i haven't a clue about a decent title. i UA'd most of my recent blog posts. i still want to write and post here but i realized that our mutual friends can read them. and a few of them have started to noticed that something isn't quite right... prolly cause unglued suck at lying and suck at being tactful.
it still seems like breaking up/divorcing is inevitable. we've gone thru all the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
a few people seem to think this is sudden and out of nowhere. but if one has known us for a long time (or read my blog/journal), they would realize that these issues aren't really new. and that this is more like we finally admitted things aren't right. i've been asked why we don't want to fix things. and i think it is because once we get used to the idea of not being unglued and a_c, nothing is changing.
i've seen other couples break up where they remain good friends. they occasionally have some resentment and dislikes about the relationship. but overall, they just realized it wasn't working.
the first time i saw a break up like this was when i was nanny. the mom had recently split from her ex and moved to ohio. she and the ex still owned a ski house and vacationed there together at xmas (that was a really strange trip at first. but after i got over my initial shock, it was a fun trip even tho i spent most of it taking care of the kid). the mom visited the ex on a pretty regular basis and they still professed to love each other. i suppose it is working, because both the mom and the ex are remarried with kids (and have been remarried for 8-10 years). another random tidbit, the mom and new husband got married at the ski house jointly owned by the mom and ex. and the ex and his wife attended the small wedding (i think there were maybe 30 people there total).
another long time couple recently broke up because one half wanted to move away. the other person did not so they split up. as far as i know, they are still on good terms, altho it is hard to remain close when you are living in separate continents. the last couple i know of that split amicably reminded me a lot of unglued and myself. the end of their relationship seemed similar to ours too.
or maybe this isn't the end. maybe it is break? or maybe we are fooling ourselves by thinking we can divorce while preserving our friendship? maybe i am too focused on moving and not enough on the end of the relationship?
i sorta pity the few people i trust to talk to in RL. those people have gotten a fairly steady stream of texts about my thoughts on the matter. but they are all very patient and encouraging. as for talking to unglued, we just keep asking each other a lot of unanswerable questions. are we making the right decision? why in the world do we feel closer now after the talk than before? will our friends still remain both our friends? won't the apartment be rather lonely when i move out? why don't we feel so sure about this anymore?
it still seems like breaking up/divorcing is inevitable. we've gone thru all the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
a few people seem to think this is sudden and out of nowhere. but if one has known us for a long time (or read my blog/journal), they would realize that these issues aren't really new. and that this is more like we finally admitted things aren't right. i've been asked why we don't want to fix things. and i think it is because once we get used to the idea of not being unglued and a_c, nothing is changing.
i've seen other couples break up where they remain good friends. they occasionally have some resentment and dislikes about the relationship. but overall, they just realized it wasn't working.
the first time i saw a break up like this was when i was nanny. the mom had recently split from her ex and moved to ohio. she and the ex still owned a ski house and vacationed there together at xmas (that was a really strange trip at first. but after i got over my initial shock, it was a fun trip even tho i spent most of it taking care of the kid). the mom visited the ex on a pretty regular basis and they still professed to love each other. i suppose it is working, because both the mom and the ex are remarried with kids (and have been remarried for 8-10 years). another random tidbit, the mom and new husband got married at the ski house jointly owned by the mom and ex. and the ex and his wife attended the small wedding (i think there were maybe 30 people there total).
another long time couple recently broke up because one half wanted to move away. the other person did not so they split up. as far as i know, they are still on good terms, altho it is hard to remain close when you are living in separate continents. the last couple i know of that split amicably reminded me a lot of unglued and myself. the end of their relationship seemed similar to ours too.
or maybe this isn't the end. maybe it is break? or maybe we are fooling ourselves by thinking we can divorce while preserving our friendship? maybe i am too focused on moving and not enough on the end of the relationship?
i sorta pity the few people i trust to talk to in RL. those people have gotten a fairly steady stream of texts about my thoughts on the matter. but they are all very patient and encouraging. as for talking to unglued, we just keep asking each other a lot of unanswerable questions. are we making the right decision? why in the world do we feel closer now after the talk than before? will our friends still remain both our friends? won't the apartment be rather lonely when i move out? why don't we feel so sure about this anymore?