August 5th, 2013 - A day which will live in stinky infamy, I went to drop off the kids at the pool. My kids are quite tougher, denser, and fatter than most, because daddy has chronic constipation.
Anyways, the expected happened, again. Yes, again, I flooded the toilet. And the plunger couldn't deal with this serious kind of shit.
So I picked up my trusty auger and went deep. I could feel it bustin' through several layers of unyielding turds. Boy was I happy that I could flush again.
After a job well done, I began to retract the auger, but noticed it's stuck on something hard. With my surgeon hands, I gently went back and forth in an attempt to dislodge and hopefully not have to deal with anymore of this caca, but no luck.
I eventually lost my patience, and applied MANLY force. As a result, the auger soon proceeded to swiftly exit the shit-hole, with some stubborn turds attached. The intense recoil then flung various pieces of feces in a circle pattern all across the bathroom walls.
Apart from the walls, mirrors and myself, items which received a baptism of doodoo included our toothbrushes, combs, mouthwash, shampoo, soap, towels, rinse cups, sink, dentures, and q-tips. But hey - at least my face was spared!
Among the comments made from amused family members was this gem: "You don't take shit from no one - except yourself!" Har har har.
Till next time, goodbye bitches.
Anyways, the expected happened, again. Yes, again, I flooded the toilet. And the plunger couldn't deal with this serious kind of shit.
So I picked up my trusty auger and went deep. I could feel it bustin' through several layers of unyielding turds. Boy was I happy that I could flush again.
After a job well done, I began to retract the auger, but noticed it's stuck on something hard. With my surgeon hands, I gently went back and forth in an attempt to dislodge and hopefully not have to deal with anymore of this caca, but no luck.
I eventually lost my patience, and applied MANLY force. As a result, the auger soon proceeded to swiftly exit the shit-hole, with some stubborn turds attached. The intense recoil then flung various pieces of feces in a circle pattern all across the bathroom walls.
Apart from the walls, mirrors and myself, items which received a baptism of doodoo included our toothbrushes, combs, mouthwash, shampoo, soap, towels, rinse cups, sink, dentures, and q-tips. But hey - at least my face was spared!
Among the comments made from amused family members was this gem: "You don't take shit from no one - except yourself!" Har har har.
Till next time, goodbye bitches.
