I took the plunge yesterday...I am now on methadone maintenance! I called last week inquiring about new patient intake appointments and was told to come in Monday morning at 5am. So come Monday morning I get up at 4am and begin getting ready to bike the 2/3 miles to the clinic closest to my apartment. I get there fairly early (4:45am) and sit down to drink my coffee and smoke. When the doors opened at 5am there was maybe 4-5 people ahead of me in line. I walk in, wait in line and when it's my turn to go up to the window I'm told that their new patient intakes were on Tuesday and Thursday and that I didn't have to come in until 7am... errrgg..I'm kinda upset by this, but since I smoked tar the previous night I wasn't sick or anything. I begrudgingly unlock my bike and start to ride back home, thoughts racing through my head.
Now, I've thought about MMT many times over the years, but always deciding against it due to the horribly loooooong w/d from it. I watched my boyfriend drop CT (he was taking anywhere between one 40mg wafer to three wafers and had been for years he told me) in 2006 and it was a living hell for both of us! I had never taken an opiate for recreational purposes before and I didn't know what methadone was at that point. It took him years....YEARS for his body and mind to come back to his original baseline, and to be honest, I'm not sure if they ever truly went back to normal. After experiencing that with him I tried to steer clear of methadone and obtaining a physical dependency, but that didn't work out after ten years of "chipping" But I digress...
Make it back home fairly early and decide to take some of my Kratom that I had decided to squirrel away for the day when I was ready to jump off methadone. To be honest, I loved Kratom! The whole reason I'm on MMT is because Kratom will be banned this Friday. I've been using Kratom for maintenance for three years and it held me just fine. Of course, whenever I could get my hands on pills (or, heroin these last few months) I would and I would thoroughly enjoy them! I'd always get some with the intentions of not taking high amounts, or saving some for the next day (or next week) but I could never do that. My mind would ALWAS be on opiates and without them I'd become a super birth
Now, I've thought about MMT many times over the years, but always deciding against it due to the horribly loooooong w/d from it. I watched my boyfriend drop CT (he was taking anywhere between one 40mg wafer to three wafers and had been for years he told me) in 2006 and it was a living hell for both of us! I had never taken an opiate for recreational purposes before and I didn't know what methadone was at that point. It took him years....YEARS for his body and mind to come back to his original baseline, and to be honest, I'm not sure if they ever truly went back to normal. After experiencing that with him I tried to steer clear of methadone and obtaining a physical dependency, but that didn't work out after ten years of "chipping" But I digress...
Make it back home fairly early and decide to take some of my Kratom that I had decided to squirrel away for the day when I was ready to jump off methadone. To be honest, I loved Kratom! The whole reason I'm on MMT is because Kratom will be banned this Friday. I've been using Kratom for maintenance for three years and it held me just fine. Of course, whenever I could get my hands on pills (or, heroin these last few months) I would and I would thoroughly enjoy them! I'd always get some with the intentions of not taking high amounts, or saving some for the next day (or next week) but I could never do that. My mind would ALWAS be on opiates and without them I'd become a super birth