I've been taking anywhere from 40-60mg of Oxycodone or Hydrocodone for close to 5 years now. It went from weekends, to weekdays, to keeping one by the bed so I could take it before I got out of bed in the mornings just to start the day. I spend SO much money on these things that for the first time, it's actually starting to affect my family and it's scaring me. I took my last one close to 80 hours ago and the worst of it is already behind me. I can feel my body getting better by the hour. My mind though...it's killing me. I feel like i'll never be happy again. I'm diagnosed ADHD and my mind is already shifting to maybe I should go get my Adderall script again? Even though I haven't had it in 10 years. I didn't abuse anything back then and I mostly gave it out to friends. But now i'm wrestling with myself thinking maybe this would help with energy. And it wouldn't be illegal because it's prescribed. What kind of thinking is that? Addict thinking. I'm looking for any easy way out I can find because this is miserable. I have a birthday party to go to next weekend and i'm already trying to find a way to cancel because who could enjoy a birthday party without opiates? Then I think, maybe I should get them "just for that weekend" to enjoy the party? 'Cause that always works...8) I guess i'm just venting. At this point it's hard to see why i'm even putting myself through this in the first place.