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Acidic Assonace

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Bluelight Crew
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Mar 11, 2005
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This golden giddiness
Everly euphoric
I wish this for ever
However sophmoric
Reverberating riffs
Sung solely through spines
This fork's finely tuned
Sans all twisted tines
Permeating pain
Piercingly present
Plays poshly through me
Pain not meant for peasants
For this twitching divine
Like a donned cape of light
Is my lysergic, acidic
diethylametic night!
 
New said:
This golden giddiness
Everly euphoric
I wish this for ever
However sophmoric
Reverberating riffs
Sung solely through spines
This fork's finely tuned
Sans all twisted tines
Permeating pain
Piercingly present
Plays poshly through me
Pain not meant for peasants
For this twitching divine
Like a donned cape of light
Is my lysergic, acidic
diethylametic night!
Click to expand...


Beautiful. I won't even dare to describe it any other way. Who is this by? You, perhaps?


Edit- I was looking in the wrong thread. Hahaha. I thought you posted this in "Favorite Poem"... I haven't been sleeping much lately. I still think it's awesome and, in fact, you should be flattered because I thought you were going to say it was Eliot or Spender ;).
 
Last edited:
^Yes, I wrote it after my previous failure using assonant rhythm - on acid.

And thank you.
 
Last edited:
Edit- I was looking in the wrong thread. Hahaha. I thought you posted this in "Favorite Poem"... I haven't been sleeping much lately. I still think it's awesome and, in fact, you should be flattered because I thought you were going to say it was Eliot or Spender ;).
 
Yeah, that kinda makes sense. Thank you.:)

Now, I'm opening up this poem for criticism. You guys seem to like it. How can it be better?
 
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