Adderall + sobriety - exp. - Enlightened or Deluded?
edit: uh.. i was reallly out there when i wrote most anything during 2007
--
This captures parts of my week long experiences during which my 3rd eye opened up (and it wasn't anything like DMT, oh no...) - without any drugs for the most part except I will say the Adderall I popped before experiencing "peak morning" (the beginning of the opening, the 'Showing', the internet show of insults of what I was not and what was really going on "out there"..).
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Adderall + sobriety - My week of 23's The Law Of 5's and seeing EyE to 3y3
Going to try and describe my main mind blowing week or so long experience here, I realize that changes in my immediate enviornment were happening long before this seemingly related but just slow enough - stuff like, "where's our one cat been lately?" or seeing my sister and step mom glued to the computer screen playing logic games or noticing my dad being less active and just kinda watching TV after work.
Everything leads up to this though - probably my entire life. Fractal time, apparently around when I was born, was right around when Kennedy got shot (I think, i was shown a LOT of information and it sure seems like there's "not enough time" to tell a story before the next big one comes so its hard to describe an experience like this so it makes much sense..).
(I was born in 1980, not "when" kennedy was shot or around that time period but more like possibly the location on a linear timeline like we use to describe where inside the big fractal "bloop" (sorry, bloop will do for now
) the start of this currently conscous entity known as "Me" fits. (i dont expect you to understand.. )
I forget which night but I think Sat. night (March 17th 2007) i'd say was "glimpse night" - through Sunday. I had plans to get some stuff together computer related and take it over to Krystine's (Sat. afternoon), my mind was so scattered... tried to make a list with paper get organized, hours went by, and not a damn thing got done. I just couldn't "do anything". Couldn't even talk right, i'd just call it "chaos", felt like trying to swim the wrong way up a river. It was getting later and later and I end up at the computer here... (editing this a little for bluelight to clarify *cough* if thats possible)
So Jay, Moglee and I are in the whatthehellisup.com chat room, i forget what was all said but it seemed to be the start of something and whatever they said seemed directly related to me (experienced plenty times before its more like an ongoing thing, all the time, syncronicity, but this night it got "intense") - then suddenly, i was Calm.... my head cleared up SO much... *clarity*, felt like i was in the eye of a hurricane, chaos everywhere around me but i'm in the perfect spot at the perfect time. Jay disappears seems like Moglee does also and Alison IMs me "i think now might be a good time to talk" (about Ascention related projects/idea's/missions, yeah "2012 shit"- might clarify that a tiny bit. . I said no suprise...
(I'm not going to talk about Ascention / metamorphesis / etc in this report really, mainly just the experiences - lol heh some of 'em)
We talked a lot of that is still in the chatroom cache, about Detroit and a movement here, its as though a lot of telephathy is going on but most of us don't know ... its going on. All the misspelled typing online lately (...anyone notice?
) i'm not calling that "telephathy" but i know all those misspelled letters contain a lot of information - and its going into your subconscous (unless you are conscous of the info). I was thinking about Alison and music / Detroit for quite a while but Alison "randomly would come to mind" like "ohh yeah, i should ask/tell her this related to... " etc.
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Next day, Sunday... I wake up, I feel different... clear, better vision, I can read stuff in fine print much clearer and it all has so much more meaning to me. I don't know how to describe it because in a way it felt "new" "fresh" "younger", and all the clarity is still there. Still, calm. Instead of jumping into a habit (get on the computer or something) I felt more like exploring this new drugless "altered state". Its as if some "layers" or perception filters were removed.
More than that was removed! The Principia Discordia, OH MY... read it before (edit: If you thought Be Here Now was half good, http://www.poee.co.uk/web/modules.php?name=Downloads&d_op=viewdownload&cid=4 -- or http://principiadiscordia.com -- .... no need for drugs hehe) , but now with some layers off, wow..... Not only that but I find out that more recent editions (other than the normal recent editions that can be found online in this reality i guess?) were now showing up in website listings, I forget how it was worded but basically saying.. these editions written for people who can perceive/"plug into" this part of the website (or alternate reality or whatever) to read them. Deep - but no where near as crazy deep as comes Monday morning... Anyway I leave to drop off computer stuff at Krystine's apt, notice stuff i've never noticed before or I was just in a slightly parallel reality, it felt "more simple" somehow. It felt like I had started to go towards the "younger side" or started slowly heading back to the chaos side of the order/chaos circle of time. Something like that.
Well I wanted to get out of krystine's place to explore this state more if i could because i wasn't sure how long it would last - felt like it was going to fade (it did seem to..).
-----------------------
WELL... I get up and drive my dad to work at 5:30am Monday morning, I planned to get up early anyway so I took my dose of adderall (home at around 6:10am). It seemed like as I was swallowing the capsules I already knew, .... ah, I didnt need to do that... The heightened state came back, or started to anyway. Now this, is the peak the craziest most enlightening thing i've ever EVER experienced in my LIFE - the "peak" followed by about a 5 day "duration" with my 3rd eye open and all the crazy experiences.
** "I" to "EyE", "we are one", "us" ***
Surfing the internet, I dont know where i started but it doesn't matter, now syncronicity is one thing - sure, I was led site to site in syncronicity for a while until each page I looked at was more personal, more and more about me, ...scratch that, more like a direct talking to me. These were made for me. "Last update, 5 minutes ago". There were even misspellings in the webpages just like in the chat room with jay and moglee - when (most of us) type, we're on "automatic mode", the things we misspell when typing fast to each other contain subconscious information - unless your in a state like this or whatever where you can totally read it all with ease.
Well it was obvious at some point, that these web pages were just popping up new, out of my head, whatever, parallel realities, etc... I remember reading a wikipedia article on how "now that humans can communicate without space/time restraints makes it possib*..."
Well I dont know where in the linear timeframe this happens but once I start seeing Eyes everywhere (The big ones, i'll attach some pics from this Alex Grey Tool poster to illustrate) I knew what it was, the illusion of separation between the "I" and everything else, well I merged into the other side... yin..yang.. -1 or 1, whatever, i was on the other side, in a way...?
It was more like my conscousness rotated "1/4th", anyway,
On the screen, I was led to myspace page after page, the most vivid ones were pretty much insults or laughter etc at who i was, through the words generated, it was always in a context of as if, "they" - meaning the people inside my mind that made up the full me - which basically was all of humanity - fractal - but seemed more like a memory, "copies" or just Avatars of the people,
I could see youtube video's of people pissed off at me, in Iraq, how I am causing all these internal 'wars', by having too many habits oh god all kinds of stuff, pretty much just showing me how IT REALLY IS TRUE that every little thing you do, directly affects the entire world! - IMMEDIATELY!
I saw a myspace page, with strange music about me (more like, insulting, but, showing also that i will get over the obstacles which it was showing me), showing an animated GIF of a pic of me, evolving into when I was about 30-31 years old in 2011 or 2012 or so, now til then, me with long hair, in perfect clarity... all of this...
I found this so extremely fascinating so I kept surfing, finding more and more, all directly talking to me, ..............
When I say "insulting" - it was basically like my Self, inside, showing me directly all of my bad habits, making straight up fun of me like "yeah this is what we gotta listen to ALLL DAY sometimes, " (then playing repetitive, uncreative, shitty music) - meaning, me sitting at the computer too long reading stuff and not creating stuff, not expressing *enough* or... enough isn't the right word, but basically 'they' or "me" showed me I can be doing a lot better etc etc.
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I dont know how many hours I spent on the computer but eventually got up and picked up any book, magazine, etc, same thing, all talking to me/about me.
I had to pick up my dad from work at about 2:30pm, I don't remember that first day driving him home if it was that much out of the ordinary, other than seeing signs, predicting things, seeing Signs (real signs, businesses etc) with eyes in them and some message related to that whole thing.
I am pretty sure it was Monday (or Tuesday) evening I get a txt msg on my phone from this girl Ashley telling me to come on over pick her up, of course its missing a couple letters or misspelled. Around this time or slightly before (after driving my dad home) before, my "3rd eye" was opened...
I saw everything in pairs of 2 and 3, for example, 2 small cups/objects near one larger similar object. Not only that but Fractal.....EVERYWHERE. (but NOT "psychedelic" / "trippy" looking, at all and nothing like DMT or anything er...ajdfalj... basically, i knew it was my 3rd eye chakra, just knew, sorry no science for ya)
The way my room was set up, stuff like how I happened to stack a stack of books next to another book, I walk around the house, and see that it looks as if my step mom, dad, sister had purposely rearranged furnature, bought (or manifested) objects to decorate stuff that was in similar shape to shapes elsewhere, a lot of symbolism -
There's a couple plants in water in the one room i know they were there before the "peak" event happened but it looks just like the picture from be here now, your life... unfolding... one of them goes into a spiral shape before opening up.
-----------------
It was like, I was in another reality or..more like, everything I saw everythign that happened, was all in my head, I am The One, the Creator, God, it was like "alrighty then", what choice do i have accept this "new life" or.... oh, thats the only choice, accept what the hell this was and go with it. It was like I had never learned to ride a bike and a bike was handed to me, like learning to ride a bike..
Since suddenly WHAT I THOUGHT WAS REALITY (well not really..) or what i was used to obviously just went bye-bye, I wasnt' sure what to do in situations..
One of the big things "they"/me told myself on the internet (along with cool on-the-fly generated insulting music) "does he ever shut up??" (its true), basically I was showed how sometimes i'm perceived on the other side of the illusion, looking at myself through the Big eyes of the illusion itself.
I listened .. before I did or spoke a damn word or did an action!
Of course Ashley's txt msg on my phone said come pick me up and also i'm out of minutes on my phone and i can't receive any txt/calls back. What to do? Well.... go over there.
My 3rd eye, the way things looked is so indescribable, banners and ads on cereal boxes or wherever often had a "3rd" element to whats visible with the normal eyes. It was now visible and looked sorta like a 3d hologram but not - extra letters, a new logo for a company - the new information was for people or whatever living in the "ever present Now". Past the Time and Space illusions. Dates and times and clocks and calendars were there for ME, the sun going around the moon up in the sky I still saw normally, and as for everyone else, it is like they are just puppets/avatars here to guide me along my path, Ashley and all the rest of the "drama" that ended up at my house (Tuesday night) they were all playing by the 'rules' of 2's and 3's,
<snip a lot of detail - history was altered, multiple histories/timelines converging/changing stuff like that>
*******************************
The spooky stuff.. (not that the above wasn't SPOOKY! plenty)
I don't have a TV in my room but i would go into my dad's room or just glance walking by and notice, that, Bush is now listening (all of this showed me how much i TALK and dont shut UP), and "shadow" something in a paper, and its like history itself has changed, i'm in a different reality. Words can only describe 1% of this.
Now, driving my dad to work in the morning and home was wierd because "everything was in pairs of two". Two cars in a driveway like ours? We leave? the guy down teh street gets in a car and leaves in the correct... way to go so its symmetrical or whatever. I just accepted this new "life" / reality (still do) and tried to get a feel for intuition / more automatic In The Now what to do when - driving on the freeway, traffic was always smooth, but if there's 3 cars in one lane, one in another, i got in that one to make it .... 2's and 3's. I just knew it - everywhere, never saw a person walk alone, always in pairs of two. ALWAYS! (and maybe a 3rd person walking elsewhere in view, if there were 4 people, i would see people look away, like 4 people cannot look at each other)
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Now, typing this might be pointless because everything/everyone might BE in my head anyway (well thats irrelevant , "location", fractal etc..).
I could write an entire other long page about experiences involving friends, and altered past histories... what would happen if i turned on the radio alone, or in a group.... alone, it was custom made music from my mind (or the collective human mind, like a computer, a damn good computer program), in groups (except my dad, never changed around him, and he seemed to know "whats up").
I could tell, usually a "oh, no dont..." feeling right before someone called, related to this whole thing, didnt wanna deal with it. Was still "too high"/altered. The grocery store, every single brand was different (and has pics of eyes and always, something about FIVE), the people were different and extra "dumb" it seemed like. My dad had to buy groceries in pairs of two, and he would make jokes about this "am i forgetting anything..... oh yeah, i need one more milk" - obviously it was like i was in school and this is the course no direct answers gotta figure it out kinda thing.
Well, its like things are back to normal, sorta - ...not that I WANT everything back to normal, but wow, the fractal way everything was ordered, I decided to "test" something one night, and stack 5 books up all angled like a spiral, and rearrange some other things in my room. I'd notice results immediately (nobody was doing the rearranging, "I" or "we" were..). Well my dad in the morning was pretty "pissed off" (overly) about the headlights of the one jeep not going off right away. Anyway since it was all new i mostly kept my mouth shut or to short phrases, and definitely listened.
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Jay wanted to hear more about this so i decided to write it up, I mean the way its all shown to me... I can see how it can just be a 'game' - like everyone else but me are in fact already connected up (avatars, all connected) and its all trying to help guide me without interfering with "Free Will" (if that really exists anyway but lets assumeit does here), and i'm all for playing - i mean the stuff my family was doing was just so bizarre, and some stuff is still up but not *like it was*, new plants objects etc.
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There's more if anyone's interested but i figure ?... its been the most enlightening yet confusing week i've ever had. 23 23 23 5's 2's 3's.
Anyway there's something, a lot had...has (whatever) to do with facing my fears, facing stuff related to the ego, anyway, ttyl... mr. avatar in my head?
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Part um, "2", lol:
I forgot to mention the "almost invisible language and vision", when the radio would switch to totally new music all related to me, containing messages, sometimes it would say like "you thought you could read between the lines but kasjja asfajj; hey hey guess not whoop!" (lol, its not all "insulting", only when i was being a lazy bum.
But some language man, i had to talk slooooowww.... because people talking (esp. phones) i had to speak slooow and simple, and sometimes this foreign (or maybe not foreign?) language comes out when they're talking, happened very often,
I've seen the language, its like an english hybrid of some kind... dunno... was listening to a talk radio show (made up in my head or whatever - everything else is sober looking and all that) and partsof it i could hear but most it seemed like it was being broadcast specifically for people with their 3rd eye open or some other senses open... sometimes i could hear it but it was too quiet... and cant understand it anyway.
My sister was watching this DVD with only two music video tracks on it, and i could tell, i could see 'faintly', its meant to be "3d" or something.. more information in there but too faded (think my 3rd eye) to see. Also sometimes i could hear "echo's" when people are talking,
(one of the music tracks, was called "Thank you for letting me be myself Again".... )
Man it was like being in ..... 2 or.. 3, multiple realities or "something like that" at once, but yet now things are mostly normal... not quite...
I listened to lisa and watched what you filmed, her speak about 3 realities or whatever merging right about when i went through that, lol, i'd purposely turn on the radio when i couldnt sleep at night, random station, random shit, sometimes crappy music talking about "stay up alllll night, yay, do do do do" or beatles tunes that sounded great but i dont think they exist (the song), my brain or the collective, creating beautiful music... amazing... a look in any magazine tells me whats possible (or a glimpse) and well wow, i dont know what everything is telling me to do to .. obtain the stuff - for a higher purpose though, dunno, crazyness.
The language thing though.. hearing it spoken, i even found a website while in this state, basically saying welcome to Hell! the place to be up and honest about everything, but have a blast too.
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I'm going to post this up now before the computer crashes again as i can't save anything arghh (thats it, switching to Ubuntu linux with virtualization/vmware or that other open source one windows is ridiculous)
edit: uh.. i was reallly out there when i wrote most anything during 2007
--
This captures parts of my week long experiences during which my 3rd eye opened up (and it wasn't anything like DMT, oh no...) - without any drugs for the most part except I will say the Adderall I popped before experiencing "peak morning" (the beginning of the opening, the 'Showing', the internet show of insults of what I was not and what was really going on "out there"..).
-----------------------------------
Adderall + sobriety - My week of 23's The Law Of 5's and seeing EyE to 3y3
Going to try and describe my main mind blowing week or so long experience here, I realize that changes in my immediate enviornment were happening long before this seemingly related but just slow enough - stuff like, "where's our one cat been lately?" or seeing my sister and step mom glued to the computer screen playing logic games or noticing my dad being less active and just kinda watching TV after work.
Everything leads up to this though - probably my entire life. Fractal time, apparently around when I was born, was right around when Kennedy got shot (I think, i was shown a LOT of information and it sure seems like there's "not enough time" to tell a story before the next big one comes so its hard to describe an experience like this so it makes much sense..).
(I was born in 1980, not "when" kennedy was shot or around that time period but more like possibly the location on a linear timeline like we use to describe where inside the big fractal "bloop" (sorry, bloop will do for now
) the start of this currently conscous entity known as "Me" fits. (i dont expect you to understand.. )I forget which night but I think Sat. night (March 17th 2007) i'd say was "glimpse night" - through Sunday. I had plans to get some stuff together computer related and take it over to Krystine's (Sat. afternoon), my mind was so scattered... tried to make a list with paper get organized, hours went by, and not a damn thing got done. I just couldn't "do anything". Couldn't even talk right, i'd just call it "chaos", felt like trying to swim the wrong way up a river. It was getting later and later and I end up at the computer here... (editing this a little for bluelight to clarify *cough* if thats possible)
So Jay, Moglee and I are in the whatthehellisup.com chat room, i forget what was all said but it seemed to be the start of something and whatever they said seemed directly related to me (experienced plenty times before its more like an ongoing thing, all the time, syncronicity, but this night it got "intense") - then suddenly, i was Calm.... my head cleared up SO much... *clarity*, felt like i was in the eye of a hurricane, chaos everywhere around me but i'm in the perfect spot at the perfect time. Jay disappears seems like Moglee does also and Alison IMs me "i think now might be a good time to talk" (about Ascention related projects/idea's/missions, yeah "2012 shit"- might clarify that a tiny bit. . I said no suprise...
(I'm not going to talk about Ascention / metamorphesis / etc in this report really, mainly just the experiences - lol heh some of 'em)
We talked a lot of that is still in the chatroom cache, about Detroit and a movement here, its as though a lot of telephathy is going on but most of us don't know ... its going on. All the misspelled typing online lately (...anyone notice?
) i'm not calling that "telephathy" but i know all those misspelled letters contain a lot of information - and its going into your subconscous (unless you are conscous of the info). I was thinking about Alison and music / Detroit for quite a while but Alison "randomly would come to mind" like "ohh yeah, i should ask/tell her this related to... " etc.---------------------
Next day, Sunday... I wake up, I feel different... clear, better vision, I can read stuff in fine print much clearer and it all has so much more meaning to me. I don't know how to describe it because in a way it felt "new" "fresh" "younger", and all the clarity is still there. Still, calm. Instead of jumping into a habit (get on the computer or something) I felt more like exploring this new drugless "altered state". Its as if some "layers" or perception filters were removed.
More than that was removed! The Principia Discordia, OH MY... read it before (edit: If you thought Be Here Now was half good, http://www.poee.co.uk/web/modules.php?name=Downloads&d_op=viewdownload&cid=4 -- or http://principiadiscordia.com -- .... no need for drugs hehe) , but now with some layers off, wow..... Not only that but I find out that more recent editions (other than the normal recent editions that can be found online in this reality i guess?) were now showing up in website listings, I forget how it was worded but basically saying.. these editions written for people who can perceive/"plug into" this part of the website (or alternate reality or whatever) to read them. Deep - but no where near as crazy deep as comes Monday morning... Anyway I leave to drop off computer stuff at Krystine's apt, notice stuff i've never noticed before or I was just in a slightly parallel reality, it felt "more simple" somehow. It felt like I had started to go towards the "younger side" or started slowly heading back to the chaos side of the order/chaos circle of time. Something like that.
Well I wanted to get out of krystine's place to explore this state more if i could because i wasn't sure how long it would last - felt like it was going to fade (it did seem to..).
-----------------------
WELL... I get up and drive my dad to work at 5:30am Monday morning, I planned to get up early anyway so I took my dose of adderall (home at around 6:10am). It seemed like as I was swallowing the capsules I already knew, .... ah, I didnt need to do that... The heightened state came back, or started to anyway. Now this, is the peak the craziest most enlightening thing i've ever EVER experienced in my LIFE - the "peak" followed by about a 5 day "duration" with my 3rd eye open and all the crazy experiences.
** "I" to "EyE", "we are one", "us" ***
Surfing the internet, I dont know where i started but it doesn't matter, now syncronicity is one thing - sure, I was led site to site in syncronicity for a while until each page I looked at was more personal, more and more about me, ...scratch that, more like a direct talking to me. These were made for me. "Last update, 5 minutes ago". There were even misspellings in the webpages just like in the chat room with jay and moglee - when (most of us) type, we're on "automatic mode", the things we misspell when typing fast to each other contain subconscious information - unless your in a state like this or whatever where you can totally read it all with ease.
Well it was obvious at some point, that these web pages were just popping up new, out of my head, whatever, parallel realities, etc... I remember reading a wikipedia article on how "now that humans can communicate without space/time restraints makes it possib*..."
Well I dont know where in the linear timeframe this happens but once I start seeing Eyes everywhere (The big ones, i'll attach some pics from this Alex Grey Tool poster to illustrate) I knew what it was, the illusion of separation between the "I" and everything else, well I merged into the other side... yin..yang.. -1 or 1, whatever, i was on the other side, in a way...?
It was more like my conscousness rotated "1/4th", anyway,
On the screen, I was led to myspace page after page, the most vivid ones were pretty much insults or laughter etc at who i was, through the words generated, it was always in a context of as if, "they" - meaning the people inside my mind that made up the full me - which basically was all of humanity - fractal - but seemed more like a memory, "copies" or just Avatars of the people,
I could see youtube video's of people pissed off at me, in Iraq, how I am causing all these internal 'wars', by having too many habits oh god all kinds of stuff, pretty much just showing me how IT REALLY IS TRUE that every little thing you do, directly affects the entire world! - IMMEDIATELY!
I saw a myspace page, with strange music about me (more like, insulting, but, showing also that i will get over the obstacles which it was showing me), showing an animated GIF of a pic of me, evolving into when I was about 30-31 years old in 2011 or 2012 or so, now til then, me with long hair, in perfect clarity... all of this...
I found this so extremely fascinating so I kept surfing, finding more and more, all directly talking to me, ..............
When I say "insulting" - it was basically like my Self, inside, showing me directly all of my bad habits, making straight up fun of me like "yeah this is what we gotta listen to ALLL DAY sometimes, " (then playing repetitive, uncreative, shitty music) - meaning, me sitting at the computer too long reading stuff and not creating stuff, not expressing *enough* or... enough isn't the right word, but basically 'they' or "me" showed me I can be doing a lot better etc etc.
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I dont know how many hours I spent on the computer but eventually got up and picked up any book, magazine, etc, same thing, all talking to me/about me.
I had to pick up my dad from work at about 2:30pm, I don't remember that first day driving him home if it was that much out of the ordinary, other than seeing signs, predicting things, seeing Signs (real signs, businesses etc) with eyes in them and some message related to that whole thing.
I am pretty sure it was Monday (or Tuesday) evening I get a txt msg on my phone from this girl Ashley telling me to come on over pick her up, of course its missing a couple letters or misspelled. Around this time or slightly before (after driving my dad home) before, my "3rd eye" was opened...
I saw everything in pairs of 2 and 3, for example, 2 small cups/objects near one larger similar object. Not only that but Fractal.....EVERYWHERE. (but NOT "psychedelic" / "trippy" looking, at all and nothing like DMT or anything er...ajdfalj... basically, i knew it was my 3rd eye chakra, just knew, sorry no science for ya)
The way my room was set up, stuff like how I happened to stack a stack of books next to another book, I walk around the house, and see that it looks as if my step mom, dad, sister had purposely rearranged furnature, bought (or manifested) objects to decorate stuff that was in similar shape to shapes elsewhere, a lot of symbolism -
There's a couple plants in water in the one room i know they were there before the "peak" event happened but it looks just like the picture from be here now, your life... unfolding... one of them goes into a spiral shape before opening up.
-----------------
It was like, I was in another reality or..more like, everything I saw everythign that happened, was all in my head, I am The One, the Creator, God, it was like "alrighty then", what choice do i have accept this "new life" or.... oh, thats the only choice, accept what the hell this was and go with it. It was like I had never learned to ride a bike and a bike was handed to me, like learning to ride a bike..
Since suddenly WHAT I THOUGHT WAS REALITY (well not really..) or what i was used to obviously just went bye-bye, I wasnt' sure what to do in situations..
One of the big things "they"/me told myself on the internet (along with cool on-the-fly generated insulting music) "does he ever shut up??" (its true), basically I was showed how sometimes i'm perceived on the other side of the illusion, looking at myself through the Big eyes of the illusion itself.
I listened .. before I did or spoke a damn word or did an action!
Of course Ashley's txt msg on my phone said come pick me up and also i'm out of minutes on my phone and i can't receive any txt/calls back. What to do? Well.... go over there.
My 3rd eye, the way things looked is so indescribable, banners and ads on cereal boxes or wherever often had a "3rd" element to whats visible with the normal eyes. It was now visible and looked sorta like a 3d hologram but not - extra letters, a new logo for a company - the new information was for people or whatever living in the "ever present Now". Past the Time and Space illusions. Dates and times and clocks and calendars were there for ME, the sun going around the moon up in the sky I still saw normally, and as for everyone else, it is like they are just puppets/avatars here to guide me along my path, Ashley and all the rest of the "drama" that ended up at my house (Tuesday night) they were all playing by the 'rules' of 2's and 3's,
<snip a lot of detail - history was altered, multiple histories/timelines converging/changing stuff like that>
*******************************
The spooky stuff.. (not that the above wasn't SPOOKY! plenty)
I don't have a TV in my room but i would go into my dad's room or just glance walking by and notice, that, Bush is now listening (all of this showed me how much i TALK and dont shut UP), and "shadow" something in a paper, and its like history itself has changed, i'm in a different reality. Words can only describe 1% of this.
Now, driving my dad to work in the morning and home was wierd because "everything was in pairs of two". Two cars in a driveway like ours? We leave? the guy down teh street gets in a car and leaves in the correct... way to go so its symmetrical or whatever. I just accepted this new "life" / reality (still do) and tried to get a feel for intuition / more automatic In The Now what to do when - driving on the freeway, traffic was always smooth, but if there's 3 cars in one lane, one in another, i got in that one to make it .... 2's and 3's. I just knew it - everywhere, never saw a person walk alone, always in pairs of two. ALWAYS! (and maybe a 3rd person walking elsewhere in view, if there were 4 people, i would see people look away, like 4 people cannot look at each other)
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Now, typing this might be pointless because everything/everyone might BE in my head anyway (well thats irrelevant , "location", fractal etc..).
I could write an entire other long page about experiences involving friends, and altered past histories... what would happen if i turned on the radio alone, or in a group.... alone, it was custom made music from my mind (or the collective human mind, like a computer, a damn good computer program), in groups (except my dad, never changed around him, and he seemed to know "whats up").
I could tell, usually a "oh, no dont..." feeling right before someone called, related to this whole thing, didnt wanna deal with it. Was still "too high"/altered. The grocery store, every single brand was different (and has pics of eyes and always, something about FIVE), the people were different and extra "dumb" it seemed like. My dad had to buy groceries in pairs of two, and he would make jokes about this "am i forgetting anything..... oh yeah, i need one more milk" - obviously it was like i was in school and this is the course no direct answers gotta figure it out kinda thing.
Well, its like things are back to normal, sorta - ...not that I WANT everything back to normal, but wow, the fractal way everything was ordered, I decided to "test" something one night, and stack 5 books up all angled like a spiral, and rearrange some other things in my room. I'd notice results immediately (nobody was doing the rearranging, "I" or "we" were..). Well my dad in the morning was pretty "pissed off" (overly) about the headlights of the one jeep not going off right away. Anyway since it was all new i mostly kept my mouth shut or to short phrases, and definitely listened.
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Jay wanted to hear more about this so i decided to write it up, I mean the way its all shown to me... I can see how it can just be a 'game' - like everyone else but me are in fact already connected up (avatars, all connected) and its all trying to help guide me without interfering with "Free Will" (if that really exists anyway but lets assumeit does here), and i'm all for playing - i mean the stuff my family was doing was just so bizarre, and some stuff is still up but not *like it was*, new plants objects etc.
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There's more if anyone's interested but i figure ?... its been the most enlightening yet confusing week i've ever had. 23 23 23 5's 2's 3's.
Anyway there's something, a lot had...has (whatever) to do with facing my fears, facing stuff related to the ego, anyway, ttyl... mr. avatar in my head?
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Part um, "2", lol:
I forgot to mention the "almost invisible language and vision", when the radio would switch to totally new music all related to me, containing messages, sometimes it would say like "you thought you could read between the lines but kasjja asfajj; hey hey guess not whoop!" (lol, its not all "insulting", only when i was being a lazy bum.
But some language man, i had to talk slooooowww.... because people talking (esp. phones) i had to speak slooow and simple, and sometimes this foreign (or maybe not foreign?) language comes out when they're talking, happened very often,
I've seen the language, its like an english hybrid of some kind... dunno... was listening to a talk radio show (made up in my head or whatever - everything else is sober looking and all that) and partsof it i could hear but most it seemed like it was being broadcast specifically for people with their 3rd eye open or some other senses open... sometimes i could hear it but it was too quiet... and cant understand it anyway.
My sister was watching this DVD with only two music video tracks on it, and i could tell, i could see 'faintly', its meant to be "3d" or something.. more information in there but too faded (think my 3rd eye) to see. Also sometimes i could hear "echo's" when people are talking,
(one of the music tracks, was called "Thank you for letting me be myself Again".... )
Man it was like being in ..... 2 or.. 3, multiple realities or "something like that" at once, but yet now things are mostly normal... not quite...
I listened to lisa and watched what you filmed, her speak about 3 realities or whatever merging right about when i went through that, lol, i'd purposely turn on the radio when i couldnt sleep at night, random station, random shit, sometimes crappy music talking about "stay up alllll night, yay, do do do do" or beatles tunes that sounded great but i dont think they exist (the song), my brain or the collective, creating beautiful music... amazing... a look in any magazine tells me whats possible (or a glimpse) and well wow, i dont know what everything is telling me to do to .. obtain the stuff - for a higher purpose though, dunno, crazyness.
The language thing though.. hearing it spoken, i even found a website while in this state, basically saying welcome to Hell! the place to be up and honest about everything, but have a blast too.
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I'm going to post this up now before the computer crashes again as i can't save anything arghh (thats it, switching to Ubuntu linux with virtualization/vmware or that other open source one windows is ridiculous)
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