It all started last night. I had some free time, and was ready for some fun. I am semi experienced with psychedelics, I have had about 8 experiences with mushrooms, done salvia and 5-MeO-DMT. For some reason this experience was way more intense than other 2C-I trips, yet approx. the same dose was taken each time(the doses are weighed).
11:35PM- Dose is taken, orally.
12:40PM- I am feeling mild effects, I am mentally prepared for the trip. Good state of mind. Music is key. Feeling slight nausea. Smoking some pot seems like a good idea.
approx 1:30AM- As I blow the smoke out my window, I notice the wind. I notice the clouds moving to the demands of the wind. I notice the clouds changing and morphing at fast fast speeds. At each morph of the clouds, I see something different. Thousands of images fly through my head at an awesome speed. One of the only images I remember is that of a face. A masculine white haired bearded smiling man. I was astonished.
2:30AM- Countless patterns, distortions. I was having a great time. Lying on my bed, this is where things go wrong. I remember drifting off peacefully, and my breathing comes to a halt. I liked the feeling and wanted to keep going. No pain was felt at this time. This is where I got scared and panicked.
I quickly snap out of it and realize what is happening. I jump out of my bed and grab some water. My breathing is shallow and I am numb. I can hardly breathe. I experienced death for as far as I am concerned. (this is hard to explain so bear with me)
I saw life for what it is, kind of like a memory. I saw all of existance. I saw the fears and confusion of people, and the enlightenment after death, the understanding of it all. I felt love, and something about blessed souls. I felt as if my soul had been blessed. Thoughts of heaven and hell were seen as an ancient attempt to grasp the concept of death. I felt liek death was "heaven" and "hell" at the same time. ...All of this while trying to remain alive helpless to it all.
3:00AM-5:00AM- From 2:30 til 5 I was pounding at my chest, keeping in motion, jumping around, being sure to not stay still. If I sat down I would drift off into that place. The scary part was that it did not hurt, it felt normal to die. That scared me. 3 minutes seemed like the longest time. Every minute or so I would be overwhelmed with the urge to pass out. My breathing was shallow. I was gasping for air. I told myself I would die before I called 911 (sad, yes). My face felt different. I would try to control the situation, but when I calmed down I would drift off. I was unsure of how to handle the situation. I felt like an old man about to die.I was not sure how much longer I could go on. Water was my best option. I could not even throw up.
Open or closed, my vision seemed the same. I felt like I knew what it was like to be blind. My vision was also pixelated like trying to look at my clock. One other thing that was quite frightening was the flashes I would see. About 5 times throughout the trip I would have a bright flash come across my vision. It seemed like phenomenons were occuring all the time ,but invisible to the unaided mind/eye.
6:00AM- Drift off to sleep peacefully, not feeling in danger for my life.
3:30PM- Wake up refreshed and with a new outlook on things.
All in all I think this was a good experience for me. I have realized that I do actually have fears. It's a good thing I didn't take a higher dose, which I wouldve done if my friend had let me. I feel like this chemical has infinite possibilities.
Hope u all enjoyed reading this, I suck at writing but I figured I should share this experience with others.
11:35PM- Dose is taken, orally.
12:40PM- I am feeling mild effects, I am mentally prepared for the trip. Good state of mind. Music is key. Feeling slight nausea. Smoking some pot seems like a good idea.
approx 1:30AM- As I blow the smoke out my window, I notice the wind. I notice the clouds moving to the demands of the wind. I notice the clouds changing and morphing at fast fast speeds. At each morph of the clouds, I see something different. Thousands of images fly through my head at an awesome speed. One of the only images I remember is that of a face. A masculine white haired bearded smiling man. I was astonished.
2:30AM- Countless patterns, distortions. I was having a great time. Lying on my bed, this is where things go wrong. I remember drifting off peacefully, and my breathing comes to a halt. I liked the feeling and wanted to keep going. No pain was felt at this time. This is where I got scared and panicked.
I quickly snap out of it and realize what is happening. I jump out of my bed and grab some water. My breathing is shallow and I am numb. I can hardly breathe. I experienced death for as far as I am concerned. (this is hard to explain so bear with me)
I saw life for what it is, kind of like a memory. I saw all of existance. I saw the fears and confusion of people, and the enlightenment after death, the understanding of it all. I felt love, and something about blessed souls. I felt as if my soul had been blessed. Thoughts of heaven and hell were seen as an ancient attempt to grasp the concept of death. I felt liek death was "heaven" and "hell" at the same time. ...All of this while trying to remain alive helpless to it all.
3:00AM-5:00AM- From 2:30 til 5 I was pounding at my chest, keeping in motion, jumping around, being sure to not stay still. If I sat down I would drift off into that place. The scary part was that it did not hurt, it felt normal to die. That scared me. 3 minutes seemed like the longest time. Every minute or so I would be overwhelmed with the urge to pass out. My breathing was shallow. I was gasping for air. I told myself I would die before I called 911 (sad, yes). My face felt different. I would try to control the situation, but when I calmed down I would drift off. I was unsure of how to handle the situation. I felt like an old man about to die.I was not sure how much longer I could go on. Water was my best option. I could not even throw up.
Open or closed, my vision seemed the same. I felt like I knew what it was like to be blind. My vision was also pixelated like trying to look at my clock. One other thing that was quite frightening was the flashes I would see. About 5 times throughout the trip I would have a bright flash come across my vision. It seemed like phenomenons were occuring all the time ,but invisible to the unaided mind/eye.
6:00AM- Drift off to sleep peacefully, not feeling in danger for my life.
3:30PM- Wake up refreshed and with a new outlook on things.
All in all I think this was a good experience for me. I have realized that I do actually have fears. It's a good thing I didn't take a higher dose, which I wouldve done if my friend had let me. I feel like this chemical has infinite possibilities.
Hope u all enjoyed reading this, I suck at writing but I figured I should share this experience with others.
)
