Acid litmus test

[the light flux]

Took acid for the first time and I had a fairly neutral experience. I started to come up hard with all the cognitive distortions and the suspension of the mundane but I found that I never truly broke on through. In retrospect I think set and setting was essential in this instance. My time spent coming up alone was like degrees of euphoria mounting by step (still a little high aha) but the moment a girl we were with started expressing concern I just dived back down into my boots From there the high was me trying to shake off cramping and general irritability.
Can one person have that profound an effect on a trip? There were feelings of confusion and guilt. For a start I have an attractive girl sat with me on my bed with noone else around - that doesnt happen to me all that much aha. Our faces were almost touching several times - it was the essence of anticipation with real promise. I could have put my arms round her and just vibed but I have deep seated emotional stupid in my marrow -the indecision renders me spineless. Next I sense people taking the role of concerned adults. That just made me feel like a child tripping among adults. I went from feelings verging on the romantic to feeling that this girl just viewed me like a child tripping amongst older and wiser folks. From there my trip sucked with a vengeance

I felt that there was potential there. A renoir painting I looked at when stoned really started to pulsate with energy potentials. I just never felt truly thrown into psycahdelic chaos.

 

[Solipsis]

Hello and welcome to bluelight!

It might have been anxiety manifesting itself, I am not sure what kind of 'concerns were expressed' but if concerns are hanging in the air that can bring down the atmosphere and mood. Not sure about the guilt exactly, but with LSD you can have a lot of thoughts going through your mind and you can bring yourself into strange ideation. Apparently you had thought patterns that made you feel guilty about something, if you don't know why the confusion seems to be the source of it.
Also it sounds like you had a number of insecurities about yourself facing probably because this girl made you much more self-aware especially with the LSD on top of everything.

Maybe not everything is yet logically explained like that, but it doesn't sound anywhere near impossible. I am not sure what answer you are looking for but LSD just brings out our deepest joys and fear... also tripping can bring confusion which can make social situations very difficult and leave you overreacting to each other's expectations. It doesn't sound like you knew this girl very well yet like a friend... tripping can make you very sensitive and with relative strangers give you an exposed feeling, which is a source for the type of experience you describe.

I am not following everything you say though, some expressions like 'diving back into boots' I am not familiar with.

What does this have to do with litmus tests?? Please explain so that perhaps the title can be changed.

lol @ acid test, litmus, and having a (pH) 'neutral' experience.

 

[System7]

Can YOU pass the litmus test??

 

[the light flux]

Ahhh I guess im just wondering whether the incident with the gyal could have prevented me really tripping. I didnt feel comfortable at all. The initial rush was pure hedonism actually. I was listening to flying lotus (cosmogramma) and I imagined that the music was a living breathing writhing creature. I found myself imagingin that flying lotus himself was just a pawn in the music's designs. He himself had no awareness of the scale and profundity of the music - he was just a channel.
Then came the social interaction and I just retreated back into my shell (boots)

 

[Solipsis]

Although I understand you are still in the psychological aftermath of the experience, it doesn't seem worthwhile to me to worry and mull over reasons for what happened during the trip past a certain point. For reasons I explained, it just doesn't sound like a good set & setting to me so why don't you make sure those are in order next time and see if you experience similar thoughts and feelings like before. I'm confident that it will be very different.

So yes it's possible insecurities about the situation with the girl prevented you from letting yourself go, it makes a lot of sense. But nobody here can answer for you how it would have been different otherwise or how much certain factors contributed exactly to what happened.

lmao, system7