Abusive Mother Demands Rent

ford442

Bluelighter
Joined
Aug 18, 2006
Messages
736
Location
northern california
Hey guys,
I am 34 and my elderly mother has moved back into my old house. Since then I have realized that she is a heroin addict. I have been forced out on the streets 24 hours for the past 12 months. Now she demands that I put in $200 per month out of my disability money that I am left with having been psychologically damaged by her and her having shut down the family business with no warning.

I have made attempts to fix my money situation, but now I have had a series of heart attacks and been sexually assaulted by an aging prostitute. so that I can barely get up in the morning. She ripped down my recording equipment in my studio. Tore the acoustic treatment off of the walls and pulled up the carpet. She also turned away the carpenters I had hired to make this a place to live (single paned windows with gaps through the winter.) She even threatened to take my gear to the dump if I didn't jump up and carry it up a flight of stairs on a broken foot, toes and knees. I couldn't water the weed garden so it failed this year.

Before I put in about $50,000 and 10,000 hours of labor for her over the past years and now there is no food. Only smack fueled anger, arguments and threats if I don't cough up more of my disability money. It is really tough to live on disability alone with no proof of having been employed. So, for the past 12 months I have not put in my $2400 and now I she is threatening to throw me out in the street for good or to have the doctors and courts declare me irresponsible and hand over my money to her if I don't supply $200 every month. There is no rent. I pay the $100 internet bill and maintain all of the computers and tv's that I bought for her. I have not eaten food here since 2011. I have to eat gas station Chevron Egg McMuffins and $4 cups of coffee and live at the bus stop even on the coldest of midnights.

My mom fits the exact description of an 'emotionally abusive mother.' It rarely leaves bruises, but I here I am a schizophrenic diagnosed, unemployed, single virgin at 34. Now I have lost my only friend due to the horror that has been created where I used to happy a happy home.
My question is what to do about the money that they demand. I have maybe $25 a day to live and they demand $6.66. Meanwhile my friends are freezing, starving, going to jail and even dying while I am broke and in-incapacitated with misery and threats until I have already had to sell all of my rare, irreplaceable analog synthesizers and other equipment. Today they say that $50 will stop them from harassing me for today, but that the $200 has to be there every month from now until I die of depression and these heart attacks.

What does this sound like to you guys? Should I give over the money? I won't eat here. It is too painful. She can't get by with a whole house and fridge and stove and everything? I have to pay for a cookie when I want to go to the bathroom and eat with homeless junkies running totally out of money each month. I have visited and called the cops, city hall, social services a bunch of times. They say that some of the things that they do are illegal and not just spiteful. But, that the only easy legal solution is for me to move out. I can try eventually, but it is tough. I probably would have to move hundreds of miles to afford an apartment on disability alone. Having been raped and withdrawing from benzodiazapines while also suffering a massive heart attack has left me questioning whether I can ever hold a job again. Every day is a blurry, sad, painful argument and struggle over piss-ant amounts of money.

I am worried what they will do if I don't come up with the money and hand it over. Right now, I am in debt to the bank,
Help!

Advice please?

- Noah
 
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It seems like you both need help. She needs help fighting over her addiction and the only way is to send her to a rehab. You need to move out hun I know this is going to sound selfish but you are having health issues and if you don't take care of yourself your health will suffer.

Would it be possible to stay at a relative at the time being?
 
Noah, who owns the home, is it in your name or your mother's? You said you owe money to the bank so I'm assuming the $200 each month is for something relating to mortgage or taxes. Sorry it wasn't clear what exactly this payment is for, just "they" are demanding it. I would hate to see you lose your home. You said also somebody sexually assaulted you, did you report this to the police?

You shouldn't have to live homeless because you and your mother can't get along. If she is that bad on drugs, get Adult Protective Services involved so she can get help. Being that you are on disability, you probably qualify for food stamps so you might want to check into that. Certainly assisted housing benefit comes to mind.

You really need to see a caseworker or social worker if you want to live independently. I'm not familiar with how that works, start with social services. You need to take steps to gain control of your life. Otherwise, your mother can obtain power of attorney by declaring you incompetent and if she's threatened this already evidently she plans on following through.
 
Right.
Getting out of here has been high on my list for years. I have even been chatting with Navy recruitment.
Disability actually precludes me getting food stamps it turns out. Right now I am seeing if I can get on unemployment instead of disability which would allow me food stamps I think as well as paying a bit more.
The house is in her and her sisters name. I have lived here for 30 years. She didn't even pay any of the $20,000 mortgage. :(
APS sent a social services woman who she told that everything was a-ok while sitting there with an insane look behind single paned windows with broken furniture. Meanwhile we are at negative money. Then the scolded me for bringing government people into the house.
If I can get that unemployment benefit going instead of having only disability money things would be more acceptable. My case is not the wheelchair+food+disability+housing or the disability+job to return to later. I have it for my diagnosed schizophrenia, but I also have a nervous system issue in my neck and now PTSD from witnessing a shocking event.
Thanks for the attention to my weird situation. Would you believe that I think they knew Charles Manson in the 60's?
 
Whatever you do, do not give her a cent. Leave to anywhere, like public housing or something.
 
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