soulfly
Bluelight Crew
i felt something snap inside of me today
something i read a week or so ago has been repeating over and over and over and over and over and over and over again in my brain like a broken record.
two short sentences have never hurt me like this
then, my mind decided to put those two sentences together with something else i read by somebody else
but they're not even on the same side of the country, or are they?
is this what it's like to be insane?
My stomach has been tied in knots all day, and i've been having trouble breathing...
What seemed to be an impossible scenario now reeks of possible reality.
Such an odd comment from someone i thought i knew so well...
they wouldn't do this to me, would they?
Is a piece of ass worth all that much trouble?
i wonder again if this is what it's like to be insane...
All i know is that something doesn't smell right...and i'm not anywhere even close to the situation, so i'm sure my feelings were never a concern
I'm sure they thought i would never find out
are these words of paranoid delusions? or are there some grounds for thinking these horrible thoughts?
i wish someone would just come clean with me...i feel i deserve at least that much
a friend would never do this to a friend, but then again... i've seen friends do a complete 180 when the opportunity to get laid comes around
two strange sentences echoing over and over and over again in my head
a reference to something i've never heard you make a reference about in the years that i've known you
which leads me to believe that this may be something new...
and if i'm right....*stop* well, i probably shouldn't share these types of thoughts here...
but god help me, and god help us all...
but i feel i have a right to know
to know who my friends are, and possibly who thrust into me the dagger sticking out of my back.
At the top of my lungs i scream out: "Is this what it's like to be insane?????????"
but no sound comes out of my mouth, it's like trying to yell while underwater and drowning
a moment before i let out my tortured call to the world, my voice was cut off by a sound...and immediately, it became the only sound audible, growing louder and louder by the second
i look up towards the sky, angry at who or whatever has slighted my desperate cry... and all i see is black
i look at my watch, it's only 5:00 in the evening... it shouldn't be night yet
then i notice the wings.... and the sound grows louder until my eardrums burst and blood pours out of the sides of my head
everything is black now...there's nothing left except the sound of millions of wings flapping....and birds screeching
they are poised to tear me to pieces, i know it....
to dine on my entrails while i am still alive
all in pursuit of their own pleasure...
i begin to cry. i have long since stopped fighting the birds...
i let them take me... to bring to an end this life that i have known for 26 years.
i roll on to my back and whisper "kill me" softly to them...not knowing whether or not i have even generated any sort of sound at all...
i wait for what seems like eternity for that moment of attack...here, on my back, in the middle of nowhere, while a murder of crows grows stronger and stronger every second above me
is this what it's like to be insane? or has the unimaginable become reality? have they really done this to me? and if it's true, i fucking hope it was woth it.... for you will find out soon enough the damage you have caused
something i read a week or so ago has been repeating over and over and over and over and over and over and over again in my brain like a broken record.
two short sentences have never hurt me like this
then, my mind decided to put those two sentences together with something else i read by somebody else
but they're not even on the same side of the country, or are they?
is this what it's like to be insane?
My stomach has been tied in knots all day, and i've been having trouble breathing...
What seemed to be an impossible scenario now reeks of possible reality.
Such an odd comment from someone i thought i knew so well...
they wouldn't do this to me, would they?
Is a piece of ass worth all that much trouble?
i wonder again if this is what it's like to be insane...
All i know is that something doesn't smell right...and i'm not anywhere even close to the situation, so i'm sure my feelings were never a concern
I'm sure they thought i would never find out
are these words of paranoid delusions? or are there some grounds for thinking these horrible thoughts?
i wish someone would just come clean with me...i feel i deserve at least that much
a friend would never do this to a friend, but then again... i've seen friends do a complete 180 when the opportunity to get laid comes around
two strange sentences echoing over and over and over again in my head
a reference to something i've never heard you make a reference about in the years that i've known you
which leads me to believe that this may be something new...
and if i'm right....*stop* well, i probably shouldn't share these types of thoughts here...
but god help me, and god help us all...
but i feel i have a right to know
to know who my friends are, and possibly who thrust into me the dagger sticking out of my back.
At the top of my lungs i scream out: "Is this what it's like to be insane?????????"
but no sound comes out of my mouth, it's like trying to yell while underwater and drowning
a moment before i let out my tortured call to the world, my voice was cut off by a sound...and immediately, it became the only sound audible, growing louder and louder by the second
i look up towards the sky, angry at who or whatever has slighted my desperate cry... and all i see is black
i look at my watch, it's only 5:00 in the evening... it shouldn't be night yet
then i notice the wings.... and the sound grows louder until my eardrums burst and blood pours out of the sides of my head
everything is black now...there's nothing left except the sound of millions of wings flapping....and birds screeching
they are poised to tear me to pieces, i know it....
to dine on my entrails while i am still alive
all in pursuit of their own pleasure...
i begin to cry. i have long since stopped fighting the birds...
i let them take me... to bring to an end this life that i have known for 26 years.
i roll on to my back and whisper "kill me" softly to them...not knowing whether or not i have even generated any sort of sound at all...
i wait for what seems like eternity for that moment of attack...here, on my back, in the middle of nowhere, while a murder of crows grows stronger and stronger every second above me
is this what it's like to be insane? or has the unimaginable become reality? have they really done this to me? and if it's true, i fucking hope it was woth it.... for you will find out soon enough the damage you have caused
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