Angelight
Bluelighter
OK so its one night, and i am sitting there just thinkin and he calls. He needs to talk. Him and her are going through this breakup kinda not thing. So i am suprised...why is he asking me for advice.
So he asks me to get a cup of coffe, and there we are me and him sitting in a smoke filled room for three hours just talking...just talking. How my life is these days, how his life is, and how i really really really think he needs to save what he has with this girl. And how now i realize he really does have insecurity problems.
And i sat there and he stares, and i can't look at him in the eye, i don't think i ever will be able to again. I used to be able to stare so hard...and long...he was always scared i would see through him...i did.
So i sat there and he looked. He studied me, my hands, my expression, the way i tied my hair back, and i noticed it. I am filled with comfort and discomfort at once. We never talked about why those 2 years happened, we only speak of them and never of why. I don't push it because i know he is sorry...in his eyes he has said it a million times. Then i think of how i hurt for so long...maybe i am too forgiving.
So i walked into his house and it still smells exaclty the same, only now there is wood floors. I'm a little antsy, but it goes away. I hear his mom call my name from up the stairs...she says she misses my smile around there...and that makes me uncomfortable.
So i drop him off and he says thank you a gazillion times and we hug goodbye. He holds on an extra long time, and all i can think is i hope i helped...and i am relieved. I smile b/c i am free...so free...i love him no more.
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hmm just a thought...a thought on how good it feels to love other things
------------------
"Try my exctasy...
"
So he asks me to get a cup of coffe, and there we are me and him sitting in a smoke filled room for three hours just talking...just talking. How my life is these days, how his life is, and how i really really really think he needs to save what he has with this girl. And how now i realize he really does have insecurity problems.
And i sat there and he stares, and i can't look at him in the eye, i don't think i ever will be able to again. I used to be able to stare so hard...and long...he was always scared i would see through him...i did.
So i sat there and he looked. He studied me, my hands, my expression, the way i tied my hair back, and i noticed it. I am filled with comfort and discomfort at once. We never talked about why those 2 years happened, we only speak of them and never of why. I don't push it because i know he is sorry...in his eyes he has said it a million times. Then i think of how i hurt for so long...maybe i am too forgiving.
So i walked into his house and it still smells exaclty the same, only now there is wood floors. I'm a little antsy, but it goes away. I hear his mom call my name from up the stairs...she says she misses my smile around there...and that makes me uncomfortable.
So i drop him off and he says thank you a gazillion times and we hug goodbye. He holds on an extra long time, and all i can think is i hope i helped...and i am relieved. I smile b/c i am free...so free...i love him no more.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
hmm just a thought...a thought on how good it feels to love other things
------------------
"Try my exctasy...
"
