psilosara
Bluelighter
- Joined
- May 13, 2003
- Messages
- 56
7pm Friday night. I hear that my friend was not actually visiting for the weekend after all so we needed to come up with fun plans, quick. We had a lot of beer so I decided to drink some of it with my friend W. We decided on a power half hour to see what we could handle during a Family Guy episode. I drank about 5 beers and quit. We didn't really do anything for a while and I was sobering up. My boyfriend, who worked early that morning, was falling asleep on the couch. It was about 9:30. He said he was going to sleep and we all teased him and let him go.
I wrote an IM to him for goodnight and was getting ready to watch a movie with W and T [who was tripping]. Within a few minutes he wrote back that he didn't really want to go to bed, he was thinking about a dose of 2C-B. Oh that sounds like a great idea! I knew I was being impulsive but aware that the alcohol in me wouldn't be enough to make taking some myself a bad idea. I'd been wanting to try 2C-B after what I heard of his experience, and had been waiting for the right night. Our friend was supposed to be bringing us acid, so this will just have to do =). So we head up to his room to get our drugs and watch the movie [The Transporter]. W decides to take some too. T is already on 2C-I and a little 2C-B I believe, but he had dosed at least 3 hours before.
T+ 0:00. Bluedolphin opens a cap and removes about a fifth of the powder. I take what remains, I believe about 20mg. It's about 10 or so. We start the movie. I have that excited butterfly feeling of a little adrenaline.
T+ 0:30. Same feeling, plus an excited glow because I don't feel normal, I feel better than normal. I get into the movie, fight scenes are more interesting and beautiful.
T+ 1:00. We decide to pause the movie for a smoke session. I know we smoked but I've no memory of it. I don't believe that smoking added much to the experience. The drug was introducing itself quickly but not overwhelmingly. My heart rate increased a bit and I got some gentle muscle tremors, which actually were almost pleasant. I remember sharing that I had them but along with my buzz they felt cool, just a vibration of some calf muscle. The walls were breathing, and the room was alive. I note how usually I'm aware of being the only live thing except for my cactus when alone in my room. This is different, I'm sharing the cavity of a room that breathes just a little slower than me.
T+ 2:00 or so. Around the time we got stoned my memory lost track of order. The rest of the night is a bit of a jumble. The movie is over and we're listening to music. I'm feeling some weirdness, I expected 2C-B to feel something like E or acid, and I can't identify any similarities yet. I have very little experience with acid, but I'd say the weirdness [which wasn't bad, just dominating my senses in its novelty, but at this point making me a little claustrophobic] felt more like acid. Disputes on this welcomed =). I guess it's because I felt full: full of life and feeling that I'm not used to but enjoy, which reminded me of acid.
So making hot chocolate in the kitchen was the best idea when I needed some air and a soothing drink. W said he would come along. Walking down the hallway was fabulous. The walls swayed a bit but I felt lighter than air, like walking on the moon. I could have ran forever without using my own strength. I found myself in the kitchen alone. My brain was not going to help me sound just stoned if I talk to the kids at the tv. I should note some discomfort whenever I'm around them tripping, because they were my tripping buddies last year but this year they swore off everything. I didn't want to talk to them. I did talk, however. They were passing around a massive dill pickle, the smell of the bitten cuke filled the room and made my eyes water. I nervously conversed but didn't say much. I felt great, not like E which was what I expected, nevertheless it was quite enjoyable. I didn't think my mind was working differently, which I was aware of with acid, but it was just as fun. I was carefree and excited about the night, my thought patterns more empathetic, appreciative on the whole and not focusing on anything that stays with me now. Making the hot cocoa became a rather difficult task, and I was lonely.
W shows up, grinning like a maniac. I inform him how hard it has been to make this hot chocolate, the water for which may or may not be boiling. He whispers to me 'I heard someone say “Hey G can I have a bite of your pickle?' And I got uncomfortable so I just walked upstairs.” I giggle at this (gosh that felt great, I love getting the giggles), which he then says again three times for no apparent reason at all, and I can't stop laughing now. Dude! You just said that four times! But he's giggling as much as I am and obviously not disturbed. Hehe, I turn around from the stove and he has the campus phone up to his ear and looks about to dial. “I love prank phone calls.” “Dude!” This is serious to me, he should not be phoning anyone in his condition. It also is hysterical because it begins the giggling and hearty laughter fit that continues for about a half hour. Making the cocoa we discuss how crazy we are, deciding that nobody else could probably understand us. Funny stuff. More laughing.
Attempting to not spill I bring the mugs back upstairs, preparing myself for music and socializing. I'm still paralyzed (well, uncontrollably doubled-over) with laughter. Then reclining so fast I knock T's arm holding the mug. Party foul #1. I look over at my boyfriend, lying on the bed, pleasant grin on his face, listening to the music. It astounds me what different trips we are having. I liked the subtle and optimistic introspection I had, and the fact that I was able to enjoy other effects, like the laughing and the empathy. I wondered what else he was feeling, how his body interpreted the drug. I had mostly calmed but it didn't take too much to get the giggles started again. I loved how it reminded me of my first mushroom trip.
My high, the buzz and the mild euphoria, were calmer and I could focus just a bit on the bodily side-effects, nominally the 'heavy stomach' as I termed it. I'm not very good at describing all this stuff, feeling full but also like I was inside a large heavy blob, and felt the weight of the blob. I was no longer comfortable on my chair. Gosh bluedolphin looked comfortable lying in bed. I joined him, and oh yes it felt so nice to evenly distribute weight over the body. Ahhh calm.
Closed eye visuals were electric. Only a few of the same neon colors I'd been seeing on my last two trips [shrooms and 2C-I] were present, and the designs that formed with closed or open eyes were beautiful. I like bluedolphin's description of the Aztec designs he saw on I believe 2C-I [?] because the patterns I was seeing can only be described like that. There were many angles and shapes, rather than any swirls or shiftings. Beautiful designs. Eyes open was very colorful. Anything that had a bit of light on it I saw a lot on, colorful and bright. From what I shared then my boyfriend said it reminded him of acid. I'm hoping for some real visuals on that in a few weeks. Overall the visuals were not outstanding but fun. I hardly paid attention to them, because the music and the conversation were superb. The music pulled at me, moving me with voice and pitch and strings, most of all. My friends were funny and charming and interesting. I loved to talk and share, we shared our introspection, but that night the discussion did not go to politics like usual. Perhaps the empathy restrained us.
From bed I slowly turned my attention to the music alone. W decided he wanted to go on a journey, and I wanted to go. But I was so lethargic in my buzzy state that when my boyfriend decided to stay it made the most sense. I'm so glad I stayed. We put on some Bob Dylan, and ohh was it glorious. I have listened to Bob Dylan since I could understand music and before, and have always appreciated and loved his music. That night, I reached a new level of appreciation. His words, which I never fully understood in many ballads, made perfect sense. And they were stunning. His poetry and especially his voice was so powerful, so passionate, that I was moved to the point I knew I would never forget. His politics are admirable and clever, his melodies attuned to his singing. One thing that became clear was that my memory of lyrics was uncanny. I have the lyrics in my head somewhere, but songs I had not played in years sung themselves. And I would like to think that for once I did not sing off key, the music was inside of me. Then came two Dave Matthews Band songs, Two Step and the Space Between, which are a few of my favorites and again, I moved with his voice, felt everything the song conveyed, and understood what the music meant. The music was art I had never embraced fully, art that filled me. There were many other songs that all did the same. Except the Smashing Pumpkins, which is a favorite band of mine. For some reason I couldn't click with them. Same thing happened with acid and Sound Tribe Sector 9, which I love but couldn't stand to listen to tripping.
I spent the rest of the socializing talking about Dylan and listening. T soon left and bluedolphin and I talked and laughed, he wasn't tripping as hard as I was and found everything I said funny or insane. But my heavy stomach was getting heavier and I was horribly restless. Nothing felt comfortable, and even if it was, I automatically changed my position within a minute or so. I think we smoked again and that helped a bit, but I felt speedy with jaw clench and like I weighed 400 pounds. I didn't feel sensual, so putting all my energy into sex was an unfortunately lost cause. Soon it was 5 am or so. I had been waiting a long time, just lying restless. So I went down to my room. I wanted my bed and hoped my cracked-outness would subside. I don't know why I left now, although bluedolphin wouldn't've been able to fall asleep if I had stayed, and I knew he really wanted to. His trip seemed much better near the end, mellow and calm. Later he said he fell asleep about as soon as I left.
My room felt very empty, but alive. I felt even more alive, because I was thinking doubletime, aware of the drug that still had a strong hold of me, now at least 5 hours after ingestion. I wondered why it was lasting so long, but didn't get that paranoid thought I used to get “I'm going to be tripping forever.” hehe, glad those days are over. As I undressed I looked down at my stomach and saw the drug within me. Lines like rivers of veins glowed and streamed down my belly, and as I breathed I felt like by covering my stomach with my hands I was feeling whatever was possessing me as well. This was a little creepy, and I didn't want to be alone. I had to be alone though. This was clear, although without explanation. I calmed and reminded myself that it would be diminishing.
I lay in bed tossing and turning for another two hours. Uncomfortable and annoyed but not angry, actually rather patient considering. Then I remembered my melatonin. Thank goodness, because within a half hour of swallowing it, I was asleep.
So overall I had a wonderful night. This drug would blow me away at a concert, and next time if it's as speedy the melatonin will be ingested much earlier. I wonder though, why it had such a different effect on me than bluedolphin. Oh, and W had a marvelous night, spent looking at the lake and psychedelic art until he also lay in bed for hours pleasantly thinking. I prefer 2C-B over 2C-I, the former felt deeper and more introspective for me, although that is the opposite of most reports I've read. 2C-I was fun but lost it's charm within two trips for me, and it felt very shallow. 2C-B, although I would agree it's a great recreational / party drug, actually delivered the depth I missed with 2C-I.
Thanks for reading all that, I know I go on and on =).
peace
I wrote an IM to him for goodnight and was getting ready to watch a movie with W and T [who was tripping]. Within a few minutes he wrote back that he didn't really want to go to bed, he was thinking about a dose of 2C-B. Oh that sounds like a great idea! I knew I was being impulsive but aware that the alcohol in me wouldn't be enough to make taking some myself a bad idea. I'd been wanting to try 2C-B after what I heard of his experience, and had been waiting for the right night. Our friend was supposed to be bringing us acid, so this will just have to do =). So we head up to his room to get our drugs and watch the movie [The Transporter]. W decides to take some too. T is already on 2C-I and a little 2C-B I believe, but he had dosed at least 3 hours before.
T+ 0:00. Bluedolphin opens a cap and removes about a fifth of the powder. I take what remains, I believe about 20mg. It's about 10 or so. We start the movie. I have that excited butterfly feeling of a little adrenaline.
T+ 0:30. Same feeling, plus an excited glow because I don't feel normal, I feel better than normal. I get into the movie, fight scenes are more interesting and beautiful.
T+ 1:00. We decide to pause the movie for a smoke session. I know we smoked but I've no memory of it. I don't believe that smoking added much to the experience. The drug was introducing itself quickly but not overwhelmingly. My heart rate increased a bit and I got some gentle muscle tremors, which actually were almost pleasant. I remember sharing that I had them but along with my buzz they felt cool, just a vibration of some calf muscle. The walls were breathing, and the room was alive. I note how usually I'm aware of being the only live thing except for my cactus when alone in my room. This is different, I'm sharing the cavity of a room that breathes just a little slower than me.
T+ 2:00 or so. Around the time we got stoned my memory lost track of order. The rest of the night is a bit of a jumble. The movie is over and we're listening to music. I'm feeling some weirdness, I expected 2C-B to feel something like E or acid, and I can't identify any similarities yet. I have very little experience with acid, but I'd say the weirdness [which wasn't bad, just dominating my senses in its novelty, but at this point making me a little claustrophobic] felt more like acid. Disputes on this welcomed =). I guess it's because I felt full: full of life and feeling that I'm not used to but enjoy, which reminded me of acid.
So making hot chocolate in the kitchen was the best idea when I needed some air and a soothing drink. W said he would come along. Walking down the hallway was fabulous. The walls swayed a bit but I felt lighter than air, like walking on the moon. I could have ran forever without using my own strength. I found myself in the kitchen alone. My brain was not going to help me sound just stoned if I talk to the kids at the tv. I should note some discomfort whenever I'm around them tripping, because they were my tripping buddies last year but this year they swore off everything. I didn't want to talk to them. I did talk, however. They were passing around a massive dill pickle, the smell of the bitten cuke filled the room and made my eyes water. I nervously conversed but didn't say much. I felt great, not like E which was what I expected, nevertheless it was quite enjoyable. I didn't think my mind was working differently, which I was aware of with acid, but it was just as fun. I was carefree and excited about the night, my thought patterns more empathetic, appreciative on the whole and not focusing on anything that stays with me now. Making the hot cocoa became a rather difficult task, and I was lonely.
W shows up, grinning like a maniac. I inform him how hard it has been to make this hot chocolate, the water for which may or may not be boiling. He whispers to me 'I heard someone say “Hey G can I have a bite of your pickle?' And I got uncomfortable so I just walked upstairs.” I giggle at this (gosh that felt great, I love getting the giggles), which he then says again three times for no apparent reason at all, and I can't stop laughing now. Dude! You just said that four times! But he's giggling as much as I am and obviously not disturbed. Hehe, I turn around from the stove and he has the campus phone up to his ear and looks about to dial. “I love prank phone calls.” “Dude!” This is serious to me, he should not be phoning anyone in his condition. It also is hysterical because it begins the giggling and hearty laughter fit that continues for about a half hour. Making the cocoa we discuss how crazy we are, deciding that nobody else could probably understand us. Funny stuff. More laughing.
Attempting to not spill I bring the mugs back upstairs, preparing myself for music and socializing. I'm still paralyzed (well, uncontrollably doubled-over) with laughter. Then reclining so fast I knock T's arm holding the mug. Party foul #1. I look over at my boyfriend, lying on the bed, pleasant grin on his face, listening to the music. It astounds me what different trips we are having. I liked the subtle and optimistic introspection I had, and the fact that I was able to enjoy other effects, like the laughing and the empathy. I wondered what else he was feeling, how his body interpreted the drug. I had mostly calmed but it didn't take too much to get the giggles started again. I loved how it reminded me of my first mushroom trip.
My high, the buzz and the mild euphoria, were calmer and I could focus just a bit on the bodily side-effects, nominally the 'heavy stomach' as I termed it. I'm not very good at describing all this stuff, feeling full but also like I was inside a large heavy blob, and felt the weight of the blob. I was no longer comfortable on my chair. Gosh bluedolphin looked comfortable lying in bed. I joined him, and oh yes it felt so nice to evenly distribute weight over the body. Ahhh calm.
Closed eye visuals were electric. Only a few of the same neon colors I'd been seeing on my last two trips [shrooms and 2C-I] were present, and the designs that formed with closed or open eyes were beautiful. I like bluedolphin's description of the Aztec designs he saw on I believe 2C-I [?] because the patterns I was seeing can only be described like that. There were many angles and shapes, rather than any swirls or shiftings. Beautiful designs. Eyes open was very colorful. Anything that had a bit of light on it I saw a lot on, colorful and bright. From what I shared then my boyfriend said it reminded him of acid. I'm hoping for some real visuals on that in a few weeks. Overall the visuals were not outstanding but fun. I hardly paid attention to them, because the music and the conversation were superb. The music pulled at me, moving me with voice and pitch and strings, most of all. My friends were funny and charming and interesting. I loved to talk and share, we shared our introspection, but that night the discussion did not go to politics like usual. Perhaps the empathy restrained us.
From bed I slowly turned my attention to the music alone. W decided he wanted to go on a journey, and I wanted to go. But I was so lethargic in my buzzy state that when my boyfriend decided to stay it made the most sense. I'm so glad I stayed. We put on some Bob Dylan, and ohh was it glorious. I have listened to Bob Dylan since I could understand music and before, and have always appreciated and loved his music. That night, I reached a new level of appreciation. His words, which I never fully understood in many ballads, made perfect sense. And they were stunning. His poetry and especially his voice was so powerful, so passionate, that I was moved to the point I knew I would never forget. His politics are admirable and clever, his melodies attuned to his singing. One thing that became clear was that my memory of lyrics was uncanny. I have the lyrics in my head somewhere, but songs I had not played in years sung themselves. And I would like to think that for once I did not sing off key, the music was inside of me. Then came two Dave Matthews Band songs, Two Step and the Space Between, which are a few of my favorites and again, I moved with his voice, felt everything the song conveyed, and understood what the music meant. The music was art I had never embraced fully, art that filled me. There were many other songs that all did the same. Except the Smashing Pumpkins, which is a favorite band of mine. For some reason I couldn't click with them. Same thing happened with acid and Sound Tribe Sector 9, which I love but couldn't stand to listen to tripping.
I spent the rest of the socializing talking about Dylan and listening. T soon left and bluedolphin and I talked and laughed, he wasn't tripping as hard as I was and found everything I said funny or insane. But my heavy stomach was getting heavier and I was horribly restless. Nothing felt comfortable, and even if it was, I automatically changed my position within a minute or so. I think we smoked again and that helped a bit, but I felt speedy with jaw clench and like I weighed 400 pounds. I didn't feel sensual, so putting all my energy into sex was an unfortunately lost cause. Soon it was 5 am or so. I had been waiting a long time, just lying restless. So I went down to my room. I wanted my bed and hoped my cracked-outness would subside. I don't know why I left now, although bluedolphin wouldn't've been able to fall asleep if I had stayed, and I knew he really wanted to. His trip seemed much better near the end, mellow and calm. Later he said he fell asleep about as soon as I left.
My room felt very empty, but alive. I felt even more alive, because I was thinking doubletime, aware of the drug that still had a strong hold of me, now at least 5 hours after ingestion. I wondered why it was lasting so long, but didn't get that paranoid thought I used to get “I'm going to be tripping forever.” hehe, glad those days are over. As I undressed I looked down at my stomach and saw the drug within me. Lines like rivers of veins glowed and streamed down my belly, and as I breathed I felt like by covering my stomach with my hands I was feeling whatever was possessing me as well. This was a little creepy, and I didn't want to be alone. I had to be alone though. This was clear, although without explanation. I calmed and reminded myself that it would be diminishing.
I lay in bed tossing and turning for another two hours. Uncomfortable and annoyed but not angry, actually rather patient considering. Then I remembered my melatonin. Thank goodness, because within a half hour of swallowing it, I was asleep.
So overall I had a wonderful night. This drug would blow me away at a concert, and next time if it's as speedy the melatonin will be ingested much earlier. I wonder though, why it had such a different effect on me than bluedolphin. Oh, and W had a marvelous night, spent looking at the lake and psychedelic art until he also lay in bed for hours pleasantly thinking. I prefer 2C-B over 2C-I, the former felt deeper and more introspective for me, although that is the opposite of most reports I've read. 2C-I was fun but lost it's charm within two trips for me, and it felt very shallow. 2C-B, although I would agree it's a great recreational / party drug, actually delivered the depth I missed with 2C-I.
Thanks for reading all that, I know I go on and on =).
peace
