Morninggloryseed
Bluelight Crew
12/16/2006
50 milligrams of 2,5-dimethoxy-4-methylphenethylamine
Prologue:
Forgive me in advance dedicated readers for the brevity in this report, and lack of juicy details. There was not much to say about this experience, but as it has been many years since I have submitted a new report, I wanted to ‘check back in’ with you all after so much time.
My situation in life has significantly changed since previous writings. You see, for almost half of my life I have flirted with opiates, and since the end of 2002 I have been battling severe opiate addiction. Finally at the end of summer 2006 I sought medical treatment, and I am currently being maintained on buprenorphine (Suboxone) with the eventual goal of being opiate free.
During this time I have largely been avoiding psychedelics. In 2005 I had only two minor experiences; two +2 level trips...one 2C-C and one with mushrooms. And this summer (2006) I embarked on a wonderful 2C-B voyage during the Rainbow Gathering in Steamboat Springs, Colorado with my love and partner Winding Wines, a second 2C-B experience at Six Flags (an amusement park) with my cousin, and a 2C-D experience in September at a friend’s beautiful mountain home.
Now it is winter, and I generally do not like to trip in cold weather. However I was on vacation last week visiting my folks, and old friends in the Midwest where I grew up, and I really wanted to take a psychedelic with my best friend B (who I seldom see) sometime during my visit. After debating between 2C-D, psilacetin, 5-MeO-MiPT, and 2C-T-21…we chose 2C-D.
Usually under the influence of a psychedelic, I usually go inward and do not tend to be chatty. Socializing was never an activity I associated with tripping, even with the entactogens like MDMA and methylone. So I was pleasantly surprised and when I first tried 2C-D; very amazed by the ‘social nature’ I perceived with this material. With my first 2C-D experience, I took 40mg with an old friend (he took the same), and we spent the evening talking about everything and anything imaginable. There was almost an empathetic nature with it (i.e. like MDMA), but also with a sharp sense of mental clarity and psychedelic insight. I’ve subsequently always spoken of 2C-D as suitable for socialization, and deep insight, with friends or a partner.
This ‘socialization’ aspect was one of the main factors I considered when recommending 2C-D to my friend. We planned to spend the evening under the spell of a psychedelic, recording music, and catching up. I figured the social nature of the drug, combined with its short duration, would be perfect for a nice evening of music production, good conversation, and a general good time.
The Experience:
For this evening, I chose to take 50mg and my friend (who is usually hit very strongly by psychedelics) chose the more conservative dosage of 30mg. So 100mg of 2C-D hcl (accurately measured on a milligram-sensitive scale) was dissolved into 10ml of water, and dosages were measured out with a syringe. The solution was added to Gatorade and neither of us detected any taste.
Because of my friend’s work schedule, we did not start the experiment until 2:30am. Normally I never start this late, but it was my last full day in town. I was very tired, having had little sleep the night prior. But I did not think my lack of sleep would really influence the evening. I remembered back when I was a teen taking countless LSD voyages after long days at work, or school, and I always had wonderful experiences. Things did not turn out as planned.
We dosed, and smoked a bit of pot. As usual, 2C-D came on very quickly and within 20 minutes both of us were at a +2. Unlike my previous 2C-D experiences, I seemed to be hit very hard mentally (prior experiences were very ‘clear-headed’ - this was more along the lines of LSD-like confusion.) It made me very uncomfortable because I felt somewhat obligated to make conversation with my friend and be social. But I was being hit far too hard to make any kind of talk with him.
I asked my friend if he would be ok alone for a while, as I wanted to retreat to the shower. I find sitting in the shower during the come-up phase of a trip very comforting. While in the shower, I basically studied my mental state...by now a strong +3. For some reason, there was little OEV (usually 2C-D is fairly visual) but I had powerful CEVs that would meld into a dream-like state....sometimes OBE.
I would think of something, and soon found myself wherever I was thinking about. For instance, earlier in the day I had seen a special on Hitler. So I started thinking about the Nazi regime and ww2. It would get very deep...to the point of me thinking I was watching it in front of my eyes, forgetting I was tripping in the shower…so absorbed into my thoughts I was.
I really enjoyed this alone time, as well as the warmth of the shower. But all the while I thought about my friend (he tends to wig alone sometimes) and felt the need to see how he was...getting out after about 20 minutes. He was ok, fine actually…and was playing guitar along with a Pink Floyd recording.
We both felt some pot was in order, and the marijuana did what it is good at - greatly intensifying the psychedelic state. But for me, that also meant I felt even more separated from my friend. He kept talking to me, but I could barely respond.
Again felt the need to retreat, and found myself outside starring at the sky. Finally, I felt better. I realized how claustrophobic psychedelics make me feel indoors. I’ve been a strong advocate of tripping outdoors ever since I moved to Colorado. But I figured I’d be fine with 2C-D as I knew it well and it was a shortie…but that was not the case.
I went back in after some time and tried to socialize, but by this time my friend was thoroughly absorbed in the guitar and I had to again retreat outside…as the music he was playing far too chaotic for me to relax, and I became very anxious.
Once outside I felt great and chose to stay there for most of the peak. I can't say I was getting any deep insights, nor was I thinking about anything in particular…I just enjoying the warm air (it was an unusual warm night in the winter-time Midwest), beautiful sky, and pleasant warm body-buzz that 2C-D provides for me.
I stayed outside for an hour or so, and I finally started to come down and then was quite hungry. This was about at about the four-hour point, and my friend went to bed. I took a sedative to relax, and sleep for me came about six hours after ingestion.
Epilogue:
All in all, it was not one of my best trips. There were many thought-loops I'd get stuck in, and also some generalized anxiety. In addition, I was just never able to have any conversations with B as planned. I think the primary factor was that I was just plain exhausted. I was only in town for six days, and my family had made so many plans with me, that I was fairly beat for much of my vacation. Especially this night.
Further, I took almost twice as much as my friend, and was far more blown away than he was. I also have to remember my age...it is not that I feel ‘old’ at 30, but it is unrealistic for me to assume I can have a positive psychedelic experience while I am sleep deprived...just because I could when I was 17.
My friend B greatly enjoyed his experience, though he felt he could have taken a bit more than 30mg. His prior phenethylamine experiences are with MDA, 2C-B, 2C-I, and 2C-T-7, and this one is probably a new favorite for him. He found it clear, easy, but extremely deep in an LSD-like way.
The one really important thing I took back from the experience was the realization that I do not need to consume opium/other opiates in order to survive a psychedelic experience. In the first year after I became physically addicted to opiates I had tried a medium dose (30mg) of 2C-C, during a weekend with my girlfriend. What was normally a relaxing, almost sedating psychedelic was instead rendered to one that produced a chaotic and anxiety-ridden experience.
I actually went into severe opiate withdrawal and to survive, I had to opiate myself. I was trying to not use opiates around my partner that weekend, so it was an unpleasant thing to have to go back on my word. Even worse, she started feeding off my vibes and felt the same anxiety and pain that I did. It ended up leaving a huge psychological scar. Subsequently, I always made sure to take a good dose of an opiate before I took a psychedelic.
After going on the buprenorphine I feared I may never trip again. As illogical as this may seem, I was frightened that the buprenorphine would somehow not work, and I would go into withdrawal like I did on that 2C-C experience. Thankfully this was not the case during this latest experience.
As insignificant as all of this may seem, it is very important that I now know I can indeed take a psychedelic without having to ‘cheat’ myself by going off the buprenorphine, and using a euphoric opiate beforehand. This is a major step for me on my road to recovery…not just because I know I don’t need to take opium to trip…but because it is one more of life’s wonderful experiences that I now realize I can enjoy again, without opiates.
After years of convincing myself that I could not and would not live without opiates, discoveries like this are actually monumental occurrences for me. I am basically rewriting my view of life; slowly realizing that I will not be an opiate addict for life, and slowly realizing that eventually my slavery to that class of drugs will come to an end.
As for my feelings on 2C-D...they are the same. It is a fantastic, deep, pure psychedelic experience. Pleasantly short, yet meaningful. An all-around great ally in my book. Although this particular occasion was not the best experience I've had, certainly not the most fun...in the end it still proved to be valuable. And that is what counts the most.
MGS
50 milligrams of 2,5-dimethoxy-4-methylphenethylamine
Prologue:
Forgive me in advance dedicated readers for the brevity in this report, and lack of juicy details. There was not much to say about this experience, but as it has been many years since I have submitted a new report, I wanted to ‘check back in’ with you all after so much time.
My situation in life has significantly changed since previous writings. You see, for almost half of my life I have flirted with opiates, and since the end of 2002 I have been battling severe opiate addiction. Finally at the end of summer 2006 I sought medical treatment, and I am currently being maintained on buprenorphine (Suboxone) with the eventual goal of being opiate free.
During this time I have largely been avoiding psychedelics. In 2005 I had only two minor experiences; two +2 level trips...one 2C-C and one with mushrooms. And this summer (2006) I embarked on a wonderful 2C-B voyage during the Rainbow Gathering in Steamboat Springs, Colorado with my love and partner Winding Wines, a second 2C-B experience at Six Flags (an amusement park) with my cousin, and a 2C-D experience in September at a friend’s beautiful mountain home.
Now it is winter, and I generally do not like to trip in cold weather. However I was on vacation last week visiting my folks, and old friends in the Midwest where I grew up, and I really wanted to take a psychedelic with my best friend B (who I seldom see) sometime during my visit. After debating between 2C-D, psilacetin, 5-MeO-MiPT, and 2C-T-21…we chose 2C-D.
Usually under the influence of a psychedelic, I usually go inward and do not tend to be chatty. Socializing was never an activity I associated with tripping, even with the entactogens like MDMA and methylone. So I was pleasantly surprised and when I first tried 2C-D; very amazed by the ‘social nature’ I perceived with this material. With my first 2C-D experience, I took 40mg with an old friend (he took the same), and we spent the evening talking about everything and anything imaginable. There was almost an empathetic nature with it (i.e. like MDMA), but also with a sharp sense of mental clarity and psychedelic insight. I’ve subsequently always spoken of 2C-D as suitable for socialization, and deep insight, with friends or a partner.
This ‘socialization’ aspect was one of the main factors I considered when recommending 2C-D to my friend. We planned to spend the evening under the spell of a psychedelic, recording music, and catching up. I figured the social nature of the drug, combined with its short duration, would be perfect for a nice evening of music production, good conversation, and a general good time.
The Experience:
For this evening, I chose to take 50mg and my friend (who is usually hit very strongly by psychedelics) chose the more conservative dosage of 30mg. So 100mg of 2C-D hcl (accurately measured on a milligram-sensitive scale) was dissolved into 10ml of water, and dosages were measured out with a syringe. The solution was added to Gatorade and neither of us detected any taste.
Because of my friend’s work schedule, we did not start the experiment until 2:30am. Normally I never start this late, but it was my last full day in town. I was very tired, having had little sleep the night prior. But I did not think my lack of sleep would really influence the evening. I remembered back when I was a teen taking countless LSD voyages after long days at work, or school, and I always had wonderful experiences. Things did not turn out as planned.
We dosed, and smoked a bit of pot. As usual, 2C-D came on very quickly and within 20 minutes both of us were at a +2. Unlike my previous 2C-D experiences, I seemed to be hit very hard mentally (prior experiences were very ‘clear-headed’ - this was more along the lines of LSD-like confusion.) It made me very uncomfortable because I felt somewhat obligated to make conversation with my friend and be social. But I was being hit far too hard to make any kind of talk with him.
I asked my friend if he would be ok alone for a while, as I wanted to retreat to the shower. I find sitting in the shower during the come-up phase of a trip very comforting. While in the shower, I basically studied my mental state...by now a strong +3. For some reason, there was little OEV (usually 2C-D is fairly visual) but I had powerful CEVs that would meld into a dream-like state....sometimes OBE.
I would think of something, and soon found myself wherever I was thinking about. For instance, earlier in the day I had seen a special on Hitler. So I started thinking about the Nazi regime and ww2. It would get very deep...to the point of me thinking I was watching it in front of my eyes, forgetting I was tripping in the shower…so absorbed into my thoughts I was.
I really enjoyed this alone time, as well as the warmth of the shower. But all the while I thought about my friend (he tends to wig alone sometimes) and felt the need to see how he was...getting out after about 20 minutes. He was ok, fine actually…and was playing guitar along with a Pink Floyd recording.
We both felt some pot was in order, and the marijuana did what it is good at - greatly intensifying the psychedelic state. But for me, that also meant I felt even more separated from my friend. He kept talking to me, but I could barely respond.
Again felt the need to retreat, and found myself outside starring at the sky. Finally, I felt better. I realized how claustrophobic psychedelics make me feel indoors. I’ve been a strong advocate of tripping outdoors ever since I moved to Colorado. But I figured I’d be fine with 2C-D as I knew it well and it was a shortie…but that was not the case.
I went back in after some time and tried to socialize, but by this time my friend was thoroughly absorbed in the guitar and I had to again retreat outside…as the music he was playing far too chaotic for me to relax, and I became very anxious.
Once outside I felt great and chose to stay there for most of the peak. I can't say I was getting any deep insights, nor was I thinking about anything in particular…I just enjoying the warm air (it was an unusual warm night in the winter-time Midwest), beautiful sky, and pleasant warm body-buzz that 2C-D provides for me.
I stayed outside for an hour or so, and I finally started to come down and then was quite hungry. This was about at about the four-hour point, and my friend went to bed. I took a sedative to relax, and sleep for me came about six hours after ingestion.
Epilogue:
All in all, it was not one of my best trips. There were many thought-loops I'd get stuck in, and also some generalized anxiety. In addition, I was just never able to have any conversations with B as planned. I think the primary factor was that I was just plain exhausted. I was only in town for six days, and my family had made so many plans with me, that I was fairly beat for much of my vacation. Especially this night.
Further, I took almost twice as much as my friend, and was far more blown away than he was. I also have to remember my age...it is not that I feel ‘old’ at 30, but it is unrealistic for me to assume I can have a positive psychedelic experience while I am sleep deprived...just because I could when I was 17.
My friend B greatly enjoyed his experience, though he felt he could have taken a bit more than 30mg. His prior phenethylamine experiences are with MDA, 2C-B, 2C-I, and 2C-T-7, and this one is probably a new favorite for him. He found it clear, easy, but extremely deep in an LSD-like way.
The one really important thing I took back from the experience was the realization that I do not need to consume opium/other opiates in order to survive a psychedelic experience. In the first year after I became physically addicted to opiates I had tried a medium dose (30mg) of 2C-C, during a weekend with my girlfriend. What was normally a relaxing, almost sedating psychedelic was instead rendered to one that produced a chaotic and anxiety-ridden experience.
I actually went into severe opiate withdrawal and to survive, I had to opiate myself. I was trying to not use opiates around my partner that weekend, so it was an unpleasant thing to have to go back on my word. Even worse, she started feeding off my vibes and felt the same anxiety and pain that I did. It ended up leaving a huge psychological scar. Subsequently, I always made sure to take a good dose of an opiate before I took a psychedelic.
After going on the buprenorphine I feared I may never trip again. As illogical as this may seem, I was frightened that the buprenorphine would somehow not work, and I would go into withdrawal like I did on that 2C-C experience. Thankfully this was not the case during this latest experience.
As insignificant as all of this may seem, it is very important that I now know I can indeed take a psychedelic without having to ‘cheat’ myself by going off the buprenorphine, and using a euphoric opiate beforehand. This is a major step for me on my road to recovery…not just because I know I don’t need to take opium to trip…but because it is one more of life’s wonderful experiences that I now realize I can enjoy again, without opiates.
After years of convincing myself that I could not and would not live without opiates, discoveries like this are actually monumental occurrences for me. I am basically rewriting my view of life; slowly realizing that I will not be an opiate addict for life, and slowly realizing that eventually my slavery to that class of drugs will come to an end.
As for my feelings on 2C-D...they are the same. It is a fantastic, deep, pure psychedelic experience. Pleasantly short, yet meaningful. An all-around great ally in my book. Although this particular occasion was not the best experience I've had, certainly not the most fun...in the end it still proved to be valuable. And that is what counts the most.
MGS
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