20 mg plugged using a 10 mg oral syringe up the butt, 4-5 ml of water used to 'dissolve' the 4-HO-DET (didn't want to dissolve all the way but that was fine for me, just getting it in will do the trick). Trip was quite to the point within 5 minutes of the dosage and I hadn’t even finished setting up my zone (putting the Ipod next to my bed and getting under the covers). I was a bit drowsy due to Methoxetamine dose earlier in the day (4-5 hours earlier) and the combo could be called into question but I doubt it had much of an effect on the trip.
Upon realization that I was tripping I began to feel nauseous and felt strongly that I would vomit or shit and the drowsiness was replaced with energy. On top of the usual tryptamine side effects I experienced an insane and almost crippling case of paranoia and anxiety. I was experiencing very strong feelings of being stretched and pulled apart and all kinds of fun things like teeth screeching and disturbing images of bodily contortion, (yada yada, bad trip in nutshell) but I knew that I could hold it down. I go to the drawer scared shitless and grab a 1 mg ativan to put my heart back down my throat.
As soon as I take the ativan I begin to question whether I have anxiety due to psychedelic usage. I was/am going through difficult times in my life due to money problems, relationship troubles and the ever present work and school stresses. Psychedelic usage has proven an ally but I have noticed that I am turning to Methoxetamine lately without getting any real answers out it. I pondered my Methoxetamine usage but could come to no certain conclusion as to its harm on me. I kept questioning what exactly was causing my anxiety and focused my trip on hopefully putting forth progress in that area.
While I am beginning the contemplation of reasons behind my anxiety, I start to trip full bore. I keep asking myself - why I do this to myself?Why do I need to put myself through this? I would blame the route of administration for initial anxiety mostly. 0 to 600000 MPH in 5 minutes is a little rough for this I guess; straight to the point but not exactly welcoming.
The biggest issue I face with myself now is replacing anxiety with enthusiasm and being able to keep a good mood around for a reasonable amount of time. I guess that something was working in my favor and somehow it was decided the big issue would be addressed tonight. I hadmy Ipod ready in my bedroom and crawled back under the sheets.
As soon as the headphones finally got put on, I did my best navigate my Ipod to something to set the trip. I put on Pink Floyd first and decide to listen to Momentary Lapse of Reason first and then Division Bell after that. This would be my first listen through of either album and I figured it would be a good choice.
They turned out to be the perfect choices for the trip quite quickly. The overall mood of Momentary seemed to be one of struggling optimism. The album shot me right into the mess of things and I realized that I couldn't keep looking at life so negatively. The way Dave was able to convey his feelings through the songs were amazing. I was able to connect completely with his words and music. The music weaved great amounts of imagery and I realized quickly that this was already a +++ and would end up closer to a ++++ on the Shulgin scale.
I could go on and on about how I felt but would say that the highlight of that portion of the trip was becoming empathetic with Dave through vocals and then making the connection to such a degree that I literally connected not only with the feelings he sang, but the music he played. Hard to describe it but I felt as if I was put on the exact same wavelength of the guitar when he was playing and that I was electrical guitar energy. This was probably the beginning of ego loss and I was able to resolve a great many things.
Momentary was so genius to me as it allowed me to move past “The Wall” type of thinking. Having listened to every Floyd album before these two, it was such a new way to see things. I felt like Gilmour was trying to put energy back into me and to help me out.
No more bitching about everything and closing everyone out or being so fucking whiny.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Everything above this line was wrote shortly after the experience, below this is a reflection written a month or two later
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The report sounds like I am a huge Pink Floyd fan. While this is true I feel there is no way to convey the significance of the experience. When I say “The Wall” type thinking I am referring to the cold and withdrawn type of person I have exemplified more and more for the last year. I became stuck in what seems to be a multilayered rut.
Psychedelics have made my life so much better in understanding myself and the world around me but they have done so without a connection between both understandings. The knowledge shown to me through the past year had opened me up more and more; so much so that I lost my way. This trip really brought me back on track with who I am and what I should be doing. I was able to center myself for a time and get back my focus.
The experience did not cure me but it did help me greatly out of the self-centered fog I was stuck in. There aren’t any words to describe the feeling of emotions being turned into pure energy. I could try to babble like other reports but it wouldn’t do justice to the experience itself.
Since this experience I have become increasingly aware of the energy transfer that occurs in day to day life. It is wonderful to realize exactly how connected everything is. I had felt it before on other psychedelics but this really helped me integrate how energy connects us all.
I could go on and on about this energy transfer kick that I have been in lately but I would like to post this report, seems to relatively few reports on this compound.
(Someone should also bug me about 4-HO-MPT through PM in a month or so. That trip report will take some time to write… basically forced me to confront my entire upbringing in 6 intense hours… in public.)
Tagged by bindingaffinity
substancecode_4hodet
substancecode_tryptamines
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_lifechanging
exptype_difficult
roacode_rectal
Upon realization that I was tripping I began to feel nauseous and felt strongly that I would vomit or shit and the drowsiness was replaced with energy. On top of the usual tryptamine side effects I experienced an insane and almost crippling case of paranoia and anxiety. I was experiencing very strong feelings of being stretched and pulled apart and all kinds of fun things like teeth screeching and disturbing images of bodily contortion, (yada yada, bad trip in nutshell) but I knew that I could hold it down. I go to the drawer scared shitless and grab a 1 mg ativan to put my heart back down my throat.
As soon as I take the ativan I begin to question whether I have anxiety due to psychedelic usage. I was/am going through difficult times in my life due to money problems, relationship troubles and the ever present work and school stresses. Psychedelic usage has proven an ally but I have noticed that I am turning to Methoxetamine lately without getting any real answers out it. I pondered my Methoxetamine usage but could come to no certain conclusion as to its harm on me. I kept questioning what exactly was causing my anxiety and focused my trip on hopefully putting forth progress in that area.
While I am beginning the contemplation of reasons behind my anxiety, I start to trip full bore. I keep asking myself - why I do this to myself?Why do I need to put myself through this? I would blame the route of administration for initial anxiety mostly. 0 to 600000 MPH in 5 minutes is a little rough for this I guess; straight to the point but not exactly welcoming.
The biggest issue I face with myself now is replacing anxiety with enthusiasm and being able to keep a good mood around for a reasonable amount of time. I guess that something was working in my favor and somehow it was decided the big issue would be addressed tonight. I hadmy Ipod ready in my bedroom and crawled back under the sheets.
As soon as the headphones finally got put on, I did my best navigate my Ipod to something to set the trip. I put on Pink Floyd first and decide to listen to Momentary Lapse of Reason first and then Division Bell after that. This would be my first listen through of either album and I figured it would be a good choice.
They turned out to be the perfect choices for the trip quite quickly. The overall mood of Momentary seemed to be one of struggling optimism. The album shot me right into the mess of things and I realized that I couldn't keep looking at life so negatively. The way Dave was able to convey his feelings through the songs were amazing. I was able to connect completely with his words and music. The music weaved great amounts of imagery and I realized quickly that this was already a +++ and would end up closer to a ++++ on the Shulgin scale.
I could go on and on about how I felt but would say that the highlight of that portion of the trip was becoming empathetic with Dave through vocals and then making the connection to such a degree that I literally connected not only with the feelings he sang, but the music he played. Hard to describe it but I felt as if I was put on the exact same wavelength of the guitar when he was playing and that I was electrical guitar energy. This was probably the beginning of ego loss and I was able to resolve a great many things.
Momentary was so genius to me as it allowed me to move past “The Wall” type of thinking. Having listened to every Floyd album before these two, it was such a new way to see things. I felt like Gilmour was trying to put energy back into me and to help me out.
No more bitching about everything and closing everyone out or being so fucking whiny.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Everything above this line was wrote shortly after the experience, below this is a reflection written a month or two later
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
The report sounds like I am a huge Pink Floyd fan. While this is true I feel there is no way to convey the significance of the experience. When I say “The Wall” type thinking I am referring to the cold and withdrawn type of person I have exemplified more and more for the last year. I became stuck in what seems to be a multilayered rut.
Psychedelics have made my life so much better in understanding myself and the world around me but they have done so without a connection between both understandings. The knowledge shown to me through the past year had opened me up more and more; so much so that I lost my way. This trip really brought me back on track with who I am and what I should be doing. I was able to center myself for a time and get back my focus.
The experience did not cure me but it did help me greatly out of the self-centered fog I was stuck in. There aren’t any words to describe the feeling of emotions being turned into pure energy. I could try to babble like other reports but it wouldn’t do justice to the experience itself.
Since this experience I have become increasingly aware of the energy transfer that occurs in day to day life. It is wonderful to realize exactly how connected everything is. I had felt it before on other psychedelics but this really helped me integrate how energy connects us all.
I could go on and on about this energy transfer kick that I have been in lately but I would like to post this report, seems to relatively few reports on this compound.
(Someone should also bug me about 4-HO-MPT through PM in a month or so. That trip report will take some time to write… basically forced me to confront my entire upbringing in 6 intense hours… in public.)
Tagged by bindingaffinity
substancecode_4hodet
substancecode_tryptamines
explevel_experienced
exptype_positive
exptype_lifechanging
exptype_difficult
roacode_rectal
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