Day one of sobriety. Technically, it's been over 24 hours now without a toke but margin of error and all that. Reading the article about cannabis damping motivation really hit hard for me because it was something I've been pondering a lot lately. Sometimes it feels like I'm not really getting anywhere and as much as I tried breaking through the rut without giving up the ol mary jane, I'd still end up using it as a crutch to deal with stress and would just wind up being more stressed out as a result. The whole thing snowballed into a vicious cycle and I want out.
I hope that by tonight I'll be over the physical withdrawal. Last night was a turbulent sleep, and by morning I had the uncomfortable sensation of my brain being dog tired and wanting sleep but my body being restless and needing to jump out of bed.
The sober life seems like such a distant memory for me. For the past decade, if I wasn't toking then I was drinking, and I've abused both of those enough plus short stints with the white n brown. Lately, since I've gotten deep into the herb addiction, I've alienated almost everyone close to me. Even though I've managed miraculously to keep it a secret from some, it still didn't mitigate the negative impact on my relations with people.
I really hope this time I can get ahead in life, I'm sinking under the pressure of my mounting responsibilities and can't afford to lose hours a day in medicated bliss. Sure would be nice, but I'm marking this date so I have something to look back on in case I do weather the storm and emerge an improved version of me.
I hope that by tonight I'll be over the physical withdrawal. Last night was a turbulent sleep, and by morning I had the uncomfortable sensation of my brain being dog tired and wanting sleep but my body being restless and needing to jump out of bed.
The sober life seems like such a distant memory for me. For the past decade, if I wasn't toking then I was drinking, and I've abused both of those enough plus short stints with the white n brown. Lately, since I've gotten deep into the herb addiction, I've alienated almost everyone close to me. Even though I've managed miraculously to keep it a secret from some, it still didn't mitigate the negative impact on my relations with people.
I really hope this time I can get ahead in life, I'm sinking under the pressure of my mounting responsibilities and can't afford to lose hours a day in medicated bliss. Sure would be nice, but I'm marking this date so I have something to look back on in case I do weather the storm and emerge an improved version of me.
