C Divinity
Bluelighter
These little things I tend to overlook have all brought me feelings of joy today. Its a strange thing to say, as at times I think i lost the ability to feel joy...but not this day. Nothing important was done, some might even call it a day wasted, but I enjoyed every minute. Feelings that I normally dismiss as juvenial have entertained me to no end today. A child-like giddyness seemed to take over me at times, making it hard to keep one single thought to myself.
There is still that piece inside me that wants to wipe this smile off my face, but these words I can't forget, bothering me all weekend, continue to echo in my head. I can control how I feel, and I have been able to all this time, its just that I lost that ability when I started drowning in a river of self pity. Today I think about the past and I still can't get rid of the smile. These events have shaped me into the woman I am today, strong, and independant. Yes I can say it, I am strong. The only thing thats carried this far is the strenght I possess inside me, the strenght that will ultimitly drive me to make my dream come true... my dream, thinking about it adds to these feelings of happiness. So there, i've done it. I've made it my first day without tears in a long while, with just a little bit of help, but mostly on my own. And now as I prepare to lay down and sleep, I have no fear of being alone with my thoughts, as the only thoughts in my mind right now continue to keep a smile on my face and a warm feeling throughout my body.
------------------
You gotta be a bad girl in this world to be heard...
There is still that piece inside me that wants to wipe this smile off my face, but these words I can't forget, bothering me all weekend, continue to echo in my head. I can control how I feel, and I have been able to all this time, its just that I lost that ability when I started drowning in a river of self pity. Today I think about the past and I still can't get rid of the smile. These events have shaped me into the woman I am today, strong, and independant. Yes I can say it, I am strong. The only thing thats carried this far is the strenght I possess inside me, the strenght that will ultimitly drive me to make my dream come true... my dream, thinking about it adds to these feelings of happiness. So there, i've done it. I've made it my first day without tears in a long while, with just a little bit of help, but mostly on my own. And now as I prepare to lay down and sleep, I have no fear of being alone with my thoughts, as the only thoughts in my mind right now continue to keep a smile on my face and a warm feeling throughout my body.
------------------
You gotta be a bad girl in this world to be heard...
much love
