@SaosinEngaged, why don't you have access to a micron filter bro? I really wish you'd take my post to heart....
throw the needle away. It is NOT worth it. Have I EVER lied to you before? Do I have any reason to? You know who I am and my experience with mainlining and narcotics and the answer is if what you have available to you is oxycodone, you can't go out with a bang. You will so much more likely lose what matters most to you. I wish I could go way back to the fork in the road that metaphorically represents your life right now, and I would do this, I recommend you follow this advice:
You will need three things.
1) Your blues
2) a hypodermic needle
3) a picture of you and your wife, or just a picture of your wife.
Now, tape the photo to the largest mirror you have. Sit in front of it, and look at her for five entire minutes. Just five minutes while you assess this situation the way you asked this community for advice, just spend FIVE minutes of your life looking at the picture of your soul mate. Think about all of the milestones of your relationship and of your experiences together, and when you close your eyes and still see her smile, hold onto that feeling of euphoria, and then open your eyes and take your pills out, and uncap your hypodermic needle.
Hold the needle like it was a pen, roll it between your fingers and just pretend you were about to do your out-with-a-bang shot. Take a long, hard, serious look at yourself, taking in and analyzing every detail of your own reflection, seeing the man and soul that she fell in love with. Could you handle having to live the rest of your life without her? Waking up and knowing she will not be beside you, wondering what kind of guy she is sleeping with today because of the choice your soon to make.
I sincerely believe that you will already know in your heart what to do now. And if you're like me, you're probably still thinking about how to go out with a bang AND keep your wife. You can't brother. Even if you had an opioid that feels 1000x better than IV oxycodone, wouldn't that just make it 1000x harder to stop using opioids??? Now that you've discovered a way to take them to levels you didn't and SHOULDN'T know even existed before?
But in case your still looking at the needle..... Recap it, and safely dispose of it in accordance with your local waste management's protocol for biohazardous sharps disposal because it is no longer sterile now that it's been opened from it's manufacturer packaging and especially since it's been uncapped.... and you've touched it.... Just safely discard it in a way that will not harm an innocent person at the recycling center or wherever...
And then let me know how you feel after doing this FIVE MINUTE test, and we can proceed from there. I just want you to be safe whatever you do and I would feel really bad if I didn't respond to this thread buddy so I wrote a long post, since I didn't answer your PM's in time, but I'm finally finding a reliable way of getting on (and STAYING on) the internet and in between servers being busy here, I typed out this post for you.
If you're looking to go out with a "bang" and are planning to IV something... oxy is a really pointless choice and not worth the risks of IV'ing pills. There is no rush from shooting oxy and the bioavailability is only slightly higher than oral.
Sums it up perfectly, I'm going to elaborate though.
Honestly, if you're looking to go out with a bang, not that I in any way endorse or condone doing so before you quit, you should just stop right now
because once you administer that oxycodone via IV, even if you did everything perfectly correct and medically right, but if you did what you know you need to do when IVing a pill and use a 0.2um pore size PVDF 25mm diameter micron filter, and even if everything with all new all sterile equipment, sterile prep process, and EVEN AFTER
textbook and I mean
perfect IV administration using a fresh 29, 30, or 31 gauge needle, even if you manage to immediately hit a vein after you iso-swabbed the IV-site (and since doing so should be easier for you since you haven't destroyed your veins yet)....
Bro, you will be
so. fucking. disappointed from what you were anticipating what you'd feel, even using a large (by your individual standards) dose of oxycodone, so you've just pressed the plunger down all the way and take out the needle and recap it for safe disposal but are waiting for it to hit you, and while you wait your applying pressure with sterile cotton/gauze as you clean the IV-site with at least some 99% isopropyl alcohol preferably mixed with standard USP grade (3%) hydrogen peroxide or using a Q-Tip dipped in iso/peroxide and applying that to the now, likely bleeding, hole, that you just made in your skin to reduce the risk of any pathogens from being able to use the broken skin as an easy way to get absorbed into your bloodstream bypassing all of your bodies last defense mechanisms like you did with the oxycodone....
I guess what I'm trying to say is that I have spent years with you here on BL, and I really appreciate and respect your contributions to our community, and from what I know about you as a human being, you already know the right thing to do here. I don't want to see you get trapped like what's happened on and off for so many of the rest of us and I couldn't bear to watch you spiral down, down, down, headed nowhere, fast.
You just have that curiosity that the vast majority of us opioid addicts have at some period or another during their addictions, the curiosity about shooting up.
Just recently, I was in your exact same position, many details different but ultimately the same situation, except that I had been good about not using needles for year after year, but then I made a stupid choice that I have to live with for the rest of my life.
I chose to "go out with a bang" and then dedicate my life to my soul mate.
She left me. And I have been going out with a bang every night since, because I feel like now, what's the fucking point, I blew it.
So even if it made me a hypocrite, the type of person I hate the most and respect the least in this life, I'd still become one just to be able to tell you that I would without a doubt still lose a lot of respect for you as a man, fellow HR activist, human being, and fellow BLer..... if you choose the needle over what someone, a real live living breathing person with feelings and can't bear to see you head down that road, someone who makes you really happy? I just can't believe you would ever do that, from what I know about who you are as a human being, I think you'll choose the love of your life over a fucking stupid shot of a pharmaceutical that will make you feel stupid as hell for not just taking it orally since the IV oxycodone lasts much shorter than any other ROA of oxycodone that I know of, I don't think you should snort it either. Just pop the pill if you must, you need to start retraining your reward pathways and this already will be very difficult and adding in needles only makes it ALL that much harder, to an extent you have no idea exists. Keep it that way brother. Please.
Those are not the values that I encourage around here. And going back to personal talk, that's not the kind of man I ever would want to hang out with, someone who gives into their drug addiction over what could be true love. I honestly want to say so bad that I know you'll make the right decision here, but I can't be sure until I see how you respond to my post.
This ONE time as you stated it won't be dangerous at all like 0.001 % chance of harm I'm saying this from experience I'm not only a dope addict but also a needle addict for the last 2 years I have shot up every sort of pill u can imagine hell when I was on suboxone films I shot those every single day all along with adderal pills ir and xr on a regular basises etc... I have seen not a single negitiv side effect from years of this so u will be fine trust me
Wow. OP, you're a smart guy and will likely know better than to fall for this BS, but I've got to address this for the sake of all of the people who will read this post for the rest of time....
"Snakevillon", Would you please back up your claim that this ONE time has a 0.001% chance of harm being caused.... Or... wait...? You can't back up that figure? Why? Maybe because you made it up?
you might not have noticed anything wrong with your body... YET, but man this post is the opposite of what we strive for here in OD. Nothing in your post justifies your actions (let alone
encouraging others?? That your
2 years of experience shooting pills recklessly gives you the right to tell people injecting improperly filtered pills isn't a big deal??? Reality check dude, you have no idea that your even going to escape without harm, or that trouble isn't already brewing in your circulatory system but possibly yet to cause a life-threatening health condition since you say you've IV'd a lot of pills and suboxone strips, you likely have so many insoluble inactive ingredients like talc and magnesium stearate, and other binders/filler/killer floating around your bloodstream until they end up somewhere problematic like in your extremities, and in other places where the solidified particles attempt to pass through very fine blood vessels, particularly in your lungs.... Come on man, are you serious?
Just because you haven't noticed anything doesn't mean you can come in here and tell the OP that what he's suggesting/proposing carries a harm rate of 0.001%....
Theres as much logic to your post as there is to the following statement:
"I was one of those 20> % of people who smoked a carton a day my entire life since I was 5 years old and I have never had any health problems, yay, this means I should go and tell everyone that smoking is safe and that all the studies and research and science
must obviously be universally wrong for everyone, global warming is a myth, and the surgeon general has a 0.001% IQ."
There's just no logic behind this style of thinking, it's just justifying/rationalizing what you've done, which is a personal problem, which is fine, it's probably one that many of us also have struggled with, but this is a
harm reduction focus forum, you can't come in here and tell people that because you haven't noticed any long-term problems after having, what, ... a couple years of experience, shooting up drugs in a careless way?
I'm not trying to say that your lying and we all know that we have no idea what the state of your circulatory system is in, this much is already clear, but by applying your personal experiences in which you
THINK you got away without harming yourself after repeatedly doing something proven to be very dangerous and detrimental to one's health, you no proof that you won't have consequences as a result of your actions just because it happens only one time.....
This is like telling an adult female she can't get pregnant her first time having sex, no matter what the chances are,
you don't know that this will happen universally.
You are endangering the lives of those who read your post and might think to themselves that as long as they're planning on just doing something once, and because someone wrote a post that makes others feel that they will also come out unscathed by applying the same nonsensical invincibility and telling them that
theytoo will be able to get away with defying the laws of science and nature? This is the opposite of harm reduction! We don't shoot first and ask how many rounds are in the chamber or is the gun loaded first, we carefully unload the gun and examine from many angles how many rounds are in the chamber and we don't know how many rounds are in the chamber here so like the OD guidelines says, in accordance with the whole strict harm reduction policy Other Drugs is all about, we don't speculate when we don't know the answer, just stick to the facts, and things that can be backed up with proper peer-reviewed literature / medical journals and studies.
We are about minimizing harm wherever possible, and especially when the IV route of administration is intended on being used, and one is bypassing every single self-defense mechanism the human body was designed with using modern medicinal technology/equipment, it's something that we take very seriously and you should too, everyone should. If you don't have access to a micron filter then
1) you probably havent even tried looking for them because they are easily bought online just a search away. and
2) you have no business even considering using anything less than a micron filter for IV pharmaceuticals.
3) Save your life, limbs, and liberty and don't play roulette assuming theres a 0.001% chance the firearm will discharge.
There could be six rounds loaded in the chamber. We don't know, and so we don't speculate, we discuss ways of trying to metaphorically reduce the risk as much as possible and unload the gun as much as we can and in this situation, it would mean using a micron filter, which the OP currently does not have, but they are easy to purchase online from many major retail websites and for those of us who are using hypodermic needles as delivery vessels for pharmaceutical narcotics, it is CRITICAL that you use micron filtration and DO. NOT. SUBSTITUTE. Compressed cotton just isn't good enough for pharmaceuticals, when there are so many inactive ingredients at play, most of which are not soluble normally in water or blood which is water-based.....
Seriously, it's a violation of forum guidelines to encourage the use of the IV ROA when the OP is on the fence about the issue, it's so much better to try and talk him/her out of injecting to begin with than just posting what you did and not leaving any HR advice for how he could reduce the harm associated with IV pharmaceuticals. If a poster does return to a thread and is determined to IV, then we can discuss how to lower the risks that are associated with what they are planning on doing accordingly.
You didn't even mention why we should trust you, so why should the OP and all the readers of this board trust your statement above?
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Unofficial warning, to everyone, and a reminder to review the existing guidelines about the ethics of recommending/condoning the use of the intravenous ROA, and when it's appropriate vs when it is not, and the morals on which this forum was founded and which we strive for it to continue to uphold today.
you all.
