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a question to you regarding MDMA, a serious, mature inquiry for serious mature people

vettestyle: it seems as if MDMA caters to the classic drug addict, it is a very classical pyschological addiction, all waking time spent thinking, all money spent on it, etc, etc, I feel for you bro, I was definitely at one point in the situation where I would just drop because, well, that's what I did, all the time. Keep em coming brothers and sisters.
 
ONE- For me, yes, it is definitely worth it.
TWO- We all get high. Is it any more mature to go to church or to play pinochle. It's whatever floats your boat man.
 
this is a question i've been struggling with for a long time now & for the most part i've decided that it's not worth...probably b/c some of my friends are now in rehab. even so, i have to say i don't regret my experiences and it is a wonderful thing to be able to enjoy while it lasts...but i'm not sure i'd venture to say it's for everyone.
 
Originally posted by djremix:

as another said, i myself have never suffered hangovers, the most i would attribute to a lack of sleep. even after binging in ibiza for 5 nights in a row. i am a very light user aswell. nearly 50 pills now. started 1 year ago.

I would not call 50 pils in a year light use... Lack of sleep does make it worse, because sleep is when the seretonin is "recharging", so naturally, less you sleep, more u scatter.
Harsh and harmful chemicals pass through our bloodstream quite regularly- im not sure if recreational MDMA use would cause too much damage to blood vessels; however, this is not to say that someone who abused Ecstacy would not cause damage of some sort.
Does anyone have any speculation as to whether the neurotoxic effects of ecstacy use are permanent, or whether long-term abstinence from the drug would help with this...
This is the best thread in a long time...
Click to expand...
 
Just a few thoughts:
Why the arbitrary number 3 times? Even if we're looking at the drug as a learning experience, maybe what someone discovers the first time, it takes someone else until a year later to realize--but it still changes their life. You also should consider the person that rolls 15 times in 15 weeks v/s in 5 years..do you think their problems would be equal?
I was thinking of the concept of harm reduction today, and how we often wish in life, that we could be as children
And it occured to me that we so wish we could do childlike things in an adult manner. We want to see the world as precious, to play all day, to not consider each decision as having endless repercussions. Instead we substitute by doing adultlike things in a childlike manner. We recklessly have unprotected sex, do drugs to experience those emotions, drive cars too fast, etc...all things that we know better than to do, but obviously there is some reason. There must be, as so many of us do it.
Some have offered evolutionary reasons (read: The third chimpanzee by Jared Diamond)..some offer emotional, others behavioral. The fact is, that if we did these things for all the same reasons, we'd probably all agree on their usage and their end.
I applaud anyone that, having realized that they were no longer getting what they needed from whatever they were doing (drug and non-drug alike) examined their life and discontinued that thing. But just as your reasons for starting were not the same, the reasons for ending might not be applicable to anyone either.
:) nice post :)
[edit]..i do want to add that i don't think to label a person doing it more as immature...this comes close (in my thought) to talking of someone as "unsaved" if they don't follow your belief. it creates a pedestal, with you as one on top, who miraculously only saw this once you got there...just keep in mind how that comes across sweetie. in addition..i beg to differ that drug-free life is without it's own thrills and peaks, unless you're going to not have sex, or ride roller coasters, or know you won't become depressed or manic or whatever. my life without drugs is super manic most of the time...the wkends i allow myself to be free and relax are my drug wkends.[/edit]
[ 15 January 2002: Message edited by: fizzygirl ]
 
I've read in Trip magazine one guy wrote something like "..i don't see
why anybody would want to use Extasy more than 6 times a year or even in a lifetime.." and I find it makes sence.
 
Quite frankly, the reason I don't stop is because I enjoy myself doing it. I have done it about 45 times or so(I lost count unfortunately). Likely somewhere in the realm of 90-100 pills in those times doing it. I realize that this could be construed as excessive; however, I have noticed no brain damage, and, even if some exists, it hasn't bothered me yet. But seriously though, I have never really experienced this harsh comedown or crash I hear and see so much about...I must just be a medical and chemical anomoly or just a lucky bastard. I would imagine that if I did "crash" the day after every time I did it, my number of times would be quite significantly lower. However, until it bothers me that way I don't intend to quit it altogether, though I have cut down because, I am no fool, I am in college now and I can't keep this up forever, and I can't keep going at my old rate or I will develop a mental dependence on it like I once had with marijuana, so I have promised myself to discontinue use for a few months, till my birthday to be exact, and after that to limit it to, at most, once every 6 weeks or so...wish me luck in my cutting back, and I wish us all the best in life.
 
Good to see a whole bunch of posts and ideas - at least we now know that pillheads to have a bit of grey matter left - lol.. just kidding.
Great topic acid_raver!
DJREMIX... sad to hear that you think your life is boring - take care of yourself sweetie - because when you start taking drugs for pure excitement - you will always be looking for a new, ultimate high. Find something that does excite you - new job, hobby, love , field of study and make MDMA just an occasional funky experience - not the core of any/all excitement in your life.
Not preaching - my morning cuppa tea just inspired me!
 
hey all, thanks for your comments. i just need to clarify a couple of points that were misunderstood.
when i 50 pilss in one year werent much i was being relative to those you call pill-heads :) 3 to 5 pills a week every week.
Also yes my life is SOMEWHAT boring, but its not like its all under my control. so im just flowing with it, no problems just little annoyances.
All stems from where i live, kind of people around me and the activities that are available to me. where i live people do not have many options to do, and unfortuanatly what i discovered i really like doin i cant in this are. so that would essentially make life at the very least annoying.
but i lift my spirits back up on vacations at least. im not like depressed or anything. i have a steady good income job, great girlfriend, ok to amazing freinds, eat healthy and gym 5 days a week, so i am just complaining about my environment, NOT my life cool? :)
also i DONT piracetam before every roll, i did experiment and research this stuff and yes ofcourse i tried it out of curiousity. it does intensify the roll but i have found that its not needed after a month of using it alone :)
my "pill head" freinds however swear by it, how it brings back the rush etc. so thats why i mentioned it.
on a side note, i would REALLY love to know why a certain pill BLOWS me away EVERYTIME i try it, wether its just one after 5 weeks of nothing or wether its pill #5 after 3 nights of kickass partying. i wont name it but im sure everyone rememebers what i used to rave on.
other pills vary but none can touch it.
peace :)
 
50 pills in a year is a high amount, pill head or not, lol.
That certain pill may contain a substance that u have no tolerance from, it may be an extra-specially good pill, i dont know. but i think its a little off the topic.
 
^^^50 in a year is not really a high amount imo - there's 52 weekends in a year, and they're there to be partied on! i'd say that in 2000-2001 i averaged 5 pills per session, and went out at least every two weeks on average - so we can see that's 130 pills in twelve months... and i'm all good!
peace :)
 
fizzy: I agree the amount that each person should roll probably greatly differs. I threw 3 out of my ass, just because thats what I thought it would take for someone to really get to know MDMA, and personally in my opinion, once someone gets to know MDMA it's nearing time to abstain. There is simply only a limited amount you can learn from it, and much better and safer ways to have fun.
 
i have to say, this post has stimulated some interesting
thought on my part. :)
i haven't taken E in about 16 months now. the last time
was less than stellar for me; i railed about half a pill
over a night and felt next to nothing. i was never a
heavy user -- i've probably taken about 30 - 35 pills
since '97 when i started -- but it did affect the way
that i thought and felt.
i have a history of depression, and when i first tried
E, i was immediately taken by how good i felt during and
after the experience. perhaps that was part of my problem.
it's been mentioned already in this thread that if your
life is not going the way you want it to, drugs probably
won't help in the long term. they can lift you up, get you
going, but it's up to you to maintain that momentum and do
something. i speak from experience -- i've been taking
anti-depressants for nearly a year now. the drugs have
given me a stable mood, but i still have to change my own
behaviour patterns to get where i want to be.
having said that, i think that i'll definitely take E again
in the future. not for a while, but sometime. i value the
experience because i love the empathetic feeling you get. i
rarely feel the sense of 'connectedness' with other people
in my everday life. that's not so troublesome when you're in
room full of strangers, but when i can't relate to my
'friends' or relatives, i feel bothered. E reminds me how to
open up.
i see it as a means of drug therapy not unlike the
anti-depressants i'm taking now. it puts you in a place that
you can learn from. all you have to do is *learn* from it.
i'm not sure that i have yet.
understand?
 
interesting post acid_raver.
i agree with you that abuse of MDMA is a decision that compromises your mental and physical health.
also, i'd like to point out that abuse is a wide ranging state that applies to ALL drugs, ALL types of behavioural patterns and habits. the specifics of MDMA are left up to the user to decide if they think the temporary effects of the drug are worth the after effects.
also the lasting spiritual, mental and emotional bonds which are engaged with oneself and others when experiencing a peak can leave an indelible print on your psyche, i feel that these are as important as the actual experiences while on the drug.
from experience, i feel that MDMA has expanded my consciousness to an extent in that i have developed a deeper understanding of myself, my friends and have explored deeper currents which run within us and society. it's a state of perception experienced that i find hard to conjure with. i enjoy the drug immensely, in therefore in respect to my body, mind and spirit, limit use of it as to somewhat preserve the experince.
i do recognise from others that the magic will one day most likely disappear, until then, i chose to take pills to facilitate a state which i value. this does not mean i cannot enjoy life, or experience euphoria in other ways, it simply means that i like to heighten perception from time to time and to simply ENJOY myself in a different sphere of experience occasionally.
i'm sure many others would agree.
well posted everyone.
all thought is valid and of value, no matter how unacceptedit may be by others. our mind is the most important tool we have, and an oppportunity to expand it, without abusing it's abilities to harshly, is surely something one would wish to do? i think so anyway, at the moment it seems.
 
Originally posted by acid_raver:
I do, wholeheartedly believe that if every single person in the world used MDMA once, then we would have a lot less violence and crime.

I couldn't agree more with this sentence.
I LOVE this drug. MDMA changed absolutely my view of life in a whole better way. It helped me in many ways of my day-by-day life. Sure, using this drug can lead to some (or many) negative effects. But, since 2 years ago rolling with moderation I can say right now that I don't regret any second that I had on MDMA and I don't noticed any seriously negative effect, at least until today.
I will never forget MDMA.
It can seems ignorance or making me an ass-hole on your eyes or whatever but I love MDMA and I'm proud for had "discovered" this drug.
Click to expand...
 
The reason I roll is a simple few hours for altered and perhaps clearer perception. For me, it is a way to give myself a total release of emotion. I dance it out, talk it out, and I usually feel a little less pent up after rolling. I don't think it is something that is safe to abuse - I have had the depression that comes with abuse, and I quit for awhile. However, I believe that it is similar to alcohol (for me) and moderation is the key.
As far as "is it worth it?" I have this to say: When I breathe, I have no choice about what else enters my body besides oxygen. So, I choose to do this, because I know that life is short and precious, and you aren't going to live forever. I pay my bills, go to work, love my family, and enjoy my roll responsibly. It's something I do for me - it's worth it.
 
the other thing is MDMA is different things to different people. I dont really take it just to get high, hence ive almost allways rolled at a rave, either that or a club its more of a performance/expierience enhancer. To me its allways been music and dancing,with pils just adding to it, so if the magic of X wears off a little its not such a big thing to me, its not the be all and end all as far as im concerned.
 
MDMA is not always a happy drug. There are a few experiences with MDMA when I went into it with a great mind set and came out afraid to ever do it again. Sure it makes ya happy, but it isn't going to solve the world's problems or make everyone feel happy or love for eachother. Its just not possible.
Regular people do receive spikes in their serotonin levels when experiencing periods of excitement or pleasure. Just as MDMA users do, tho prolly not quite as noticible. And as you said I'm sure that with time, those peaks we receive while rolling would slowly taper off with consistent or heavy use(ie. hence why we start to build up a tolerance). After the tolerance is made its hard to make it go away. With each use you sink farther and farther away from the first two or so peaks you hit. Now on the other hand wouldn't you assume you couldn't quite hit those peaks of happiness/pleasure you used to achieve when sober? Ahh, haa...the depression many frequent or long-time users experience for the few hours after, or for some the days after rolling. Psychological addiction.
Personally I feel I've outgrown MDMA. I don't get the excitement or the buzz I used to when I think about it or do it. Yea I still get high off of it, but its lost its glamour to me. It used to be all new and interesting...but now I know how its going to feel. I'll prolly never "say" I'm quitting MDMA tho I know eventually I will eat that finaly pill and not be aware that it will be my last. But until that day, I'm going to moderate my use, and be aware of what I'm doing to my body and mind. Do I think MDMA use is wreckless or careless?? Only for the uninformed, ignorant drug user who doesn't give two shits about his or her own safety. Those are the immature ones!
 
I urge all of you to get your happiness from life and sanity. Find a higher power to take you to that place of complete happiness. I was using E and enjoying it every single time for about 3months 1nce a wk or 2wks, until one day rolling I had a horrible experience of hallucinating, panic attacks and just an extreme feeling of detachment to my surroundings. No sleep, couldn"t eat... Just sheer chaos and insanity. It (the bad trip) lasted for about 35 hrs. and two wks later, I'm still having a hard time sleeping and flashbacks of the whole experience. There is no 6hr experience worth the dicomforting, depressed feeling that it brings later...and to think, I was fine b4 taking E. I was happy, I was content in life. I'm not blaming any1 or anything but me.
I do believe that anything done in moderation is fine, but it seems to me that in order to get the extreme euphoric feeling out of E, you must increase its dosage each time.
Just a warning, you never know when that time is gonna come when you have that bad trip &I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Twitching, anxiety and extreme panic attacks, constant fear of a flashback and depression...is it really worth all this???
 
let me just say that this is an excellent post, i have enjoyed the sharing of intelligent thoughts! :) now i'll add my opinion...
firstly, i think it is important to consider that each person who takes drugs takes them for a uniquely different reason from all other drug-taking individuals simply because everyone in this world is different and unique, and everyone's unique life and experiences will lead them to do things for different reasons. for example, just because both person A and person B continually take MDMA to make themselves feel a sense of belonging, their reasons for needing to feel this way stem from uniquely different life experiences. and the sense of belonging person A feels is not comparable to the sense of belonging person B feels because their emotions are unique and extremely personal. it is impossible for me to describe how i feel to someone and have them completely understand becaue they are not me. therefor, i think it is impossible to generalize that MDMA intake should have a 3 time limit because i believe generalizing is really not possible or productive in reference to anything, drug intake or otherwise. as said in a previous post, what takes one person 2 rolls to learn might take another person 20. and to add to that, i would like to point out that even though the sense of satisfaction many people, including myself, feel after their first roll is otherworldly, immeasureable, and can never be repeated, the mindblowing effect is extremely different and personal to each person because everyone is an individual. i believe there can be no generalizing regarding MDMA intake or anything else for that matter because everyone is just so fucking unique. :) variety sure can make things difficult and confusing, but it is what makes this world so wonderful! don't the ubiquitous "they" always say that variety is the spice of life? :)
now to address the question of whether or not it is worth it to flood yourself with happiness, so to speak. i can only answer this from a personal viewpoint. for me, it is worth it if i can learn something from the experience and positively integrate it into my everyday life. maybe that is why i am a relatively light user. (i rolled for the first time last march and since have only rolled 7 other times.) i enjoy being fucked up, dont get me wrong, but if i learn nothing from an experience and gain nothing but a headache, then i feel i have unnessesarily wasted away a part of my brain. what it is i learn, i cannot put a finger on exactly (it is very personal and hard to put to words as im sure anyone who has "learned" anything from drugs knows), but i like to feel satisfied and cleansed, to put in the simplest terms. and i want to have a great time. i have to say i would NEVER on my LIFE take back my first roll because it was the most memorable, enjoyable, mindblowing experience i have ever had up until that point or since. (but im young, i hopefully still have more to experience!) the second time was also wonderful. rolls #3, 4, 5, 6, 7, and 8...each was fun and memorable in their own way. (except for one horrible roll which was a result of uncontrollable circumstances revolving around a friend that actually had nothing to do with me, but in my vulnerable emotional state, i ended up getting upset. for a while i was scared to roll after that, because i didnt understand why the pill had not made me happy and it seemed to me something had gone terribly wrong. lets just say im a little more informed these days.) but i have to say, though the past few times i have felt satisfied, i have not felt satisfied ENOUGH. i have high expectations for my trips. i like to be in a place i love with people i am totally and utterly comfortable with. at this time in my life, i feel that there needs to be a change before i roll again so that the experience can live up to my expectations. i have never experienced a post roll depression, only a bit of sleepiness, and in fact, i usually have a ridiculous afterglow for days on end after i roll, so it is not negative after-effects that are promting me to take a MDMA vacation, but my own expectations for a wonderful, enlightening time. i am not trying to recreate that first roll. i cant and i dont really want to. but i DO want to flood myself with happiness, be it unhealthy or not, because if i do it right, i know that it can have an overall good effect on me and my life. so far, my positives definitely outweigh my negatives, so of course i am going to continue to roll. i just am careful to do it at the right time and place so that it will definitely be a valuable experience to me and not just a fuck up.
sorry this is so long, but i hope my input is helpful. peace. :)
 
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