BLULITER LackofMorality
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Oct 15, 2002
- Messages
- 133
i give up on justifying me...my mirror image letting go of "your honor's" robe
for all my hatred..against everything that i might fear, understand, or just deem wrong
for all my reasonings..no matter how simplistic or complex they may be
for the little love i have left..of this or that girl, art, and life itself
for my wants and desires..to grow, to prosper, to be known, to be challenged
my fears and insecurities..of pain in all its wonderous forms
my dualities and hypocrisies...which i am niether...which i am both
my chain linked confusion...or is it my confusion chain linked?
no matter how many poems...now marking #3,506
no matter how many discussions, calm or heated, with passion or for education
letters, essays, and papers..forced upon me, or willingly
no matter how much spelling it out i do, and yes that's S-P-E-L-L-I-N-G
no matter the scholarly discourse my students
you'll get me or you won't
nothing will peel the peach..
it might deter other's empathy
or recieve a downgrade instead of understanding
and forbid me from exterior sympathy..
but i am me... and sometimes i'm sad that no one can see that
that i fit every mold...and break it simuntaneously..
and just when you think you know me..i hit another extreme
or i change once again..my wonderful identity crisis
that endless search for me.....maybe i should really know me first...
but until then i'll continue shedding skin...and those who are clung to it
like little locusts with nothing left
until i'm comfortable, after the anestetics have worn thin
-------------------
orbs of opals beyond their brown reality
a diamond dusted napalm
amphetamined fireflies drunk with a jalepeno ginseng spritzer
something as soft and welcoming as a marshmallow bunny
yet ferm and stable as a futon
warm my blood to the point i'd try to protect myself
from this excessive heat by crawling in my own shadow
that turns my heart..and other prominent organs into gelatin
hypnotic and fierce leaving one in a invalid paralysis
inspiration for a controlled hysteria
igniting something brighter than plasma singing in my arteries
climbing my spine and hitting high notes of an anthem
--------------------------------------------------
the crease in my lobes nothing more than the Iranian and Iraqui boarder
each hemisphere with its own patrol
and yet they mingle in a neautral zone
standing in a toddler's awe of a quack of a magician...but the sorcery is real to them
the total opposite of mediocrity taken to a drag queen's extreme
why do i think in ways of daisies and death..
maybe my god and my satan are just different sides of the same coin
[ 30 November 2002: Message edited by: BLULITER LackofMorality ]
[ 30 November 2002: Message edited by: BLULITER LackofMorality ]
[ 04 December 2002: Message edited by: BLULITER LackofMorality ]
for all my hatred..against everything that i might fear, understand, or just deem wrong
for all my reasonings..no matter how simplistic or complex they may be
for the little love i have left..of this or that girl, art, and life itself
for my wants and desires..to grow, to prosper, to be known, to be challenged
my fears and insecurities..of pain in all its wonderous forms
my dualities and hypocrisies...which i am niether...which i am both
my chain linked confusion...or is it my confusion chain linked?
no matter how many poems...now marking #3,506
no matter how many discussions, calm or heated, with passion or for education
letters, essays, and papers..forced upon me, or willingly
no matter how much spelling it out i do, and yes that's S-P-E-L-L-I-N-G
no matter the scholarly discourse my students
you'll get me or you won't
nothing will peel the peach..
it might deter other's empathy
or recieve a downgrade instead of understanding
and forbid me from exterior sympathy..
but i am me... and sometimes i'm sad that no one can see that
that i fit every mold...and break it simuntaneously..
and just when you think you know me..i hit another extreme
or i change once again..my wonderful identity crisis
that endless search for me.....maybe i should really know me first...
but until then i'll continue shedding skin...and those who are clung to it
like little locusts with nothing left
until i'm comfortable, after the anestetics have worn thin
-------------------
orbs of opals beyond their brown reality
a diamond dusted napalm
amphetamined fireflies drunk with a jalepeno ginseng spritzer
something as soft and welcoming as a marshmallow bunny
yet ferm and stable as a futon
warm my blood to the point i'd try to protect myself
from this excessive heat by crawling in my own shadow
that turns my heart..and other prominent organs into gelatin
hypnotic and fierce leaving one in a invalid paralysis
inspiration for a controlled hysteria
igniting something brighter than plasma singing in my arteries
climbing my spine and hitting high notes of an anthem
--------------------------------------------------
the crease in my lobes nothing more than the Iranian and Iraqui boarder
each hemisphere with its own patrol
and yet they mingle in a neautral zone
standing in a toddler's awe of a quack of a magician...but the sorcery is real to them
the total opposite of mediocrity taken to a drag queen's extreme
why do i think in ways of daisies and death..
maybe my god and my satan are just different sides of the same coin
[ 30 November 2002: Message edited by: BLULITER LackofMorality ]
[ 30 November 2002: Message edited by: BLULITER LackofMorality ]
[ 04 December 2002: Message edited by: BLULITER LackofMorality ]
