his hand.
Anyone have any thoughts? Should I try giving him a call and asking if he would sell to me? Its been bugging me. I can't keep spending $$60 dollars on product that I only get 1/4th or less of.
I'll just start out by saying I've been an occasional user of one thing or another for about 12 years. I never really had a dealer or a constant supply of much, except a doctor who would write me whatever I wanted before he was shut down. After that, I basically didn't have a choice but to not use because I didn't have anything to use. Within the past two years, my significant other began doing the stronger stuff (or strongest) and using it in the strongest way. He hid it from me for a while and then eventually he couldn't anymore. I was frantic and upset, I was a flipping mess. So I do what any logical person would do (note my sarcasm about being logical) and I insist that he do the same to me because honestly I always hated not going through the same things he was going through, in my eyes he was my soul mate and we were supposed to go through everything together. Sorry if that sounds insane...he thinks it does. Anyway, so he gives it to me. I was fine, until the next time he did it. Then I wanted to do it again, even though I didn't feel the need to. Things go on like this for a while, then he says we are quitting. I quit, don't think anything of it, he keeps using, hiding it, and this is how things have been for a few months, except for when he is out of money and needs it. THEN...he wants to let me have some also, but ONLY when I buy my own and when I pay for HIS as well, and he gets to take a lovely chunk of mine too. Unfair much? It isn't cheap...and I can't afford to buy his and mine...he refuses to let me actually meet the guy he buys from, although i know who he is and what he drives and even his phone number! I feel like its a form of control...like, I can only get high if HE wants to let me and if HE is benefiting from letting me. I really really want to call his dealer and ask if he would mind selling to just me and not mentioning it to my SO, but I'm scared that I'd be taking a huge risk in doing so. From what I know, dealers are usually very hush hush...Plus he would be turning down more money if he told me no and ratted me out to my SO. He knows I'm not a security risk because he's delt in front of me. He has seen money come out of my wallet and being handed over, into his hand.
Anyone have any thoughts? Should I try giving him a call and asking if he would sell to me? Its been bugging me. I can't keep spending $$60 dollars on product that I only get 1/4th or less of.
