Well today is my 40th birthday. In November, I celebrate my life in the years following my spinal cord injury. Today, I take stock of my whole life. Being a milestone, I want to see if my life in the pro/con argument can be considered an achievement. It may be too introspective but it is who I am. Also, there may be valid reasons for why they happened. I am not concerned about them right now.
Positives:
- I am on the Board of Directors of a large non-profit in my hometown where I make a significant contribution to the lives of 600 people with disabilities.
- I have developed a friendship with my father such that we can laugh at/with each other.
- I provide on-going peer support to newly injured spinal cord injured enabling their integration into their new life.
- I have achieved outcomes following my injury that surpass most other C6-7 quadriplegics.
- I live completely independent. Again, not many quads can say that.
- I have always had the support of my mother.
- I have the resolve to return to university.
- I have the strength to move from a small community to the largest city in Canada.
- I have the wisdom to maintain/improve my fitness.
- I have played wheelchair rugby on one of the best club teams in the country and am developing a pretty god one here in Toronto.
- I can talk to almost anybody about almost anything.
Negatives:
- I have had addictions for most of my life.
- I have lied and cheated people about those addiction such that it has cost me a lot of friends.
- I never developed a proper relationship with my father for the first 38 years of my life.
- I feel a gnawing that if not for getting help when I needed it, when I was a teenager, the sky would have been the limit.
- I have not developed friends that I can confide anything and everything to.
- I have been single all my life never understanding my true self.
So in sum, do I feel as if I am successful as I hit the big 4-0? Yes, I do. All my “bad” has been surrounded by a lot of good. I must remember that the list I have generated is filled with positives that far outweigh the negatives. I must also remember to look forward and not back. Looking backwards only instigates the negativity and the self-doubt.
Believe in and trust yourself.
"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me." Stuart Smalley
Positives:
- I am on the Board of Directors of a large non-profit in my hometown where I make a significant contribution to the lives of 600 people with disabilities.
- I have developed a friendship with my father such that we can laugh at/with each other.
- I provide on-going peer support to newly injured spinal cord injured enabling their integration into their new life.
- I have achieved outcomes following my injury that surpass most other C6-7 quadriplegics.
- I live completely independent. Again, not many quads can say that.
- I have always had the support of my mother.
- I have the resolve to return to university.
- I have the strength to move from a small community to the largest city in Canada.
- I have the wisdom to maintain/improve my fitness.
- I have played wheelchair rugby on one of the best club teams in the country and am developing a pretty god one here in Toronto.
- I can talk to almost anybody about almost anything.
Negatives:
- I have had addictions for most of my life.
- I have lied and cheated people about those addiction such that it has cost me a lot of friends.
- I never developed a proper relationship with my father for the first 38 years of my life.
- I feel a gnawing that if not for getting help when I needed it, when I was a teenager, the sky would have been the limit.
- I have not developed friends that I can confide anything and everything to.
- I have been single all my life never understanding my true self.
So in sum, do I feel as if I am successful as I hit the big 4-0? Yes, I do. All my “bad” has been surrounded by a lot of good. I must remember that the list I have generated is filled with positives that far outweigh the negatives. I must also remember to look forward and not back. Looking backwards only instigates the negativity and the self-doubt.
Believe in and trust yourself.
"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me." Stuart Smalley
