Fuck a duck I just freaken lost my cocksucking introduction GRRRRR! Short version: Copped a pleasant buzz from the pills, started goofing off writing a rediculous title "Cocksuckers Rule" in order to test out this font, then got into it and changed the title, and started REALLY writing. Some names have been changed to protect the guilty haha
A History of T. J -- Biological Background
During the spring of 1969 my kid sister so named Crystal Joyce Moon was born to Sharon Le Rose, a 17 year old unwed mother and Raymond Anthony Tarantino, a 28 year old out of work playboy in Scottsdale, Arizona. Tony, the name my birth father goes by told me in the summer of 1996 that he refused to marry Sharon because he had been living with a wealthy older woman & wasn’t about to trade a life on easy street to one of a responsible father/husband that actually had to support a family. He said my Mother Carla back in 1964 ,the year I was born had been the only woman to ever “dump” him, which broke his heart & therefore hardened his heart towards women/romance.
Of course, he also admitted too, that his own father Dominic Tarantino had raised & taught him that as a male, he did NOT have to work, & in fact, because of his exceptional good looks, bona fide male model material, wouldn’t & shouldn’t ever have to work. Tony’s parents Elizabeth & Dominic had catered to him his entire life. Dominic held an occasional part time job as a security guard, going to work when & if he felt like it only. Mama T, the name I had given her growing up, even though I never met her had the burden of not only raising the children, waiting on her husband hand & foot, but had the additional burden of supporting the family as well.
Mom had told me the same thing during the years I was growing up & I always somehow sensed she had been telling me the truth. She never bad mouthed my birth father, & I’ve always thought she was a hell of a woman for being able to hold her tongue about his shortcomings until I was an adult, and even then, only because I had asked for the truth. My intuition was affirmed one night when I had been 15 years old & staying with my grandparents, my Mother’s side. My Grandmother had been drunk & we always had deep conversations regarding all sorts of subjects, & I have to hand it to my Grandparents, God rest their souls, they too, never once bad mouthed Tony. My Grandfather said nothing, even though I found out years later that he hated Tony for what he had done, or I guess I should say had NOT done, which was to be a responsible father/husband.
The entire time my Grandfather was alive, he had only said one thing in reference to Tony, & only then because I had made a statement/question one day growing up saying, “Mom told me that you disapproved of her marrying Tony,” to which he simply stated, “Yes I did,” in a regimented tone of voice. The way he had finalized his statement told me loud & clear that he was not willing to discuss the subject any further. Looking back, I know the unspoken reason why not. My Grandfather didn’t have anything nice to say about Tony, hated him, but wanted to refrain from dogging my birth father. As an adult, I am amazed at the restraint both of my dear Grandparents demonstrated.
Grandma, on the other hand, was willing to elaborate & go into much more detailed discussions unlike my Grandfather, a trait that is pretty typical usually way more so in women than in men. I am grateful to both my Mother and Grandmother and hell women in general because usually it is through speaking and writing with other women I was able and am able now to gather more insight into men that are normally silent or shall I say, very direct & limited in their willingness to dispense information. I know it has to do with the chemical differences of how male and female brains work & are put together. My entire life up until the point I met Tony, as far as half the riddle of my genetic self/traits was a mystery.
I remember once seeing a movie many years ago on T.V. about Malcolm X. He so named himself, at least the “X”part, because he had no idea of either one or both of his biological parents, or -- perhaps it was his roots further back in his genealogy he was unsure of. The latter is probably true, but he so named himself Malcolm X because the answer to who he really was genetically,(due to the disgraceful American slave trade up until 1864) eluded him. I forget if it was his birth parents or further back in his lineage he was unaware of, but I so empathized with him because half of who I was had been, and probably always would be a mystery to me, or so I thought until I was 32 & after meeting Tony face to face. Some adopted friends I’ve known growing up could care less if they ever found out who their birth parents were while others were very or at least slightly curious to meet or at least know about their biological parents.
While I respect my peers not wanting to know more about their biological folks, I’ve never been able to understand how a person couldn’t be at least curious about who their parents were or where they came from, because even though their adoptive parents may be the only parents they would ever perhaps love & respect, the fact remains that genetics has a profound influence on who we are as individuals--regardless of whether or not we were raised by one or both of our birth parents. So, up until age 32, half of who I was, not so much spiritually, but genetically, had been a mystery to me. It felt like a loss somehow, or half a riddle, a riddle I would always remain unless and until I got to meet Tony or at least some relative like his sister Diane, my paternal Aunt who could fill in the blanks of this missing information.
My Grandmother, had told me as a teenager (or sometime) that Tony “was half exceptional and half nothing” or “half good and half nothing,” was the phrase she used. On the one hand Tony had been a lazy, undisciplined spoiled brat, a little spoiled boy in a man’s body, but on the other hand in spite of an aborted education, was highly intelligent, talented, and extremely handsome. I have seen pictures of Tony as a young man and Christ he was every bit as handsome as my Mother was drop dead gorgeous as a young woman. I am proud to have had beautiful parents because the artist in me, my love and appreciation for beauty in people, places, and things both physical and spiritual is stirred.
I am 46 now, or will be in 7 days & ever since the age of 32, have truly appreciated the fact that Mom was beautiful and Tony drop dead handsome. Mom approaching 67 years as of Oct 19, is in fact STILL a supreme beauty for her age, If not for being 60 lbs over weight, she would be a definite 10 for her age group. She has no wrinkles, flawless skin, and looks 17 years younger than she is, and as I said, if the extra weight was not there, she would probably look younger than me. Both my Mom and Tony had gifts and beauty, gifts my Mother made the best of and in fact became extremely successful both financially AND spiritually, while Tony for the most part did not. He too is or at least was quite handsome for his age. He was 64 the last time I saw him, but sadly, unlike my Mother, threw his gifts away for the most part.
He utilized his exceptional looks, as Dominic taught him, and made his living off women most of his life. He was successful somehow for about (I’m guessing) 2-3 years at robbing armored trucks and told me he had had literally thousands and thousands of dollars that came and went. He told me in 1996 he never had anything to show for it because he spent money every bit as fast as he made it. He had been successful also at eluding law enforcement for I’m not sure how long—for both multiple felonies of robbing armored trucks, as well as at least one, if not multiple counts of having had sexual intercourse with a minor or minors, of which my little half sis, sweet little Crys, had been born to, hence the beginning of Baby girl Le Rose born June 9, 1969, latter named Crystal Joyce or C.J. Moon, the name given to her by the parents that had adopted her back in 1969….(to be continued…should you, dear reader care to read more...? )---T.J. Tarantino Sept 27, 2010
The 1st pic below taken Dec of 64 with Mom, Tony, & I, which was only 1 of 2 pics I had seen of Tony until age 32. The 2nd pic was taken Dec of 65 right around the time Tony was literally and metaphorically no longer "in the picture" haha.
A History of T. J -- Biological Background
During the spring of 1969 my kid sister so named Crystal Joyce Moon was born to Sharon Le Rose, a 17 year old unwed mother and Raymond Anthony Tarantino, a 28 year old out of work playboy in Scottsdale, Arizona. Tony, the name my birth father goes by told me in the summer of 1996 that he refused to marry Sharon because he had been living with a wealthy older woman & wasn’t about to trade a life on easy street to one of a responsible father/husband that actually had to support a family. He said my Mother Carla back in 1964 ,the year I was born had been the only woman to ever “dump” him, which broke his heart & therefore hardened his heart towards women/romance.
Of course, he also admitted too, that his own father Dominic Tarantino had raised & taught him that as a male, he did NOT have to work, & in fact, because of his exceptional good looks, bona fide male model material, wouldn’t & shouldn’t ever have to work. Tony’s parents Elizabeth & Dominic had catered to him his entire life. Dominic held an occasional part time job as a security guard, going to work when & if he felt like it only. Mama T, the name I had given her growing up, even though I never met her had the burden of not only raising the children, waiting on her husband hand & foot, but had the additional burden of supporting the family as well.
Mom had told me the same thing during the years I was growing up & I always somehow sensed she had been telling me the truth. She never bad mouthed my birth father, & I’ve always thought she was a hell of a woman for being able to hold her tongue about his shortcomings until I was an adult, and even then, only because I had asked for the truth. My intuition was affirmed one night when I had been 15 years old & staying with my grandparents, my Mother’s side. My Grandmother had been drunk & we always had deep conversations regarding all sorts of subjects, & I have to hand it to my Grandparents, God rest their souls, they too, never once bad mouthed Tony. My Grandfather said nothing, even though I found out years later that he hated Tony for what he had done, or I guess I should say had NOT done, which was to be a responsible father/husband.
The entire time my Grandfather was alive, he had only said one thing in reference to Tony, & only then because I had made a statement/question one day growing up saying, “Mom told me that you disapproved of her marrying Tony,” to which he simply stated, “Yes I did,” in a regimented tone of voice. The way he had finalized his statement told me loud & clear that he was not willing to discuss the subject any further. Looking back, I know the unspoken reason why not. My Grandfather didn’t have anything nice to say about Tony, hated him, but wanted to refrain from dogging my birth father. As an adult, I am amazed at the restraint both of my dear Grandparents demonstrated.
Grandma, on the other hand, was willing to elaborate & go into much more detailed discussions unlike my Grandfather, a trait that is pretty typical usually way more so in women than in men. I am grateful to both my Mother and Grandmother and hell women in general because usually it is through speaking and writing with other women I was able and am able now to gather more insight into men that are normally silent or shall I say, very direct & limited in their willingness to dispense information. I know it has to do with the chemical differences of how male and female brains work & are put together. My entire life up until the point I met Tony, as far as half the riddle of my genetic self/traits was a mystery.
I remember once seeing a movie many years ago on T.V. about Malcolm X. He so named himself, at least the “X”part, because he had no idea of either one or both of his biological parents, or -- perhaps it was his roots further back in his genealogy he was unsure of. The latter is probably true, but he so named himself Malcolm X because the answer to who he really was genetically,(due to the disgraceful American slave trade up until 1864) eluded him. I forget if it was his birth parents or further back in his lineage he was unaware of, but I so empathized with him because half of who I was had been, and probably always would be a mystery to me, or so I thought until I was 32 & after meeting Tony face to face. Some adopted friends I’ve known growing up could care less if they ever found out who their birth parents were while others were very or at least slightly curious to meet or at least know about their biological parents.
While I respect my peers not wanting to know more about their biological folks, I’ve never been able to understand how a person couldn’t be at least curious about who their parents were or where they came from, because even though their adoptive parents may be the only parents they would ever perhaps love & respect, the fact remains that genetics has a profound influence on who we are as individuals--regardless of whether or not we were raised by one or both of our birth parents. So, up until age 32, half of who I was, not so much spiritually, but genetically, had been a mystery to me. It felt like a loss somehow, or half a riddle, a riddle I would always remain unless and until I got to meet Tony or at least some relative like his sister Diane, my paternal Aunt who could fill in the blanks of this missing information.
My Grandmother, had told me as a teenager (or sometime) that Tony “was half exceptional and half nothing” or “half good and half nothing,” was the phrase she used. On the one hand Tony had been a lazy, undisciplined spoiled brat, a little spoiled boy in a man’s body, but on the other hand in spite of an aborted education, was highly intelligent, talented, and extremely handsome. I have seen pictures of Tony as a young man and Christ he was every bit as handsome as my Mother was drop dead gorgeous as a young woman. I am proud to have had beautiful parents because the artist in me, my love and appreciation for beauty in people, places, and things both physical and spiritual is stirred.
I am 46 now, or will be in 7 days & ever since the age of 32, have truly appreciated the fact that Mom was beautiful and Tony drop dead handsome. Mom approaching 67 years as of Oct 19, is in fact STILL a supreme beauty for her age, If not for being 60 lbs over weight, she would be a definite 10 for her age group. She has no wrinkles, flawless skin, and looks 17 years younger than she is, and as I said, if the extra weight was not there, she would probably look younger than me. Both my Mom and Tony had gifts and beauty, gifts my Mother made the best of and in fact became extremely successful both financially AND spiritually, while Tony for the most part did not. He too is or at least was quite handsome for his age. He was 64 the last time I saw him, but sadly, unlike my Mother, threw his gifts away for the most part.
He utilized his exceptional looks, as Dominic taught him, and made his living off women most of his life. He was successful somehow for about (I’m guessing) 2-3 years at robbing armored trucks and told me he had had literally thousands and thousands of dollars that came and went. He told me in 1996 he never had anything to show for it because he spent money every bit as fast as he made it. He had been successful also at eluding law enforcement for I’m not sure how long—for both multiple felonies of robbing armored trucks, as well as at least one, if not multiple counts of having had sexual intercourse with a minor or minors, of which my little half sis, sweet little Crys, had been born to, hence the beginning of Baby girl Le Rose born June 9, 1969, latter named Crystal Joyce or C.J. Moon, the name given to her by the parents that had adopted her back in 1969….(to be continued…should you, dear reader care to read more...? )---T.J. Tarantino Sept 27, 2010
The 1st pic below taken Dec of 64 with Mom, Tony, & I, which was only 1 of 2 pics I had seen of Tony until age 32. The 2nd pic was taken Dec of 65 right around the time Tony was literally and metaphorically no longer "in the picture" haha.
